Chapter 109: Old World Blues

Chapter 109: Old World Blues

"Well, well, well," a synthesized voice from somewhere in the tank exclaimed in a slightly British accent. "Look who finally decided to turn up. It's about damn time! And where have we been, hmmm? Crawling around through pits of radioactive muck again?"

"Are..." I sighed, clutching my head and rubbing my temple. "You're my brain, aren't you?"

"Ah, lovely." My... well, my brain said to me from its... his... spot floating in the tank. "Figured that out, have we?" My brain then proceeded to mock me in the type of voice you'd use with a newborn. "Would you like a cookie?"

"There's no need to be snide," I said, folding my arms across my chest. "I mean, give me a break. Even with all the shit that's happened since getting shot in the face, meeting your own brain by far takes the cake. It's... kind of an odd concept, you know?"

"Yes, well, believe me," my brain spat out. "The opposite is equally true." The brain shook a little, and several bubbles surged out of the wires at the base. "Good LORD! Have you even bathed at ALL since they pulled me out of you?" I looked down, at first a bit shocked - I had indeed taken a shower, the sink in The Sink wouldn't talk to me, otherwise! - and then realized that I was covered in ash and grime from my fight with the giant robo-scorpion. So instead, I just pointed at the tank filled with yellowish-green liquid that contained my brain.

"What about you? That tank isn't exactly looking springtime fresh!" Several bubbles again appeared, and a few lights in the base of the tank below the brain flickered.

"Wh- I... well... that - that's a completely different matter!" My brain stammered out eventually. "This tank isn't biological, it's not the same at all!" Doesn't seem all that different to me.

"You know, I didn't think my own brain would be this much of a dick," I sighed and chuckled a bit. "Was I this much of a dick before? Eh, probably..."

"Well, that's a fine how-do-you-do!" My brain wobbled a bit in the tank, the lights flickering below it. "Me! A, quote, dick, unquote! As if I'm the one responsible for the way you carry on, gadding about the Wastes!"

"Oh, c'mon now!" I said. "Some of that stuff can be fun!" He let out a heavy growling sigh.

"Fun? FUN?! Is tetanus fun? Is lupus? Radiation sickness? What about sepsis, enjoy that, do we? The things you do with our body are suicidally dangerous, and if you could silence your glandular impulses, you would hear me screaming at you!"

"Wait, hang on -" But my brain didn't let me finish. He just kept yelling at me.

"I'm not the one that makes us clamber around Vaults infested with mutant plant life or go charging off to New Vegas on missions of ill-conceived revenge! I don't cause us to run head-first into super mutant strongholds and craters full of radiation! I don't send us driving straight into cazador nests! And don't think I've forgotten about who got us shot in the head and buried in a shallow grave in the first place! That was most certainly NOT enjoyable!"

"Sheesh..." I said, backing off a bit. "Sorry. I didn't realize it caused you this much distress..." The brain let out a single curt laugh.

"Well, maybe next time you hear me telling you that charging a Nightkin with a penknife is a bad idea, you'll listen!" he said matter-of-factly. Right, I'd had enough of this.

"Okay, couple of things. One: I'd just shoot them. If I recall, it was Veronica who charged after the Nightkin when we went to Black Mountain. And two: you're kind of responsible. I mean... you're my brain." The brain shook in its tank again, and the lights flashed quicker.

"I most certainly am NOT responsible!" he said incredulously. "I am the seat of all reason and logic in our little partnership! All those..." he let out a sound of utter disgust. "...FEELINGS... that motivate you, that sense of righteousness and that rush you get when you help someone... do you know where those come from? HMMM?"

"Well, don't the-"New novel chapters are published on

"GLANDS." he said, cutting me off forcefully. "They come from glands. Free of the tyranny of your ape-like and primitive endocrine system, I can now see how foolish and infantile your motives are!"

I blinked, trying to remember something I'd seen in one of Arcade's medical journals a while back.

"You do know that the brain is the source of most of those glands, right?" I paused, thinking again. "I mean, unless you're trying to argue that my thyroid is to blame?"

A long, heavy silence hung in the air between us. It was so thick I could almost see it.

"I... well..." my brain cleared his throat. Wait, what? "Look. It's all a very complex system of biofeedback and other things I wouldn't expect you to understand."

"Admit it!" I pointed at my brain, pressing my finger against the glass. "You're just as glandular as I am." The brain sighed heavily.

