Chapter 148 - 3.44

"Of course I care about you and him... Because..." He Yiyuan paused as he processed his thoughts clearly. He shook his head, cursing at himself for almost having trapped himself in an unsalvageable situation. "Never mind. I was just curious. Do you not have a clear answer for that? Are you still testing the waters with him?"

"Is it not enough that you purposely ripped us apart from each other? He Yiyuan, I'm not stupid. Do you think I haven't noticed what your insinuations mean?" Xu Jiaqi raised her volume. "You are so painfully obvious that it would take a dumbass to not understand."

He Yiyuan clearly held feelings towards Xu Jiaqi, but always held himself back for various reasons. There was no way that Xu Jiaqi would accept him. It took Zenith a life sacrifice until she was finally moved to care about him not just because the mission was there, but also because she wanted to.

Who was He Yiyuan? He was a great candidate in the eyes of other people, but not her.

She couldn't care less about him, who didn't relate to her mission, and also wasn't the one tied to her mysterious past.

"For a decisive person like you, you sure are taking your sweet time.. Are you sure that you are serious about him? Xu Jiaqi.. No, Qiqi, you are young, you have great potential, and you are extremely precious. There's nothing that ties you down to him. Nothing that tells you that you have to be with him. Why is it that you're so.. dead set on accompanying him?"

He Yiyuan looked like a lot of things were stuck in his throat. He gazed at Xu Jiaqi with hope that the words that would come out of her mouth was of favor to his cause.

"...Well, whether I'm serious or not, it's both a yes and a no. It depends on the surprise that I will receive when I go back to Xian Ruo, hm? I made a promise with him. For the second question.. That's my own private matter that I don't think I have to tell you. He Yiyuan, I'm going to say this because I value you as a friend. Don't think that much of me. I'm not someone you can touch. Not even Xie Yongrui can touch me if I don't wish for it to happen. I'm my own person, and I want you to know that by acting like this all the time, all that's going to happen is me disappearing permanently from your life."

"On the other side, if you choose to step back and comprehend what you got yourself into, then I will pretend like all of this never happened. I will give you time to distance away so that you can forget about me. I will go back to Xian Ruo, and in the future, everything would be back to normal, and there will be no hard feelings between us. We've been acquainted for five years. Do you truly wish for all that to be broken down and teared apart?"

Xu Jiaqi had to draw the line. The line that would constantly remind He Yiyuan that he mustn't forget his position and standing. That he wasn't as important as he longed to be in her mind.

"...Go back, huh? Are you desperate to go back? You have lived in my kingdom for.. About five years at this point. As this land's Ruler, I want to ask you about your opinions of this place." He Yiyuan had a tricky gaze in his eyes as he asked.

Xu Jiaqi was cautious as to what He Yiyuan had in mind, but she answered his question nonetheless.

"...Well, as far as I'm concerned, I spent time in the Empire. And from what I've personally seen and observed, this place is much better than that gross place. I can't even begin to describe how broken it is. And the reason for it... I can't exactly pinpoint one reason, but a major part of it has something to do with the Ruler who is struggling to keep himself in check. It's a case of someone who didn't know how large of a piece they could bite."

Five years had passed. Added on to the first year Xu Jiaqi spent in this world, it meant that she had watched over this world for approximately six years.

In that period of time, she was heavily involved in literally every single huge cause in this world. Be it politics, military, economy, culture, everything that happened in the lands, she was roughly aware in every single one of them. Not to mention, she had the assistance of the System, so she was literally a walking encyclopedia.

She had learned a lot, and was forced to open her eyes to the perfect example of a bad Ruler. The Empire's state was the result of nobody else's work but the current Emperor.

"Qiqi, if you ally yourself with me, in the future, the Land of Xi might not.. No, it won't stay as a Kingdom. The second Empire doesn't have to be Xian Ruo." He Yiyuan spoke. "The Empress' position is vacant, my dear."

"...I will say it once again. He Yiyuan, I have no intentions of doing so. Cease your pointless words right now, or I will leave and go back to Xian Ruo right now. I believe that five years of work was enough to impact Xian Ruo the way I wished for it to be when I first came here. My lord.. Rui is a capable person. Under his hands, I have heard of nothing but positive intakes on Xian Ruo's development. I'm alright with going back right now."

Somehow, rather than feeling happy, she felt disgusted more than anything else.

Not because she loathed He Yiyuan's affection, but because he proclaimed all of this so easily, and yet she struggled to make up her mind about the smallest things ever when it came to her emotions.

He did it so casually, not hesitating to make big decisions that would cost him more than an arm and a leg.

But her? She hesitated on everything. Because the concept of emotions was somehow strangely foreign to her from the start.

But after meeting 'the soul'..

A change did happen to her.

Was it something to rejoice over, though?