Chapter 1114 Trying To Find Closure

As thought-provoking as they were, Eren's words were elusive.

Yet he said them with conviction because they were his version of the truth. It allowed the rankers to draw their own conclusions from his words.

If Becky was here, she would have pointed out to Eren that he wasn't really answering Renita's question but confusing all of them with profundities instead. But fortunately or unfortunately, Becky could no longer indulge in banter with Eren about various things.

Eren took a long breath before concluding the matter.

"When she was alive, I dared to say this. I certainly won't hesitate to say it again after her death, no matter how callus it makes me look.

The truth is that Becky was too scared about the future. She ultimately got paralyzed at the sight of overwhelming adversity, which ended up taking her life.

Don't get me wrong. There's nothing wrong with feeling fear. I have said it before and I will say it again. The amount of fear I have felt is greater than all your shares combined.

But when fear starts dictating your every action, then maybe it is time you rethink your life as a ranker in this world. It is okay to feel overwhelmed by your adversities. But if you can't bounce back from the feelings of despair, then your survival holds no meaning."

Eren looked down at the valley beneath his feet and stared at it for a while before continuing.

"Becky's death teaches us that we can't take things for granted. And that nobody is totally infallible.

Don't let fear stop you from challenging yourself. Feel alive in your attempts to better yourself.

When you succeed, you will learn many things about yourself. And when you fail, you will realize your shortcomings. But that is only true if you have what it takes to face your fears.

Knowledge of the past and planning for the future is indeed essential. But we can't live our lives in them because they don't really exist.

If you only remember mistakes from the past, they become regrets that you can never get rid of.

And if you only worry about what will happen in the future, they become the worries that weigh you down.

Instead, you should focus on the present. Put everything you have in the 'here and now.'"

Eren expressed what he truly felt about Becky's death.

He had been following his own advice too. He would have been paralyzed after learning about the existence of Demon Princes and the gods that were after him if he had the same mindset as Becky. That kind of information would have turned him into a cooped-up chicken.

After all, the Demon Princes and the gods were not entities he could deal with in his current situation. But they were also not relevant to his current reality. That's why he chose to live in the present, telling Alephee to do the same.

The White Raven crew knew what Eren was talking about. They remembered how Becky was okay with letting the items from Sage Legacies go because they were getting targeted for them. They started remembering other instances in the past that highlighted Becky's nature as an overly cautious ranker.

Eren turned around to face his teammates and spoke calmly.

"I know my words may sound like the words of a cold-blooded leader who is okay with his mage's death. And maybe I am just that.

But that doesn't make anything I have said less true. Becky's parting is a lesson for all of us.

And don't think that I am not putting myself through the same standards as the rest of you. If anything, I allow even fewer concessions to myself.

I may not be proud of all the things I have done. But I feel no shame in saying that I have zero talent and all my achievements are the result of my diligent work alone. And I could only do that because I dared to.

You are different from me. Your talent will shine one day because it exists. But that is only if you learn from Becky's mistakes."

Steve and the rest looked at each other when Eren stopped speaking. They had to admit that Eren's words had a certain weight attached to them. That's because they had seen him walk the talk he was giving them.

Eren used a consumable Sansara Perk to summon a bottle of wine. The chalices were also summoned using expendable Karma points.

The butcher poured wine into everyone's glasses and made sure they were filled to the brim before continuing.

"Rebecca White was an enigma.

She was nothing like the elemental aspect she had unlocked for herself. She was warm and caring. And yet her words were like sharp needles when it came to criticizing someone."

Eren took a brief pause and chuckled before continuing.

"Hehe. Who am I kidding? Let me correct that– when it came to criticizing me.

Still, she obeyed my orders when they mattered. And did everything she could to support her team."

Eren managed to get a chuckle from his audience when he said that. The butcher pursed his lips and raised his glass before concluding his toast.

"What has happened cannot be changed. Becky is resting in eternity. And although her death has already been avenged, we can still make it up for her by winning the last Sage Legacy for ourselves."

Steve smirked when he heard Eren's toast.

"Selfish… you are truly selfish, you bastard."

Eren shrugged his shoulders before admitting straight away.

"Heh! I don't mind the tag to be honest.

It's true. I intend to use Becky's death as a motivator to win the fourth Sage Legacy. The goal of doing that is to find some kind of closure for all of us.

Is it really wrong to immortalize her name in Edinburgh's history by making her team get all four Sage Legacies to themselves? I think not.

Death doesn't have to make sense for the living. Nevertheless, we attempt to explain it by coming up with a variety of explanations. These explanations keep emotionally deficient guys like me striving for more in life. I hope you find it within you to ignore that deficiency of mine.

That's about it. Those were my two eddies.

To Becky…"

Eren gulped down the contents of his glass down his throat right after he finished speaking. It prompted all of his teammates to do the same.

Another round of toasts was initiated. The rest of the members told a few anecdotes about Becky one after another before concluding the impromptu ceremony. They used their movement spells and leaped to the other cliff, supposedly leaving the matter of Becky's death behind them. After all, time was ticking away and the show had to go on.