“It’s morning-!”

Gshyaaah!

The black curtains are thrown up at once.

The white morning sun invades the room without mercy.

“GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

A wild scream.

The owner of that voice is an old man writhing around in a gothic canopy bed.

“Mister, it’s morning!”

The girl smiled brightly as she approached the bed.

And, with body strength one wouldn’t expect from such a small body, threw off the blankets.

“Mister, morning!”

“You… You can’t just… Can you stop doing this every morning… How many times do I have to say that this uncle isn’t good with the sun?”

“If you say things like that, you’re never going to be able to return to society!”

It’s always like this.

This old man is a vampire.

A real vampire.

Known as “The Lord of the Night” and “The Merciless Ruler of Darkness”, he was a vampire king who was greatly feared several centuries ago.

However, after withdrawing from the world for several hundred years…

Vampires have become extinct in the outside world, relegated to “Something that only exists in fables”.

So, no matter how much he says that he is a vampire, the situation is that he’s being looked down on like an angsty youth.

But really, the man still doesn’t quite understand. He was a ruler of darkness, his name would inspire fear and loathing the world over, but he was now being pestered by a girl who thinks he’s simply scared of society.

The man sighed and looked into his bedside dressing table.

He took a bottle of drink, an amber coloured liquor that he has been taking a nightcap from to help him sleep.

Recently, he has been going to bed so early in the night, he has no choice but to do it.

He took a sip directly from the bottle.

The strong taste of alcohol leaves a burning sensation on his tongue.

However, the sensation eventually gives way to a mellow feeling in his mouth, with an acidic yet sweet taste which for some reason made him think of a forest of trees.

He rolled the liquid in his mouth until the sweet flavour had spread, and then swallowed.

The warmth of the liquor passes down his throat and into his stomach.

The man then picked up his long pipe and puffed on it.

There’s nothing quite as exquisite as a smoke after a high-quality drink…

“…Ah, sorry, I forgot that you weren’t good with smoke. Pardon me, I’ll extinguish it right now.”

“N-no, I don’t mind!”

The girl smiles, but she already has tears welling up in her eyes.

She must be forcing herself.

The man extinguished the pipe.

“I feel like I’m telling you this every morning, but I really have no need to ‘return’ to society, so you should go and find someone who needs help more than I do.”

“No, I really don’t think there’s someone who needs more help than a middle-aged man living in a historical site and claiming that ‘It’s my castle’! I was sent here to help you by God! Because I was chosen as a Saint!”

The saint was full of energy today.

Sighing, the man took another sip of liquor.

The taste was stronger this time as he washes it across his tongue.

The sweet taste was more intense than before. Looking at the distilled spirit that he had owned for many years, the empty green bottle bore no labeling.

“Aah, out of booze… Is there some more in the cellar…?”

“Mister! You can’t be drinking like this in the morning!”

The saint is angry again.

The man scratched his chin that was covered in stubble.

“You might be right… But these days, I just can’t help but drink. I’ll have to ask you to overlook just this much.”

“It’s fine if you drink at night, but drinking in the morning is no good! Just drinking one drop of liquor in the morning is like resigning yourself from society for a full week!”

Today as well, the Saint is doing her best to reintegrate this man into society.

He sighed once again.

“Alright, alright. If it will make you happy, I’ll stop drinking.”

“No, you also need to go outside!”

“Like I told you, this Uncle is weak to the sun. …Oi.”

The man snapped his fingers.

And the door to the room opened at his command.

As soon as it did, a young girl entered.

Her short hair would have concealed her gender if not for the maid outfit that she wore.

Black hair covering one of her eyes, the girl remains expressionless as she bows.

She quickly retrieved the bottle from the man’s bedside table and left again with another bow.

“There, the alcohol is gone. Are you happy now?”

“…Waitwaitwaitwaitwait! Who was that!? Was she mister’s daughter… No, granddaughter!?”

“It’s a familiar.”

“Familiar!?”

“At first, it was just a bat. But to help this Uncle stay secluded, I gradually made its features more suitable for housework.”

“B-but that was a young girl!”

“Young? Nothing of the sort. Hmm, that’s right. What do you think, young lady? Isn’t having a familiar or two very much like a vampire?”

“That’s…”

The Saint teetered.

“Have you finally started to believe me?” the man said, stroking his chin.

But…

“Mister, I don’t want to believe it, but are you forcing that young girl to sell herself!?”

“…What? How did you come to that conclusion?”

“B-but putting that aside, mister, you say that girl is in charge of the chores, is that right!?”

“Well, I suppose so…”

“That’s not good! According to my in-depth research, nine out of ten shut-ins refuse to clean their room, and the rest do such a bad job they shouldn’t have bothered!”

“How on earth did you collect that kind of data…”

“So, mister, in order to rejuvenate your unemployed spirit, let’s do a thorough cleaning of the house!”

The Saint clenched her fist.

The man looked toward the door reluctantly.

This is a castle.

A three-story castle that children who go by laugh about because of how much of a ruin it looks like.

There are three huge spires, and he always liked that the exterior wall was painted in black.

The interior was… How big was it again?

…At any rate, it wasn’t small.

He doesn’t remember just how many rooms there are because it has been so long since he has needed to leave his room, but there should be somewhere between ten and twenty.

“…Honestly, I think it would be easier to find a normal job than clean this place.”

“That’s the spirit! Don’t worry, I’ll help as well!”

“That’s not… Just so you know, this is going to take longer than one or two days.”

“Then we can train both our minds and bodies!”

The Saint clenched her fist once again as she said that.

The man tried to think of some way to get her to give up…

But, he failed.

“…It can’t be helped.”

The man made up his mind.

The vampire might still have not left his castle.

…But, for today at least, he will leave his room.