Chapter 64 - Not So Different

After lunch, the students were allowed to visit the village on their own. Jiwon tagged along with Junhyung's gang to take a look at the music shops nearby. There were a series of shops selling musical instruments. Jiwon was looking for a vintage, acoustic guitar for himself. His grandfather had sent him some money for his birthday and he decided to splurge on a new instrument.

"Check out this one!" Junhyung pointed excitedly at one store's display. A red, electric guitar hung there.

"Looks too flashy," Jumyeon, one of their friends, voiced out.

"How about this one?" Hyunsik, another one of their friends, pointed at a blue bass guitar.

"Just doesn't look good enough," Jiwon said, shaking his head. 

"Meh, I'll buy it for myself," Hyunsik shrugged.

"Suit yourself," Jiwon said. "I'll look around more."

"We'll check out this store then," Junhyung suggested. "Why don't you check out the other stores in the street while we get our stuff?"

"Alright," Jiwon agreed. "I'll see you guys in a while."

Taking his leave, Jiwon wandered down the road, looking at the other stores. He looked at all the stores but could not find a guitar he could connect with. All of the instruments were expensive but the money was not an issue for him. Being an articulate person, Jiwon seeked perfection in everything. He did not need a good guitar; he needed the right one. 

Sighing, he turned away from the stores and set off towards a different path. There were more shops up front according to his map. He was passing by a graffiti filled wall when a familiar figure caught his eye. It was Hyun Jung. He was walking too quickly, looking back every now and then, as if he was afraid of being seen. A look of genuine fear was sprawled across his face.

Jiwon tried to ignore Hyun Jung's expression but his curiosity got the better of him. Even though he had no love lost for his roommate, it was still difficult to ignore Hyun Jung's prominent display of fear. 

Jiwon quietly followed the nerdy boy. Hyun Jung was straying far from the village and was heading towards a poorer segment of the area. He kept on walking until he stopped a little far away from a shabby hut. Curious at what Hyun Jung was doing, Jiwon inched a little closer to observe the other boy.

Hyun Jung stayed rooted to his spot, overlooking the shabby hut. He was peering at it, as if hoping to catch a glimpse of someone. Finally, a woman came out of the hut. She was wearing a cloth over her head, sneaking her way towards the place where Hyun Jung was standing. She was looking back after a few seconds, making sure she was not being followed.

Upon seeing Hyun Jung, her solemn face broke into a smile. Hyun Jung, too, looked delighted at her sight. She rushed forward and scooped him into an embrace, tears falling from her eyes. Hyun Jung said some inaudible things to her, smiling widely. The woman was also teary eyed and handed him a packaged box. 

They stood there, talking for a while, when suddenly the woman was startled by the sound of glass shattering. The sound came from the house. She hurriedly pushed Hyun Jung away, urging him to leave and scurried home. Hyun Jung did not waste any time and quickly ran away from the house. Jiwon scrambled to hide behind a tree to avoid detection.

Once Hyun Jung was out of sight, he crept closer to the house. Suddenly, an earth shattering scream came from it. The woman was crying loudly and sounds of whipping could be heard. A man was yelling at her which was followed by the swoosh of another whipping. 

The woman's screams brought back memories of Jiwon's sisters beating him up. Flashes of Yeri beating him with a stick came in front of his eyes. Jiwon felt his body go cold. His breaths were becoming shorter, making it difficult for him to inhale air. He clutched his chest, beating it to ease his breathing but to no avail. 

I have to run! He realized. His panic attack was setting in. Still holding his chest, he ran back towards the village. Once the house was out of view, he took out a small vial of pills. Hastily taking out two of them, he popped them in his mouth. Slowly, his breath steadied and he was able to calm down.

Jiwon had been suffering from such panic attacks since he was five but the disorder went unnoticed. Once Sohee discovered his condition, she ensured that he got regular treatments from the school psychiatrist. While the psychiatrist gave him prescribed medicines, he deduced that the attacks are going to psychologically haunt Jiwon whenever he will be under duress. 

Closing his eyes, Jiwon began to count till hundred. Once he calmed down, he decided to head back to the boarding house. By the time he got back, it was already evening. The other students were sitting at the yard, preparing for a nighttime barbecue.

"Where were you?" Junhyung asked as Jiwon approached them. "We were waiting for you!"

"I strayed a little further away from the village," Jiwon replied. It was not a complete lie. "I thought, why not do some sightseeing outside the village as well."

"Did you find a guitar?"

"Not yet," Jiwon admitted. After peeping on Hyun Jung, he completely forgot about buying a guitar. He glanced over to observe Hyun Jung. He was sitting by himself in a corner, lost in his own thoughts. 

Suddenly, he caught Jiwon staring at him. Hyun Jung frowned as Jiwon quickly looked away. There was something about Jiwon's expression which troubled him. 

Jiwon was caught off guard by Hyun Jung's questioning gaze. The guy was already wary of him. Even though Jiwon did not like Hyun Jung much, what he witnessed at that old shack refused to leave his mind. The woman's screams were still ringing in his ears and so were the whiplashes of the man.

After seeing the affectionate exchange between the woman and Hyun Jung along with their frightened demeanor during their meeting, Jiwon could only come to one conclusion. The woman was Hyun Jung's mother and like him, Hyun Jung also suffered from child abuse.

Turns out, we are not so different after all, Jiwon mused ironically.