Chapter 181: Stop using me as your pawn

"Ra… Rum... Rum…" 

Her voice is soft and melodic, disturbing the silence while carrying a certain silence with her eyes closed and her arms are widespread; long sleeves presenting an illusion of wings as she floats in a timeless horizon. 

"Rum… Ra… Ra… Rum… Rum…" She hums a tune. "Nah… Nah… Nah… Oh, it was all in vain."

A chuckle in the darkness. Someone asks, "What was?"

"My redemption." Kresi doesn't open her eyes. "Oh, I can never be redeemed of my sins.. I am…"

Another laughter. 

"It breaks slowly." Kresi lifts her hand that is not supposed to be there. "Then again, it's surprising that I managed to survive Qeshaya."

"What do you mean?" The voice is childish and mocking. "Do you know something that I don't?"

"Shayera, Quinn, Rui, Mirai, Pebby, Gabriel," She says the names of everyone she met in her two long lives. "Ai, and Aren,"

"What about them?"

Kresi places the back of her hand on the cold water lightly, letting the cold seep into her skin. Slowly, Slowly… the sense of scent returns to her. The place is not that quiet. Her heart doesn't beat. Her lungs don't breathe. Though her eyes are closed, she still sees everything. 

"They are temporary," She whispers, staring at the eternal dark sky. "They passed by me, meant to be lost in the flow of time."

"Do you know who you are now?" The voice questions her.

Silence creeps, stalking her, tiptoeing around her. The voice diminishes into the darkness. Kresi looks neither old nor young. Time doesn't touch her anymore. Free from the cycle of life and death, she floats in oblivion.

"I am the chaotic will of the true one," Kresi mumbles. "I am the first face of chaos."

And she has always been the harbinger of chaos while being chaos herself. Anything that she touched has ended up in chaos: the end of Iravan that she wanted because of Jase's death and that ending that became the reason for new Iravan. 

"And who was she?" The voice questions her after a long time.

"Oh, I know her well." Kresi sighs. "Something that the true one created to stop me. An annoying one, she is"

From the endless horizon, a silver light emerges, heading in her direction. As it moves through the black water, disturbing the tranquillity of the black sea, causing waves running in her direction, the silver light seems to take the form of a man as it gets nearer to Kresi. His hair is bright silver. He brings four small flames behind him.

Chaos sits up, watching him quietly. The man in the white robe sits down on his knees. The four flames transform into four spirits. Following the man's action, they also bow before Kresi.

"You are one of my faces." Chaos tilts her head. There's a certain disinterest in her eyes. "What have you been doing while I was gone?"

He raises his head and meets her gaze. "My lord, I have been waiting for you to come back."

"Is that so?" She lets out a chuckle. "Do you think that you can hide it from me? Ryou? Is that the name you go by?"

The fake rain god, Ryou, purses his lips. The spirits behind him tremble as Chaos's cold gaze falls on them one by one. Ryou lowers his head and says, "My lord, that's just… I thought that it would be better if I take care of her. She has ruined your plans many times."

"You were trying to help me?" Chaos chortles. "How annoying! I go away for a while and one of my little faces start doing things on his own. Did you expect me to never return, Ryou?"

The silence in the darkness laughs. The sky cracks and the light seeps into the realm of chaos. Bubbles rise in the dark water. The water is sinking. The spirits realize that something is wrong. 

Sosuri, Gama, Kozo, and Ame Onna find themselves sinking with the water. They raise their head, wailing for mercy. The primal face of Chaos, Chaos herself, watches them with emotionless eyes. What is mercy? Chaos doesn't acknowledge it. It's not something she's born to do. She's Chaos, the chaotic will of the true one, the first face of chaos, and the only one that matters.

When he looks up, he finds her sitting on a white throne. Built from the chaotic energy, this throne has not been seen since Chaos was gone. The throne of chaos will only allow true chaos to sit in that place.