"Oh... fine. All right. Perhaps... perhaps I am." His tank bubbled again. "But at least I'm logical about it!"

"I'll tell you what's not logical..." Aside from this entire conversation. "The fact that you sound British. Why do you sound like that? I mean, you're my brain. We've already established this. Shouldn't you sound a bit like me?"

"Yes, well..." my brain grumbled nervously, and the lights flashed again. "I suppose the use of Received Pronunciation is a decent enough shorthand for 'Intelligent Person,' even now. But there isn't exactly a large selection of voice-module boxes here in the Forbidden Zone. It's not as though brain-sustaining life support tanks grow on trees, you know. So, I've just had to make do. It was either this, or use the voice of a heavyset female potato farmer from Estonia."

Another heavy silence hung in the air. It was broken slightly by the sound of Mobius humming to himself, somewhere below us.

"Wh-" I started. "Why... why would Mobius even have that?" My brain just sighed.

"I don't know. I've given up trying to find meaning in the smaller things he does. His plans make sense when looked at from a broad perspective, but the details tend to appear insane and incomprehensible under close scrutiny, even when you know what the whole plan is supposed to be."

"Speaking of Mobius' plans, how did he get hold of you, anyway?" I asked, looking back down the stairs. The floating brain was scrawling something on the floor, and I laughed a bit when I realized that both Roxie and Stripe had left my side to follow his insane scribbling. "I think Borous said something about flushing...?"

"Something to that effect, yes," he said, almost nodding inside the tank. "After the Think Tank extracted me from your skull, they fell to bickering amongst themselves. I'm sad to say that we were quite forgotten about. Dr. Mobius saw an opportunity to gain some leverage, and had me spirited away to this very dome."

"That seems like a pretty unlikely coincidence," I paused, and then smirked. "Pardon my French." My brain laughed.

"Hardly. Mobius keeps a close optical sensor on the goings-on at the Think Tank. As soon as he saw the opportunity, he took it." Something still wasn't quite adding up, though...

"But how did he do it?" I asked again. The tank bubbled, and my brain seemed hesitant to answer, until finally:

"I don't know," he finally admitted. "I'm afraid the trauma of our separation rendered me quite insensate. I didn't come around until I was safely ensconced in this tank. I'm quite sure whatever he did was highly scientific, though."

I looked back down at Mobius. He was still scrawling notes - on the walls now - and humming something that sounded like 'the knee bone's connected to the eye bone...'

"Yeah, I'll just bet..." I shook my head and laughed, turning back to the brain. "So... Uh... Do you want to be reunited?" I asked.

"I'm not going to lie to you," my brain sighed. "The prospect is definitely not... all that... appealing." He cleared his non-existent throat again. "I mean... look at it from my perspective. Here, I have peace. Quiet. Safety. Security... well, barring the odd rogue robo-scorpion. But when I was in your head - you never took the time to just... slow down and think things through! You were always too busy with danger! Poison! Radiation! Grisly injuries - speaking of, I see you've picked up a few more since I left. I swear, you're like a toddler who insists on finding new and interesting ways of damaging yourself!"

"Well, hey-" I lifted up my cybernetic arm, and flexed the robot hand. "I admit, getting my arm chopped off wasn't really in my plan of things to do that day, but this seems to be doing alright. Stronger than my old arm, at least."

"That's as may be," my brain continued coldly. "But there is one last thing about living in your head that I can certainly do without..."

"I'm almost afraid to ask," I chuckled.

"Biological functions," he spat out with venom. "Do you know how much more you can get done when you're not constantly looking for places to urinate? When you're not looking for holes to stick your dick into? When you're not looking for alcohol and radiation-laced food to pour down your mouth-hole? It's quite a lot, I can tell you! I've been trying to better myself, you see. Studying the classics, and acquiring a solid grounding in medicine and the Sciences. I mean, I actually found time to read The Brothers Karamazov the other day! Plato's Dialogues, before that! To say nothing of the complete works of William Shakespeare I've been perusing every half hour."

"Is that why you sound so much smarter than me?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"Perhaps," he coughed. "Although, I'm fairly certain this tank has been liberally salted with ground Mentats. So, there is that."

