CH 5

A late-night tea party.

Late, the late in ‘late, stunted development’;

Night, the night in ‘Subculture nights’; (TL: A reference to how more non-mainstream expressions of appearance tend to appear after dark)

Tea, the tea in ‘green tea bitch‘;

Party, the party in ‘I don’t know how to party.’

In this mysterious late-night tea party, the rainbow-coloured imagination is painting recklessly all over this Non-Newtonian worldview.

It is most notable in these aspects——

The decoration that reminds people of fairy tales,

It looks like an art project exhibition as organised by five-year-olds.

Murong Jihua is thinking: So, in this other world, there really are bishoujos with eyes the size of half their faces.

On the fashion catwalk (TL: ???) in the tea party, the pretty girls are competing to walk their best walks and twerk their best twerks. There are enough flying kisses directed down at them for twice the population of Earth.

Meanwhile, for the nobles talking, those who are talking business continue to talk business; those who are admiring pretty girls continue to admire. The air is filled with a sense of glee (TL: An edited adaptation of a famous sentence from Kong Yiji by author Lu Xun, where the sentence is used to sarcastically mock and pity some regrettable development).

Yet, no matter how the various colours and clothes flutter about up on the stage, CEO Murong is unmoved:

Naïve!

Even if this is where I shall commit a meet-cute with the female lead, it will never be in such a form!

For one simple reason: Have you ever seen a plot where the white lotus female lead will actively try to seduce the tall, rich and handsome?

Ho, you bunch of corny walking collections of make-up, can never be my beloved little white lotus.

He concludes with a face that’s about to cry, that fairy tales are all lies.

Thinking ‘he might meet the female lead,’ our Murong Jihua has waddled all around the tea party grounds for several hours, yet besides men and abstract depictions of the female species, he has failed to encounter anyone else.

——Mr ‘Trying-his-best-to-hold-it-in’ CEO could almost come out of the closet like this.

If nothing else, after bombarding his eyes for so long, any men would look extremely pleasing and attractive to him.

——Until, finally, in a corner of the party, he meets with this ‘Su Xiaomo’ who is in a simple maid attire.

Who, with a face full of fantastical tears of diamonds, is serving a plate of wine with shaky steps, and crashes right into Murong Jihua.

I’m sorry. I apologise. I suddenly feel that those corny walking collections of make-up are actually pretty nice.

Murong Jihua so thinks with quite the brilliant facial expression, as he examines the working-class little girl in a short, black and white dress, and with an expression of abject despair on her face, on which more than half the space is taken up by two big sparkling Carslan eyes (TL: Apparently a reference to a popular Chinese celebrity with really big eyes and long eyelashes).

His reason tells him:

Su + Xiaomo + late grand entrance + white lotus appearance + the unique aura that is completely a misfit among the previously mentioned cheap vixens + crashing into the male protagonist right on her debut…

= Female lead.

His emotion tells him:

…

I think liking men is a better idea. At least, they have normally proportioned appearances, wouldn’t you agree?

Seriously, if only he’d completely bent over backwards into a mosquito coil (TL: A very curly thing. Curly is the opposite of straight) and thus he is actually transmigrating into a BL game instead to capture other men.

Finally, his survival instincts overtake his pride.

As Murong Jihua takes a deep breath, and then clamps down on Su Xiaomo’s chin hard, giving her a very ‘bewitching smile,’ as he says,

“Ho, so damned sweet a woman you are. You shall be my purchase for sure.”