322 I call it bullsh?t.

Katherine ambled towards her bed in self-contained strides. Her eyes rapidly blinked and she stared agape at the man who was casually sprawled across her bed like a king who owned the space. He laid on his stomach with his legs and arms on the side, occupying the entire king-sized bed.

"What are you doing?" she finally managed to ask again as she stood by the bed and hovered over him.

Damien had his eyes closed as he responded to her, "I'm going to sleep." His voice was rough and sounded lazy.

"I can see that." She scanned his body from head to toe and back up again. "But why in my bed? You have your own house to go home to."

"I already slept here last night, what's another night?"

"Y-You slept here?!"

Damien's eyes fluttered open and he stared straight at her, his voice dropping low, "You didn't let go of me. What do you think?"

Narrowing her eyes, Katherine hugged herself when she suddenly felt defensive. She had no idea what happened after they talked last night as she already fell asleep. "What do you mean I didn't let go of you? I did no such thing!"

"Are you calling me a liar then?" he challenged, locking his gaze with hers. "You didn't know how much I sacrificed last night. I told you I wasn't going to touch you and I even kept my distance but you held on so tightly and clung on to me. What was I supposed to do when you took advantage of me?"

Katherine let out a nervous laugh. She could not believe the nerve of this man accusing her of something she couldn't possibly have done. She didn't, did she? That's impossible.

She swallowed and stammered, "Y-You're becoming too comfortable in here, Damien. Why don't you—"

"It's too far to go home. And I'm too tired to move. Do you honestly want me gone?"

Indeed, Damien had been through a lot tonight. And going back home to Pearl Gardens would be a long drive. And truthfully, she didn't want him gone. It's just... 

Before she could even say anything, he reached for her wrist and tugged her down to the bed in one swift move. She yelped in surprise and her heart raced as he suddenly caged her body with his, trapping her in his arms… and legs. "Damien!" she cried.

He squinted his eyes as he turned off the lamp on the nightstand and shushed her, "Shh… you're too noisy."

"Let me go. Why are you doing this?" She tried to wiggle her way out but he wasn't letting her escape.

"It's revenge. I'm taking advantage of you just like how you did to me last night," he spoke above her head, secretly grinning as he closed his eyes, stroking her back as though he was trying to calm her down.

Feeling as though it was pointless to fight it, Katherine exhaled a long sigh. Damien was being relentless and though she was trying to 'distance' herself from him, she thought she could let this go. It's not as if they hadn't spent the night together before.

"Fine. But no funny business." She clicked her tongue and felt him loosen his arms around her.

He pulled back just enough so that the two of them could see each other face to face. They gazed at each other for a while in the darkness of the room with only the moon shining from the night sky outside, the glass walls surrounding her room allowing the dim light to enter.

"Come back to me," he breathed.

Hearing his plea, Katherine could sense the sincerity in his words. She felt the pleasure of his touch and their closeness at the moment. During the time that they were apart, she had the feeling of emptiness. But now… right at this very moment, she felt safe in his arms and she felt whole. 

Just when she realized this, a sudden pang of guilt stabbed her heart once again. The familiar prick caused her to lower her gaze and swallow, wanting to distance herself from him but at the same time, not wanting to. Being in his embrace just felt so right and so wrong at the same time.

"What are you thinking? Please talk to me… No more secrets…" he appealed.

Katherine balled her hands into fists and he noticed when she turned rigid, wondering what was going on with her at the moment.

He lifted her chin with his fingers, forcing her to look at him in the eye, wanting to know what she was so afraid of. "Please?"

After contemplating, Katherine finally told him, "You really want to know?" She saw him lightly nod before she continued, "I don't know how to be with you… I really want to… But I can't…"

His jaw clenched, and he was afraid to ask but he did it anyway. "Do you hate me that much?"

She grimaced and her lips slightly trembled. "I couldn't… I don't… I think I should but I couldn't."

"So then why?"

She had to swallow the huge lump in her throat and stop herself from shedding tears, so her eyes stung and her throat hurt. "Because you're a constant reminder of that night. I know you didn't harm my parents and I know you saved me. But you're also the reason why I'm still alive… While my parents aren't. I should have died that night with them."

Seeing the pained look on her face, Damien knew that until now, she was suffering from survivor's guilt. Katherine was struggling because of the fact that she was saved from that tragedy while her parents didn't survive. She was feeling remorseful and by being with him, she would always be reminded about that night when everything changed in her life. And it didn't help that he was connected to the people who were hired to assassinate her family. It was truly a pitiful situation for both of them.

Not knowing what to say, he could only pull her close and press his forehead to hers. He had already said his apologies before… and saying them again felt like it wouldn't make a difference. He just wished that he could do something for her so that she wouldn't feel so miserable anymore.

Was he supposed to leave her so that she won't be constantly reminded of the pain of that night anymore? Would that help her at all?

But he didn't want to. Call him selfish, but he really didn't want to part with her. She was his lifeline. They said, 'If you love someone, set them free'... 

"I call it bullshît."

Katherine was taken aback by his sudden cursing. "What?"

"People said that if you love someone, you should set them free…" he repeated what he thought in his head verbally for her to understand. "But I call it bullshît."

She didn't say anything, waiting for him to continue what he wanted to say.

"If you let go of the one you love, you're not being a hero. You're being a coward. I'm going to fight for us, Katherine. Even if I'm the only one fighting. There is no way that I can let go of you. So I call that saying bullshît. I'm staying, whether you like it or not."

Katherine's heart rammed in her chest upon hearing his declaration. Damien's words always made an impact on her but this declaration he told her just now was so stubborn yet so sweet at the same time that she just couldn't help but feel touched.

"Do you understand?" he probed when she didn't respond.

She sighed and told him, "Just hold me."

And he did. He held her tighter.