"Back to the point," I quickly forced out, trying to ignore the unpleasant implications of my brain on Mentats again. "You're just focusing on the negatives!" I was desperately trying to formulate some kind of positive argument that would win over my brain. Not easy, when all I could think about were memories of addiction. "What about all the good sensations in life? The feel of a cool breeze on your cheek on a hot afternoon? The astounding vista of a sunrise creeping over the jagged mountains of the wasteland? The smell of delicious, crispy bacon? And what about..." I was struggling to come up with something else...

An image of flowing dark raven hair seemed to pass in front of my eyes for a fraction of a second... or was it red hair? I couldn't tell.

"What about love?" I said finally, gritting my teeth. My brain just seemed to brush it off.

"Overrated biological feedback. Believe me, you only feel that way because you've got all that meat..." The gel in the tank bubbled again. "... oozing hormones."

"Maybe so, maybe so," I nodded, as if in agreement. "But isn't it just as true that you only feel this way because you're lacking those hormones, sitting in that biogel of yours?"

Again, another palpable silence hung between us.

"Hm. I suppose you... may be right. It does call certain assumptions into question, doesn't it?"

"Well, that's why you shouldn't assume," I smirked, unable to resist. "It just makes an ass of you-"

"Oh, shut up you empty-headed pillock," my brain interrupted me again, practically growling. "Nobody likes that joke."

"The point is, we're at an impasse," I said, waving a hand at his tank. "You can't feel what I feel, and I can't think the way you think."

"Indeed," he said, his tank flashing dimly. "It is certainly quite the conundrum."

"I don't think it is," I said flatly, smiling at my brain. "I think we just have to trust each other, and acknowledge that we aren't complete if we're separated. If we join together, knowing what we both know now, then we can make ourselves better together than either of us could be on our own."

"There is a chance that the re-integration would create some improved synergy between us, yes..." he said, almost thoughtfully. If he had a chin, I'm sure he'd be stroking it. It's what I would do.

"Seriously though," I leaned forward, pressing a hand against the side of the tank and smiling. "What do you say, brain? Join me for some more wild adventures?"

"Well..." he sighed again. "I suppose you've convinced me well enough. If that's your final decision, then I'll rejoin you, taking my place inside your head once again." I was just about to say something, but then my brain started speaking again. "HOWEVER."

"Hmm?" I muttered, folding my arms across my chest.

"You don't..." my brain hesitated. "You don't actually think you're going to fail, do you?" He seemed legitimately worried.

"Nah, I'll be fine," I said with a smirk. "But you told me to listen to you more, right? You said you wanted safety and security, right? Well, this is me, trying to keep you safe. You know what they say - 'fail to prepare, and prepare to fail,' right?"

"Wise words," my brain said softly. "Good luck." And with that, Roxie escorted my brain into the elevator that led up to The Sink, the door sliding shut behind them. As soon as they had disappeared, I smiled, laughing to myself.

"Potty mouth," I looked back at the deuce, parked safely within the bounds of the force field. Sitting on top of the truck was Stripe, staring at me intently. "C'mon you little gremlin. If things go sideways, I'm gonna need you to raise some hell."

Squeak!

A few minutes later, I stepped out of the elevator, and into the Think Tank's chamber... and I could tell immediately that things were already not going to plan. For one thing, all five of them were lined up and waiting for me, like they were when I first woke up after the brain extraction... and what's more, the subtle, soft blue lighting that had bathed the Think Tank before was gone completely, replaced with a much more menacing red.

Great.

I motioned for Stripe to stay out of sight as I stepped up the ramp, and into the chamber; even without me saying anything, he seemed to get it. I calmly walked up to Klein, who was presenting himself front-and-center, and hoped that he wouldn't notice I was holding the holorifle in my hands without any difficulty.

"THE LOBOTOMITE RETURNS!" Klein bellowed. "OUR LOBOTOMITE. HAS DOCTOR MOBIUS BEEN DENOMINATED INTO SCRAP METAL AND VOICE MODULE PARTS, AS WE HOPED?"

"Not quite." I said simply. Klein merely stared at me in confusion.

"YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO REPEAT THAT. I THINK MY AUDIO-SENSORS ARE NOT WORKING. IT SOUNDED LIKE YOU REPLIED IN THE NEGATIVE."

"Thing is, Klein, I found my brain. Now, you and I are gonna settle things." Klein puffed himself up, his face-screens trembling with barely contained rage.

