Chapter 29

When he had bumped into Ding Wen touching up Yang Lei in the restroom, Fang Yu had only got a look, but with just that one look, Ding Wen retracted his hand. Ding Wen had met many gangsters, but he was a little afraid of the eyes of a gangster like Fang Yu.

“Are you very close with that Ding Wen recently?”

Once, when Yang Lei was about to leave after eating again, Fang Yu couldn’t help but stop him.

“Kind of.”

“What is kind of?”

“Didn’t he help me? We’re just a little close.” In Yang Lei’s memory, Fang Yu had never paid attention to Ding Wen. Why did he ask about Ding Wen?

“…Do you know what kind of person he is?”

Fang Yu asked, holding back the displeasure in his heart.

Yang Lei had a little feeling.

“What kind of person?”

He stared at Fang Yu.

At that time, no other brothers were present. Fang Yu had words to say, and he didn’t want to hold back. Fang Yu furrowed his brows.

“Do you need to ask? You don’t know how he looked at you that day at the table?”

“I know. Isn’t he just the same as Hua Mao?” Yang Lei asked. Fang Yu’s expression of detestation and disgust was like a thorn. It made Yang Lei’s heart very unhappy.

“You know and you’re still close to him? You… don’t feel uncomfortable?”

“What do you mean? Aren’t you also quite close to Hua Mao? Have you ever detested him? Are you uncomfortable?”

Fang Yu hadn’t thought that Yang Lei would use such an aggressive attitude to respond to him. Fang Yu wasn’t happy to begin with. Yang Lei’s attitude made him feel even angrier.

“Are they the same thing? Hua Mao is my brother! He’s laid down his life for me!”

“Ding Wen is my friend now! If he’s ‘that kind of person,’ then he can’t be a friend? Then he makes people uncomfortable? He’s also a person, and he’s worth befriending!”

Yang Lei really didn’t know where so much anger came from, but he couldn’t keep from quarreling with Fang Yu.

Ding Wen was someone who liked men. He was the kind of person who was called “mentally ill” and “not right in the head.” Although even until now, Yang Lei had never equated himself with people like Hua Mao and Ding Wen, he could understand this kind of feeling right now. His views and thoughts had all gradually changed. He would at least respect them, because he himself had also had such feelings.

Although Fang Yu’s disgusted eyes and tone were directed at Ding Wen, Yang Lei felt they seemed to be directed at him. That was the attitude and view that Fang Yu had toward these kinds of people and this matter. Fang Yu completely looked down on them from the bottom of his heart. He had said that was called “uncomfortable!”

“…”

Fang Yu looked at Yang Lei, stunned.

In his memory, this was their first time arguing because of someone other than each other.

Before, they hadn’t even argued because of the large and bloody conflict between Chuan-zi and Xiao Wu, both of whom were their best brothers and relatives.

Fang Yu lowered his head and took a cigarette out of his pocket.

He smoked with his head down and didn’t say anything else.

Yang Lei also didn’t speak. He turned around and left.

Fang Yu raised his head, looking at Yang Lei’s back…

Although Yang Lei definitely didn’t have excessive thoughts toward Ding Wen, after they were close, he felt that Ding Wen was truly not bad. And Ding Wen was clearly different from the people he messed around with all day in the gangster circle. He was a legitimately cultured person, skilled and talented. Many things that he said really opened Yang Lei’s eyes, such as the pagers, cellular phones, and PHS that started to become popular a few years later. Ding Wen understood and knew about them back then.

Ding Wen got many games that could be played with the computer system at that time, floppy disk games and CD games. From installation to operation, he patiently taught Yang Lei little by little. He opened a haven of escape from reality for Yang Lei. Yang Lei plunged headlong into the world of games and became numb.

When Yang Lei went to Ding Wen’s house, he had to pass by the street below Fang Yu’s house and then turn two corners. He was too familiar with walking this path, but now his destination was different. Every time Yang Lei passed by Fang Yu’s house, he had to restrain himself from looking upstairs. There were several times when he walked to the steps where he could go up to the second-floor terrace. He had an impulse to rush up to that terrace, then rush upstairs, but Yang Lei restrained himself and continued to walk forward.

He didn’t know that, on the eighth floor balcony, Fang Yu had actually already seen him many times.

The first time Fang Yu saw Yang Lei walk past, he subconsciously shouted: “Yang Lei!”

Yang Lei didn’t hear and walked past.

Originally, Fang Yu thought that Yang Lei was coming to his house, and he didn’t shout again, but he saw Yang Lei walk straight past the street.

Fang Yu immediately turned around and put on his shoes, going downstairs to chase him. When he went downstairs, he was still thinking that today he just happened to drive a car from the restaurant here. It was parked downstairs. Later, he could bring Yang Lei out for a drive and go somewhere to play…

When Fang Yu chased him to the street, Yang Lei was already about to turn at the corner. Fang Yu chased him to the corner. Just as he turned and was about to shout at Yang Lei, he saw Ding Wen standing far away at the opposite corner, waving at Yang Lei. Yang Lei crossed the road and walked over. The two of them spoke and smiled, entering the front gates of the neighborhood ahead together.

