Chapter 430 - Lost Time

"How can you say that?" Ariana whispered. "What?" Cayden asked as he finally let Ariana go from his embrace. "How can you just say that no one else matter? Didn't everyone love you? Take care of you? Treat you like family?" Ariana asked as she rolled to her aide and faced Cayden. Cayden let out a small chuckle. "But they weren't you."

"Of course they weren't! Everyone is a different person who-?!" Ariana started to protest but the look Cayden gave her made her stop talking instantly. He wasn't upset for her arguing, in fact he looked at her lovingly as if he was expecting her to argue over the choices he made. "I love you." He said as he smiled at her.

Ariana's heart skipped a beat. He looked so angelic laying beside her, his golden hair was slightly messy and his grey eyes sparkles silver, hoping that his words touched her heart. She opened her mouth and tried to say it back like she always did but it got stuck in her throat. She closed her mouth and just looked up at Cayden from under her lashes.

"And you didn't think that those people meant the world to me? You can say you love me but what you just told me... Not caring about them... Do you really think I would be okay with that?" Ariana asked reluctantly.

Cayden sighed. He raised his hand and tried to touch her face but he hesitated. He couldn't bring himself to touch her instead he picked up a lock of her hair and held it in between his thumb and index finger. His face mirrored the torture he was feeling inside but he wasn't going to risk another form of rejection.

"I know... So I made a deal with that man. He wasn't allowed to touch your family. No matter what they saw, heard or how I felt they were not allowed to lay a finger on you or the ones you loved." Cayden replied.

"You just said you didn't care about them and now you made a deal? Cayden! You're just telling me what I want to hear... How can I know that this isn't some sort of trick? You're part of the Rebellion at any given time you could bring me to your group leader and-?!"

"No! I could never!" Cayden shouted as he shot up from the bed and looked at Ariana desperately. The pain in his eyes made Ariana avert her own gaze. "You say that but I don't know. You're story is just way to convenient, who is the man that found you anyways?" Ariana asked. "My father." Cayden replied coldly. Ariana flinched, she knew Cayden hated his father and wouldn't have gone voluntarily. "To be exact it was his personal aide who came to the cafe. He actually turned into a regular and reported everything to that man. When he thought I could be used he had him deliver a letter. I had no choice. I wasn't strong enough." Cayden said as he looked at Ariana.

He brought up his hand again, it shook slightly, afraid to be rejected again but he couldn't hold back his desire. He brought it close to Ariana's face and he held his breath. He looked into her eyes and let out a small gasp. There was no hatred or fear just hope. He swallowed back some saliva to wet his dry throat and closed the distance. His hand laid gingerly on the side of her face, relief spread across his own face as he gently stroked her cheek with his thumb.

Ariana closed her eyes and leaned into his hand. "Does my mother know why you left?" Ariana asked. "Yes." Cayden said breathlessly. "So when I cried my heart out she just comforted me... She never once said a bad thing about you or tried to make me look for a new love." Ariana said as she opened her eyes and glance up at Cayden. He shivered as he looked down, his cheeks slightly turned pink and his lips trembled. "And I thank her for that." He whispered as he started to lean downwards.

His eyes started to half close the closer he got and Ariana's heart started to beat faster. "So you know about me being a monster?" She whispered just as Cayden's lips were just about to seal hers. He froze. "... You're not a monster." He whispered back, afraid to move away. Ariana raised her hands and placed them on his chest, waiting for an excuse to push him away. "So you knew?" She asked quietly. "I guessed. You did show up at that man's house how could I not notice you?" Cayden said as he moved back to see her face. "So... Why didn't you come looking for me for an explanation?" Ariana asked. "I couldn't. That man made me promise to stay away from you. If I even sent you a single letter he would have destroyed you." Cayden said as let go of Ariana's face and moved his hand to hers. He wrapped his fingers around the hand pressing against his chest and looked at Ariana with nothing but a mixture pain, fear, and affection. 

"It hurt so much to not let you know I saw you. It hurt to not break away from them and run up to you, it hurt to see you fly away and never send me another letter. I hoped you would have come to me again. I prayed everyday you would come find me in the middle of the night and we would..."

"But then my prays turned to self hatred. I hated that I yearned for you, I hated that I missed your scent, the touch of your skin, the softness of your lips. I hated that I kept your letters and ribbon, that I couldn't bare to throw them away and just focus on my missions. I hated that I felt betrayed by you... That man said you found someone better, that you found your soul mate and ran off. He even asked if I wanted to destroy the cafe." Cayden said with a pained laugh.