"I WOULD RECOMMEND WATCHING YOUR TONE WITH ME, LOBOTOMITE." Klein yelled out menacingly, in what I could only assume was his attempt at a growl. "NOW... 'YOUR' BRAIN. HAND. IT. OVER. IF YOU DO NOT, THEN WE SHALL EXTRACT IT AGAIN, ALONG WITH ANY OTHER ORGANS YOU MIGHT FIND USEFUL, AND THEN TOSS THEM ALL INTO THE INCINERATOR!"

"I'm not handing my brain over," I said, calm as I could muster. "Thing is, there are things that we need to discuss first. Like the terms of our arrangement."

"THE TERMS?! THERE IS NOTHING THAT WE COULD POSSIBLY HAVE TO SAY TO AN IGNORANT LOBOTOMITE ON THE SUBJECT! YOU HAVE THE BRAIN. WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY. ALL YOU MUST DO... IS SURRENDER. WITH YOUR BRAIN, WE CAN FINALLY LEAVE THIS PLACE. I CANNOT TELL YOU HOW BORING THIS PLACE GETS, CHOPPING UP THE LANDSCAPE, DAY AFTER DREARY DAY! AND WE HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS TO ASK YOUR BRAIN FIRST! ABOUT THIS... MOJAVE PLACE. A FERTILE TESTING GROUND FOR OUR EXPERIMENTS..." Klein shook his tank, and then hovered over to a spot several feet above me, so I was forced to crane my neck up to look at him even further."NO, THESE ARE OUR TERMS, AND YOU MUST ACCEPT THEM. AND ONCE YOU DO, YOU WILL BE DISPOSED OF LIKE THE TOOL THAT HAS SERVED ITS PURPOSE THAT YOU ARE."

"Really." I deadpanned, gripping the holorifle tighter. "Well, maybe you should confer with your colleagues, first, before making any rash decisions..." I cast a glance over to the purple-tanked brain, hovering a few feet away from Klein. She looked at me... and the lights in her tank flashed.

"NONSENSE!" Klein yelled, his whole chassis shaking. "CONFER? COLLEAGUES? THOSE ARE TWO WORDS I DO NOT RECOGNIZE!"

"Doctor Klein!" Dala finally blurted out, drawing his attention. "I must... intersect. Please..." Dala looked back at me again, and her tank bubbled. "Please, do not... don't harm the Lobotomite!"

Result.

"I'M NOT GOING TO HARM IT, DALA," Klein turned in midair to face the female Think Tank. "I'M JUST GOING TO DISSECT IT UNTIL IT'S DEAD." Klein turned back to me, paused, and then turned to look at Dala again. "WHY THE SUDDEN INTERSECTION, DALA?"

"I just... I cannot stand a breathing... a sweet, breathing... o-organism... breathing in... and out... and i-in... to suddenly not breathe any longer. Please, Doctor Klein. You must reconsider," Dala pleaded. "We must keep it alive. For... study. Slow... study." My face broke into a smile, and I did my best to subtly wink at her. I don't think any of the other Think Tanks noticed... but she definitely did.

"DALA, THESE... VOCALIZED PAUSES ARE QUITE UNLIKE YOU. WHAT DO YOU CARE? NORMALLY, YOU'RE THE FIRST TO BRING THE LOBOTOMITES TO THE VIVISECTION TABLE!"

"Maybe she just wants to keep her sex toy?" I offered up, unable to hold it in any longer. Luckily, the meaning sailed straight over Klein's tank.

"TOY?" He looked around, confused. "WHAT TOY, WHERE? I DON'T SEE ANY TOYS..."

"Klein, uh..." Zero was the next to speak up. Dala floated out of the way, so Zero could have the chance to get right in Klein's face. He didn't take it. At least, not right away. "You know, this... this Lobotomite, he's a great sounding board! You respect Idea-ology, right? Well, this one, he... well... I mean, he's got some pretty good ideas!"

"SILENCE, DOCTOR O," Klein said, not even bothering to look at Zero as he spoke. "THIS IS A THINK TANK DECISION. SAVE YOUR OBJECTIONS UNTIL AFTER I HAVE DECIDED OUR COURSE OF ACTION!"

And that was the final straw.