That was the day that Fang Yu knew Ding Wen lived very close to him.

After that day, Fang Yu knew where Yang Lei would go at night now.

It was also after that day that he would often be at the balcony during the evening and see Yang Lei walk past. He never shouted to him again.

No matter how late Yang Lei played, he wouldn’t spend the night at Ding Wen’s place, even though Ding Wen kept urging him to stay.

Although Ding Wen was slow, who could be indifferent towards someone he liked? Ding Wen always looked at Yang Lei tenderly. That gaze was very moving, and Yang Lei could only look away.

Sometimes, Ding Wen would intentionally take Yang Lei’s hand that was holding the mouse and move it. Sometimes, he would get very close to Yang Lei as he was teaching him about the computer, his face almost sticking to Yang Lei’s face.

At this time, Yang Lei would avoid him. If Ding Wen had gone too far, Yang Lei would seriously reject him.

Yang Lei felt guilty in his heart. He knew that he was taking advantage of Ding Wen’s good feelings toward him to find a place to escape. He also felt that this was too unfair to Ding Wen, so he thought that, in a few days, he wouldn’t come again.

But right now, Ding Wen hadn’t just fallen for Yang Lei at first sight. He had already deeply fallen in love with Yang Lei. He almost couldn’t control it. This night, when Yang Lei was concentrating on playing games, Ding Wen who was sitting to the side and looking dazedly at him, couldn’t help but put his hand on Yang Lei’s lower body.

Yang Lei immediately stood up, staring at him.

“If you keep doing this, then I really can’t come over.”

“Lei Ge, I really like you. I can’t control myself.”

Ding Wen said sadly. He liked calling Yang Lei Lei Ge. Actually, Ding Wen was even older than Yang Lei by two years.

“…But I don’t like you.”

Yang Lei knew that the direct truth was very hurtful. But it was better than letting the other hold on to fantasies.

“You really don’t have even a little feeling for me?” Ding Wen said sadly.

Seeing Ding Wen’s gaze, Yang Lei seemed to feel déjà vu. He was also upset.

He thought of Hua Mao’s words.

It was still better to never know some people. Because after you know them, it will add a lot of troubles.

“You are… pretty good. I hope that we are always friends,” Yang Lei said.

Ding Wen was silent for a moment.

“I feel that you are someone who can accept this. Did you reject me because you have someone in your heart?” Ding Wen said.

Yang Lei didn’t reply, silently affirming.

“Is it that Fang Yu?”

Perhaps homosexuals like Ding Wen were all naturally sensitive, especially towards people’s thoughts. Just like when Yang Lei himself still hadn’t figured it out, Hua Mao had directly pointed out that Yang Lei “had thoughts” toward Fang Yu, Ding Wen could also detect from the small details that the person in Yang Lei’s heart was Fang Yu.

“Then does he like you?” Ding Wen asked.

Yang Lei thought that this was a really good question. He wanted to ask, but he still hadn’t asked.

“He and I are just brothers. I also don’t have a chance.”

Yang Lei smiled bitterly and comforted Ding Wen.

“You’re a good person, and you’re knowledgeable. You definitely will find someone who is good to you. Look at me. I’m just a gangster. I haven’t even gone to college.”

Yang Lei went to pick up his bag. He should leave.

But Ding Wen suddenly stood up. Without waiting for Yang Lei to react, he tightly hugged Yang Lei.

“Lei Ge, just give me a hug. Just hug me for a while, I’m begging you.”

Ding Wen’s heart also broke.

“…”

Yang Lei didn’t push him away. He could understand the pain of unrequited love.

That night, Ding Wen truly only hugged Yang Lei. He didn’t do anything else. He begged Yang Lei to stay a little longer and accompany him, even if he were just pitying him.

Yang Lei looked at Ding Wen’s gaze and agreed. They didn’t play any more games. He kept patiently chatting with Ding Wen, until Ding Wen’s mood gradually got better…

This conversation lasted all night. When Yang Lei was about to leave, it was almost 5. The sun was about to rise.

“Don’t leave. Just sleep a while here,” Ding Wen requested.

“No, you should get some rest.” Ding Wen just had a very narrow bed. Yang Lei didn’t want any unnecessary things to occur.

“Then I’ll see you out.”

They went downstairs and walked out of the neighborhood. The sky was still dark outside, and there was already a dim light. Yang Lei walked to the entrance of the neighborhood. He was telling Ding Wen not to see him off and to go back and sleep. Ding Wen was still holding his arm, reluctant to part. Yang Lei told him to go back. When he raised his head, he saw someone standing across the street, and Yang Lei froze.

That day, Fang Yu had stayed at the restaurant all night to handle things. He had stayed up all night before returning. Looking exhausted, he was at the breakfast stall across the street that had opened the earliest to buy something to eat.

He turned around, and saw Yang Lei and Ding Wen walking out from the neighborhood across the street.