Chapter 548 - What are you thinking about? (2)

1 June, Matthew's Villa, City K

As he finished Matthew moved leant over and gently kissed Lexi before adding "It is amazing to wake up with you beside me. I wondered months ago if all this ever would be was a dream, but the reality is more than I could ever believe."

With a gentle smile on her face Lexi said, "Sweet talking me?"

"Telling the truth my love. Despite trying to move on after your so-called marriage with that arse, I could only ever imagine waking up with you by my side. Yes, I dated, but no matter how close I got to them, I could never see them as we are now. Not only content and happy, but knowing we are with the person we love."

Lexi gently shook her head and added "Stop lying to me. A man such as yourself, you would have had other women in your life."

"Lexi, you forget, we made a commitment to each other when I joined the military, and we cemented that at the time you fell pregnant with Dominic. You know me, I take my commitment's seriously…"

Lexi reached behind her and pulled out a pillow before hitting Matthew with it and saying, "And you think I do not?"

"Did I say that?" came a somewhat remorseful reply from Matthew. "I did not. I had given you my heart, when we made those commitments, and my heart stayed with you. And I suspect that despite what your parents did and the hurt that caused, you had given your heart to me. I never found anyone that I liked enough that shook that commitment. And even if I did, not only did I have to undo things, but the question would also have been could they have passed the necessary screening to allow me to tell them about my career? It would have been a lottery it the person was a civilian, and a fellow soldier, that would make me run the other way…"

"Hypocrite. You can be a soldier, but a woman…?"

Laughing, Matthew said "No. Some of the best soldiers under my command currently happen to be women. A relationship with another soldier would have not separated my career from my personal life. The last few months have demonstrated to me that while I love my career, I cherish the time away from it with my family. It has given me perspective that I have not had, because I have been so wrapped up in my career. You, sweetheart, have made me yearn for a somewhat simpler life. Go to work, do what I have to, and come home to my family."

"You, a simple life? That is laughable," giggled Lexi. "You the special forces soldier, a leader of men and women, not wanting what you have. Of everything your horrid parents attempted to instil into you as a child, the need to be a leader is, in my view, the one good attribute that both you and Phillip took onboard. Him to head JL International, and in your military role. It is difficult for a leader to lead the simple life."

"So says the capitalist businesswoman…"

Lexi could not help snorting in laughter at that. "And how do you think we have this place?"

Matthew laughed, before saying "You have me there."

After leaning over and giving Lexi another brief kiss, he said "Honesty?"

"That would be lovely. You have my imagination running wild here, with the women in your past that I have to compete with."

"There is no competition. There was…"

"You better not lie and say no one. As if, someone like you could wait that long."

"Give me a chance, to actually finish something. There was three women, all in the couple of years after I came back here and Phillip told me you had married, Richard had died, and you had left the country. I was trying to forget you and being young and stupid figured s.e.x with other women was the way to do it. I realised that it was meaningless unless emotions were involved and my heart was committed to the relationship so I walked away from that, figuring that there would be someone who would engage me in a proper relationship, one where my heart, body and mind were involved. Little did I expect it would be the one person I knew had already shown me what a true relationship was."

Lexi could not help herself, and felt that she blushed, before hearing Matthew add "There is no need to be embarrassed. It is the truth, and I know regardless of how long we are together and even if we are separated due to circ.u.mstances that the truth of what our relationship is, a total commitment, will be there for life. And if you are honest with yourself you will admit that, even if it is just to yourself."

Matthew leant over and gave her another kiss, before moving back and getting ready to get out of bed. Lexi, not wanting him to leave quickly said "Do you want an answer to your question?"

Turning back but sitting up Matthew said "You have no need to answer any question unless you want to. Just know that I will answer any question you ask me except if it is something that you do not have clearance for me to tell you. I do not want you to feel obligated."

"Matthew it is not an obligation. We need to be truthful, because how much hurt has hiding from it caused. I know there would be an easy way for me to get through to you how I feel, but these broken bones mean that it is not an option. The only way I can get through is to talk."

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