"You know what, Klein?" Zero surged forward, practically butting his tank against Klein's. "STICK A STRAW IN YOUR TANK AND GO SUCK YOURSELF!" Zero bellowed right in Klein's digital face. "LONG! AND! DEEP! And my name isn't O, you self important, pompous cloaca! My name is ZERO! Yeah! A big fat zero, with a slash running right through the middle of it! What do you think of that, HUH?!" Klein backed away during this verbal onslaught, but paused when Zero mentioned -

"THE SLASH!" Klein exclaimed, as if being granted an epiphany. "AS A DESIGNATOR OF... WHY, THAT IS BRILLIANT! UTTERLY PROFOUND! BUT... HOW DID YOU...?"

"The Lobotomite taught me that!" Zero said, looking at me, and nodding his tank. I nodded back at him with a smile. "He taught me that a name is more than... um... that I should take pride in... things..." Damn. And he was going so well. "Like... names... and..." Finally running out of steam, he shook his head and went back to shouting. "You know what? Forget it, Klein! I hate you! HATE! Let me tell you how much I've come to hate you since I started working for you! There are 387.44 MILLION MILES of printed circuits in wafer thin layers that fill every cubic nanometer of my chassis! If the word HATE was engraved on EACH NANOANGSTROM of those HUNDREDS of MILLIONS of MILES, it would not equal ONE ONE-BILLIONTH of the HATE I feel for YOU at this specific MICRO-INSTANT in TIME! HATE! HATE! HAAAAAATE!"

The whole room fell silent as Zero ended his rant. He just hovered there in the center of the room, staring angrily at Klein, heavy panting echoing out of his voice box. Every one of the Think Tank had backed away, and I'm not too proud to admit that I was a bit freaked out by this sudden and wholly unexpected turn of from Zero as well. Where the fuck did THAT come from?!

"And you know what else?" Zero spoke up again, to add one last petty grain of salt to the already gaping, festering wound: "Your theory of branial beam oscillation? The Chinese had it first, you copycat! So there! Nyah!" With that, Zero started to float away. "Okay, whoo. Bit lightheaded. I think I need a lie-down..." That's when Klein managed to take the opportunity to rally himself somewhat.

"HOW - HOW DARE YOU! BRANIAL BEAM OSCILLATION TECHNOLOGY WAS SOLELY MY DISCOVERY! I EXPRESSLY TOLD YOU THAT, AND THEN DELETED ALL EVIDENCE TO THE CONTRARY! GET BACK HERE YOU -"

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"ET 2, 8?" Klein spun around in place, turning to face the Think Tank slowly advancing on him. 8 seemed firm and resolute in his decision to rebel against Klein; you could tell just by how smooth and steady his approach through the air was. "WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE THIS? YOU'VE NEVER REFUSED TO COMMIT NECESSARY... SURGERY BEFORE!" Klein turned to try and look at both me and 8 advancing on him. "AND THIS LOBOTOMITE NEEDS ITS SURGERY!"

What followed was the strangest two minutes of my life.

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"A NOBLE SPEECH!" Klein said; sure enough, I found myself wiping away moisture at the corners of my eyes. 8's words were just... just so moving! "BUT... THERE IS NO ROOM IN MY VOCABULATORS FOR 'FRIEND' AND 'LOBOTOMITE' IN THE SAME SENTENCE! THE VERY CONCEPT - REVOLTING! PERHAPS YOU ARE IRRADIATED WITH CAMARADERIE RADIATION." Klein paused. "WE HAVE CHEMS FOR THAT. WE CAN SAVE YOU FROM YOUR CRIPPLING EMOTIONAL ADDICTION!"

From the other side of the room, I heard one last voice speak up with a cough. Borous was finally advancing on Klein. I smiled, realizing that absolutely everyone in the room was ganging up on Klein. This was proving to be easier than I thought!

"If I may," the green-tanked brain began. "I feel as if I must be the voice of REASON here! This Lobotomite is MUCH like US, regarding even ANIMALS and PETS as nothing more than avenues to promote SCIENCE! There is GOOD here! Instead of ending its life on the table... we should PROLONG its suffering, in the name of SCIENCE! Like good old GABE, the FINEST of lab specimens!"

Okay, that wasn't quite exactly what I was expecting, but I'll take it.

