CH 75.1

“What’s up with this? The door’s locked to the toilet, is it broken?”

“It shouldn’t be, we were still using it yesterday, no?”

“Who cares, just ram it open. We won’t make it in time for the public square dancing otherwise. I’ve got this brand new straw hand fan here, I’ll be giving it a good whirl.”

“Ram it open, go, I’m not gonna be able to hold it in much longer, oof——”

The aunties outside the door sound exasperated.

The little CEO inside the door is all shaky.

It is no longer just an issue of two grown men sneaking into the female bathroom and locking the door…

It is the issue of, one grown man, carrying another grown man, with blood all over his nether regions, rushing out of the female toilet…

Never mind their reputation, but this late at night, what if they were so bloody they spooked the elderly into illness?

While they’re all questioning life here, the aunties’ heave-hos of ramming on the bathroom door has begun.

Ding ding dong dong pong pong dung dung.

It’s surprisingly rhythmic?

Murong Jihua, whose brain has never once been dedicated to more wholesome thoughts for centuries, is overdriving itself, the nerve endings all shooting forth electrons like greased lightning, rushing from his prefrontal cortex to the cones and rods of his eyeballs——Where he suddenly has designs for the female dresses He Jünle has tucked away.

“…”

He Jünle,

You’re the man, man.

Auntie A, holding a pink hand fan for dancing “what a strong lock!”

Auntie B, bringing her decorative headbands “strong, but not as strong as us sisters’ wills together, which can even snap gold! Aight!——Three——Two——One!”

The last ‘One’ was going to be followed by the group of aunties’ white legs rushing for the shaky bathroom door,

When they are stopped, seeing the doors fly open from the inside instead.

That is the day, when the aunties recall——

Once, the days that they were held hostage by ‘Thirty Minutes of Gossipping’ (TL: A parody on ’60 Minutes,’ I think, but I’m not sure), or by ‘Weibo’s Secret Files.’

——They see one burly (?), tall, short-haired woman with a white dress, carrying another equally tall woman whose lower body——is practically drenched in blood——rushing out from the building!

The burly woman has quite the unappealingly rough voice, yelling out with a slightly intentionally cracked voice,

“Move! Good sis’ first period ever, ah! We didn’t bring tampons!”

——Before the aunties could react, ‘she’ dashes forth with the woman in her embrace, still adding to her acting as she runs,

“Oh, Le-er, Le-er! You’re that age already, but why wouldn’t you listen to your Hua-jiejie and take tampons with you?! Look, your dress is all wet! What am I supposed to even tell mom!”

Auntie A “…”

Auntie B “…”

Aunties C, D, E… “…”

He Jünle, currently playing dead “…”

Nope, he can’t hold it in anymore.

He Jünle can’t help but open one eye and, while he’s being tossed around inside Murong Jihua’s embrace, he is also teasing him.

“Jihua, even if one day, I have passed away, I’m sure you can still damned wake me up laughing from inside my coffin…”

‘Pat.’

Murong Jihua, whose face looks more contorted in pain than ever, has closed up He Jünle’s eyes again with his hand immediately, saying, “no, I can’t!”

He lowers his head, and with this extreme sadness in his voice, goes,

“Ah! Lele, you’ll be fine! Don’t be silly, we will definitely be together forever even if the Heavens shall rend and the Earth shall crack and the ostrich shall lay eggs; we will never separate!”

He Jünle “…”

To be perfectly honest, Murong Jihua is not in appropriate attire to get a taxi——Carrying some unconscious person while the both are drenched in blood, the kind that the policemen will want to get involved in if they were seen in public or in any form of public transport;

Fortunately for them, Central Plaza, per its name, is not far from Central Hospital. Also, the sun has just set, but the streetlamps haven’t turned on just yet.

It was a miracle they didn’t cause any sort of mass hysteria event.

The old Director of Central Hospital, is respected for his morals and ethics, for his wisdom and decisiveness.

His usual hobbies are,

Research, Operations, Money-counting, Q&As, receiving banners of honour.

Although he got his entire brain washed by that unreasonable CEO Murong the last time around, but that’s alright. Humans do not feel troubled if they have bad enough memories.

The old Director is standing in front of the tall French windows installed in his office, holding a cup of coffee, enjoying it while also thinking to himself,

‘Hahaha this old man has almost forgotten that thing from last time in favour of the good and lovely science! Hmph, that brat even forced an old man to admit a pregnant boyfriend… what an insult to the elderly!’

He takes another sip of coffee, thinking again,

‘If I see the brat the next time, I must educate him well on the brilliance of our advances in biological science——Mmph?!’

The old Director is sure his eyes are playing a trick on him,

So he rubs his eyes, to focus again,

And rubs his eyes again, to observe with a telescope,

“…

CEO Murong why the hell are you here to disturb the peace of this old man with your man again!!!”

What else could he do,

But forget all the happy things he just said, and head downstairs to receive them?

——If your memory is bad enough, then facepalms wouldn’t ever hurt.

The old Director has arranged for the top level medical professionals to send CEO Murong’s dearest little love into the operating room.

As expected of professionals with standards, that even seeing Murong Jihua’s farcical female getup and He Jünle’s bloodied clothes on his lower body, the medical staff merely twitch their eyes in unison, but say nothing else.

The medical staff would like to say – we are professionally trained to never laugh no matter how laughable the situation is, unless we can’t hold it in.

——Then, the very self-anointed obedient old Director has the other staff dismissed, dragging Murong Jihua over to a quiet spot to ask,

“Murong, bro, this time… what is the sickness you need your lover afflicted with?”

Murong Jihua “…”

That sounds awfully unlike what he wants to happen.

The old Director is smiling so much his wrinkles are deepening, saying, “whether it’s miscarriage, a second, concurrent pregnancy, or a bad cancerous tumour, you need only order and it’s my funeral if I can’t produce a relevant medical report.”

Murong Jihua nods, telling him, “accidental miscarriage, thank you.”

The old Director answers, “oh oh, miscarriage, sure sure, miscarry, mis…”

“…”

He doesn’t understand them young whippersnappers these days!

Is it some kind of romantic play to toy with their elders?!

Anyway, in any case,

Under the professional inspections held by the old Director, whose dedication to medicine and human physiology is renowned and respected,

He Jünle, has successfully miscarried after his pregnancy.

Congratulations, what a perfect ending.