The black water along with the four spirits are gone. The floor is replaced by white cold marble. The sky is a white canvas. The perfect silence seems to suck all the noise, including the sound of Ryou's breathing.

True chaos is silent indeed.

Ryou swallows his saliva. The true face of Chaos is offended. After all, he did something without her permission. 

"Darkness chose to go to Iravan." Chaos utters with a discontented voice, "I decided to follow him. And look, I nearly managed to do it all over again and then, she came, like always, interfering with my plans. It's rather sad, isn't it? I always love to see how she tries so hard to bring order and peace to my disorder."

He folds his fingers on his knees. "Forgive me, my lord."

"She and I balance each other." Chaos clicks her tongue. "Or so the true one likes to believe. However, she was born as a mortal face of a god. She and I would have met again and again. This is an endless cycle. As long as I exist, she will also exist."

Ryou blinks his eyes when he hears that. "You mean?"

"The river of death is nothing for another will of the true one." Chaos stands up and climbs down the steps, walking to Ryou who squeezes his eyes shut. 

"Even I don't know what she will become." Chaos places her hand on Ryou's neck. "You have done such an unnecessary thing."

"Don't, please don't kill me," Ryou begs softly. "Lord, please have mercy on me. I only wanted to help you."

"Rather." Her fingers press against his pulse on his neck. Her eyes remain unchanging, aloof yet smiling. "You were afraid that she might become an obstacle in your plans. You weren't half-wrong. After all, she was sent in that world to stop the next cycle of chaos."

Ryou looks up at her hopefully. "My lord, I did it because I was carrying your work."

She runs her fingers through his silver hair. "You are one of my faces. If you don't carry my work, then what would you be doing?"

"I…" Ryou opens his mouth to apologize to her again. However, he never finishes his words. Chaos darts her hand into his mouth and grabs his tongue. He widens his eyes, asking for pity. 

"Nevertheless, you shouldn't have touched something that was meant for me to deal with." Chaos pulls out his tongue in the next instant, tearing it out of his mouth. "This is for the lies you told."

No matter what, Ryou can't scream or move. She grabs his wrists and twists his arms before she presses her foot on his chest, cracking his bones. "You have been working for a long time, haven't you? It's time for you to rest. Since you are a part of me, I will take you back -- after I have punished you for your nosy deeds." 

By the time she's done with the punishment, bits and pieces of Ryou's existence are lying on the cold floor. She walks back to her throne and takes a seat. Small fragments from the cold marble floor rise in the air and glimmer a dark light before flowing into her. 

Chaos looks at the distance. The river of death appears in her sight. 

Nothing is left of Ari's body. Her existence is lying at the bottom of the river, surrounded by the forsaken creatures who are feeding on her. 

"Don't you wish for death, my brave friend?" Chaos inquires softly. "Don't I wish for death sometimes? But the primordial god of death is a funny one. He chases the mortals who cheat death, and he ignores the ones who desperately seek death, Ari."

What will she do? Chaos closes her eyes, propping her head under her hand. 

"Maybe she will go back and play happily with her family." Chaos snorts. "It would have been better if Adira found her and turned her immortal."

But that one has turned this into such a face. "Did you send me here to remind me of my true self, Sister?"

The woman manifests in front of her. She has taken the face of the person who was her mother once, Mayaeira Mirin. She says nothing to her.

"You don't have a face of your own." Chaos' eyes darken. "Still, you don't even take care of your mortal's face."

"Both of you are my faces." Mayaeira lets out a sigh. "Both of you need me."

"Primordial goddess of energy." Chaos shakes her head. "But you took her side this time."

"Her will was stronger than yours." Mayaeira sneers at her. "Does it hurt your pride, Mayhem?"

To cause mayhem, one needs power. To bring order, one still needs power. The primordial goddess of energy is the only goddess who exists in its primal form. She has no face or a form. She can exist in someone's consciousness, someone's source, someone's will, or someone's sight. 

Mayhem grimaces at her. "Stop using me as your pawn for your amusement."