Chapter 36 - 36

"I can't say I'm not hurt by all of this. But I'm stronger than you think, Reed. I wish you would have told me all of this and let me make my own choice."

He grasped my hands and squeezed them as if they were his lifeline and he was a drowning man. I understood if that was how he felt at this moment because I felt the same as I looked into his eyes.

"I know you are, little one. One thing I have never doubted, even when I met you three years ago, was how strong and courageous you are. It's killing me to know that I have hurt you at all," he said.

His eyes caressing every section of my face as if it would be the last time that he saw me and he wanted to remember every inch of it. The ache of loss that had just started to go away came back as I realized he was intending to say goodbye to me. I pulled my hands away from his and folded them in my lap. I was afraid that if they were free, I would grab him and beg him not to leave.

I stood up suddenly feeling too agitated to sit still and began to pace back and forth in front of the coffee table. I wrapped one arm around my waist and plucked at my lower lip with the other as my mind ran over what he had said trying to find some hope in his words, some way around the finality of what was happening.

"There's got to be something we can do, Reed," I said frustrated. "It can't just end like this, that's ridiculous."

"What do you want to do, Mia? Continue on as if nothing has happened? Pretend like my ex-wife hasn't come back into the picture at all?" he demanded watching me as I paced.

"Yes!" I cried throwing my hands in the air and turning on him.

The look of shock in his eyes was almost comical. However, in light of the situation, I couldn't blame him. I could hardly believe I was saying this.

"I want to continue, Reed. I barely got a taste of what we can be like together and I have loved every moment of it. I don't want some blonde bimbo to come waltzing in here and destroy all that we've found in an instant. I refuse to let her ruin another moment, another second of the time I have with you."

He dropped his head down and stared at the floor in front of him, his silence once again leaving me feeling uncomfortable and nervous that he had just been stringing me along and now that I found out about his game, he was trying to find excuses to leave me.

"Are you sure you want to continue this? Because there is no way we can be together publicly," he said quietly, his voice muffled nevertheless I heard the hope and that was all I needed to hear.

I slowly and deliberately walked over to him and knelt on the floor beside him like he had taught me to. I had a moment of regret at my decision to put on the most repugnant pantsuit I owned this morning. I had done it with the specific purpose of pissing Reed off. Now here I was stuck trying to play the sexy submissive in an outfit even a model couldn't look sexy in. But Reed did not seem to care. The surge of lust in his eyes as they latched on to me was unmistakable.

"Yes, Master. I want to continue, I understand that you can't be completely mine, but for now, I'll take what I can get. Just tell me that you have no interest in her beyond getting rid of her in your life," I begged him.

I was hoping he didn't notice the quake in my voice that denoted fear at the thought that he was not being totally honest about his feelings towards her. A selfish part of me wanted all his interest centered directly on me, I tried to push it aside, but it kept eating at me to make sure I was the only one he wanted.

"I swear it, Mia. I cannot stand that woman to even look at me much less touch me. I swear on my life, I want only you."

His words were so sincerely spoken I immediately believed him with my whole heart. Satisfied and happy with his response I dropped my head on his knee and closely watched his reaction to my submissive pose. His pleased smile was all the praise I needed as he reached forward and began to caress my face.

"You really are a wonderful sub, little one," he said softly with contentment in his voice.

I raised my head and smiled at him showering him with my pleasure at his praise. With a gentle but firm grip on my chin, Reed leaned forward and kisses me ravenously. The pleasure immediately rose inside me causing me to whimper and lean forward trying to get closer. He whispered a harsh curse against my lips as he swooped down and lifted me onto his lap causing me to straddle him. I wrapped my arms around his neck for leverage as I opened my mouth and allowed our tongues to meet in a frenzy. His whole body demanding my submission and mine gladly giving it in a heartbeat. In the same swift movement, he suddenly pulled back and began kissing his way down my neck even as he whispered words of warning.

"Sweet little sub, I regret to say I forgot to bring any protection."

"That's fine, Master. I promise I am safe," I whispered to him gripping him tight.

"Thank god!" he groaned out.

He sat me next to him on the couch and with quick, jerking movements he began pulling his shirt out of his pants.

"I can't wait another second.. Two days was too long to go without my sub," he said harshly as his hands reaching for his zipper.