Chapter 260 - The Key

Delaney and Miles spent most of their day recovering from the night before.  To avoid any more rumors they stayed out of Delaney's bedroom, instead spending their time down in the sitting room or outside in the fresh air.  It had cost Miles a good sum of coins to keep the servants quiet about their sleeping arrangement and even that wasn't guaranteed to work so they didn't want to give them any more material for their rumors.

Delaney couldn't keep herself from being bitter that they had to care at all.  If Vincent hadn't sent her away then the servants would think twice before spreading rumors about the wealthiest duke in the kingdom or his duchess.  Not to mention she and Miles wouldn't have ever been in that position in the first place.

She would have gone to the card club with her wickedly handsome husband and enjoyed the evening with him.  She wouldn't have needed to drink so much wine to numb the pain in her heart and quiet her thoughts.  They would have been together and happy.

It hadn't been long after Delaney woke up before thoughts of Vincent crept into her mind again.  She felt the familiar ache settling into her heart and a feeling like she was so fragile she might simply shatter at any moment.

Miles tried to keep her spirits up but they were both still a bit sick and tired from their night.  He played cards with her but they were dozing off so he had the servants lay blankets out on the grass in the shade.  They went and each stretched out across a blanket, propped up on pillows, and talked until they dozed off.

Without the wine blanketing her mind, Delaney's dreams of Vincent came back.  With the warm spring air, she usually dreamt about their days alone at the ocean house.  Almost just as often though her dreams were simply of the two of them together.  Sometimes they would be curled up in bed talking, sometimes outside watching the horses in the fields.

Today her dreams were of them simply sitting together in the dining room talking and having breakfast.  She would glance at him and he would look up and smile at her.

His handsome smile with his sparkling green eyes.

Delaney came awake and for a moment her heart nearly stopped.  Those lovely green eyes weren't a dream.  They were real and looking at her with worry.

She blinked and realized they weren't the same eyes though and the face wasn't the one she longed for it to be.

"Are you alright?" Miles asked in concern, "You... You're crying."

Delaney reached up and felt her cheeks, realizing he was right.  Embarrassed, she quickly scooted back and turned away from him.

"I'm fine," she said over her shoulder as she used her palms to wipe the tears away, "I'm sorry I woke you up."

Miles stared at her, "Delaney..."

"I want to go back to the club tonight," she cut him off before he could deliver more pity, "It was fun having the night out with you and Constance and I want to do it again."

Miles frowned, "I don't know..."

"Please," she turned back around now that she had fixed her face, "Please Miles can we go back?  I just want to have a little more time with you both before you go back to your lives."

"We're not going away and forgetting you, you know," he tried to explain, "You are still Cora and Constance's best friend, and no matter what you will be a sister to me.  You can always come and stay with us or with Constance and Bernard.."

"And see how happy all of you are with the ones you love?  See the happy lives you get to have together?  That sounds lovely.  I will be the sad spinster aunt who's husband sent her away."

"Delaney..."

"You don't have to go tonight," she got to her feet, feeling the tears stinging in her eyes, "I'll go on my own."

She turned then and walked quickly inside before he caught her crying again, ignoring him as he called for her to stop.  She rushed up the stairs back to the safety of her bedroom.  Closing the door behind her she locked it as well, not wanting to deal with anyone.  Maybe it would be better if she just went back to hiding in her room alone.

No, she wouldn't do that.  She had discovered the secret to escaping the pain in her heart.  Wine could drown it and spending the night out with her friends at the club had kept her mind too busy to think about it.  That's what she had to do.  Maybe if she did it long enough she would one day manage to outrun the heartbreak.

-

That evening Ms. Bird was thrilled to help Delaney dress for another evening out.  Delaney hadn't spoken to Miles since their time outside so she didn't know if he was going or not.  Either way, she knew she was going to go.  Constance would still be there so she wouldn't be alone.

The maid had had a chance to take in one of her mistress's dresses so now it fit her smaller figure.  Delaney stood in front of the mirror with her hair done up nicely and a deep blue gown that now looked good on her.  Well not quite good.  Even Delaney could see that she looked too skinny.  She was sort of bony now.

It didn't matter though.  She didn't care about impressing anyone.  The only person in the world whose opinion of her mattered didn't want to see her.

Delaney pushed away the painful thought and left her bedroom.  Walking down the stairs she felt a wave of relief when she saw Miles leaning against the doorframe, an unamused look on his face.

"You knew I wasn't going to let you go alone," he commented as he took her on his arm.

"You could have."

"Yes well, then who would keep you out of trouble?"

Delaney smirked at him now, "Miles Adair haven't you learned there isn't anyone who can truly keep me out of trouble?"

He rolled his eyes but smiled at her and they were fine again as if their conversation that afternoon hadn't happened.

-

Constance was happy to see them return but Sam and the servers were probably even happier since Miles had paid them all so well.

Delaney had wine in her hand within a few minutes of walking through the door.  She immediately took a drink and felt herself looking forward to getting to the point the liquid would wash away her heartache.

Constance took them to the dining room where this time they actually had dinner first.  A group of musicians was on the stage playing a lively tune and for a moment Delaney was reminded of the pirates and her time at the Captain's estate.

She absently touched the scar on her palm and found herself wondering again where Ian was and if he was alright.  There had still been no news from him or any of the ships sent to look for Mason and the others.  She hoped they were alright.

As selfish as it might have been, Delaney wished Ian would return and come to stay with her.  She missed having her best friend and he was the only person in the world she wanted to talk to about things with Vincent.  He was the only person she thought might understand.

Even if his family was discovered alive and well though she knew it would still be cruel to ask him to come to stay with her.  He loved her in a way she could never love him back.  So instead she would have to deal with the pain on her own.

Or not deal with it at all, which was her plan for this evening.

Much like the night before, the wine flowed and money was lost at the card tables.  The three friends laughed until tears streamed down their cheeks and they felt like they might pop.

Unlike the night before though, Delaney now knew the key to keeping her thoughts of Vincent away.  Wine and Distraction.  She sought out both, buying rounds of drinks for everyone at the club as well as convincing Miles and other men to dance with her to the music.

The card club became a wild party and at the center of it all was Duchess Delaney Adair.  All types of men and women saw her behavior and she knew the gossip would fly but she didn't care.  None of it could hurt her.  Vincent had already hurt her more than any gossip could.

When Miles convinced her to leave that night it was even later than the night before and she had had even more to drink.  He helped her into the carriage and then helped her out of it again a short time later when he stopped it so she could be sick.

He got her to her room and into bed with the help of a maid who had been put in charge of waiting up for them.

"We'll have to have a quiet night at home tomorrow after all this," Miles had chuckled before telling her goodnight.

Delaney hadn't agreed to that though because she had no intentions of staying home the next night or possibly any night after for a long time.

As long as she was out and distracted she didn't think of Vincent and as long as she didn't think of Vincent she didn't hurt.