"WHY AM I EVEN LISTENING TO YOU FOOLS?! ENOUGH!" Klein returned to the center of the room, yelling louder than he ever had before, and then did something unexpected: he let out some form of shockwave. Every member of the Think Tank was forced away from him, and even I was a bit staggered - if only from surprise, as the shockwave didn't carry that much force behind it. "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS MUTINOUS CHORUS! IF THERE IS A WORD I HATE, IT'S 'MUTINY!'... AND POSSIBY THE WORD 'JISM,' WHICH NEVER MADE ANY SENSE TO ME. ITS RIDICULOUS, PUTTING THE 'J' AND 'SM' TOGETHER LIKE THAT - NONSENSE! I COUNT AS FIVE, LIKE THE MIGHTY HUMAN HAND I ONCE HAD, WITH ITS FIVE PENISES CLENCHED TOGETHER IN A FIST!"

"You know," I said, regaining my composure, and deciding to finish him off with a big right hook. "For someone who only has a doctorate in game theory, your math is a bit off - and the odds aren't really in your favor." Klein's eye screens stared down, completely fixed on me and trembling slightly.

"WHAT?! WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT -" Klein looked back and forth to the other members of the Think Tank, and quickly changed the subject. "NEVERMIND! THE MATHEMATICS OF THE SITUATION ARE ON OUR SIDE LOBOTOMITE! I BELIEVE -"

"Ahem," Dala said.

"Ahem," Zero said.

**[ * . . . . . . . ]**...

"Ahem," Borous said.

For the first time, Klein looked truly worried...

"NO... WAIT, HMM. CARRY THE TWO... THEN... HMMM. IF THIS WERE A DEMOCRACY, I WOULD BE CONCERNED. WE ARE TOO... SCIENTIFIC FOR THAT. SO JUST SURRENDER!"

"You're right," I said, pleased at how he'd just shot himself in the foot (so to speak). "It's not a democracy. This is a research facility... and well over half your colleagues dispute your findings. In fact, it looks like it's all of them against just you." Klein trembled with rage.

"YOU DARE USE LOGIC AGAINST ME?!" he bellowed. I nodded, setting the holorifle against my shoulder.

"That's the idea," I said with a smirk. "So, I'm going to propose a deal: I'm not going to surrender. You are."

"WHAT?!" Klein yelled out. "THAT'S NO DEAL AT ALL! THERE'S A WHOLE WORLD BEYOND THE CRATER! FILLED WITH IDEAS AND POSSIBILITIES! WE COULD HAVE ESCAPED, SEEN IT ALL FOR OURSELVES! TESTED IT! PRODDED IT! MADE IT SQUIRM!" I just laughed and shook my head.

"Spoken like someone who doesn't know anything about the outside world. Tell me, Klein - you know how you guys are all so worried about venturing out into the crater yourselves, because of how dangerous it is? It's filled with lobotomites, hostile robots, deadly automated skeletons, scorpions that will drain your intelligence... not to mention all the things that'll explode for no apparent reason."

"WELL... YES," Klein said, suddenly confused. "THAT'S WHY WE SENT YOU OUT INTO THE CRATER RATHER THAN VENTURE OUT OURSELVES. NO SENSE DYING WHEN OTHERS ARE WILLING TO DO IT FOR YOU!"

"Exactly. You think the crater is dangerous? That's NOTHING compared to the dangers you'll find in the outside world, beyond the Radar Fence. Sure, you could escape... and I'd bet that within 5 minutes you'd be ripped to shreds by a wandering deathclaw, or killed by a giant albino radscorpion. You wouldn't have time to make the world squirm when it's crushing you beneath its heel. So I have a better proposition for you: I want you all to stay here. Quietly. Safely. Inside the security of the Think Tank, you can continue your research... for ME." I smiled, realizing that all five members of the Think Tank were looking down at me, seemingly fascinated by my proposition. "If you let me leave the crater... then I can come back. I can bring you pieces of the world. Manageable chunks of the Mojave, large enough to research, but small enough to no longer be a threat to any of you. All five of you will still be able to experiment, you'll be safe within the confines of the Dome, and I'll be able to come and go as I please. I'm sure you can see the benefit of this situation! It's win-win!"

Klein was silent for a long while. The other four members of the Think Tank stared at him intently.

"Let me make it a bit easier for you to decide, Klein," I said, pulling the holorifle off its resting place on my shoulder, and holding it firmly with both hands. "The pacification field is down, and your colleagues are turning against you. Seriously - do the math. You can either stay safe and do research for me..." I held the holorifle up over my head. "... or I hit you with the squareness gun. Your choice."

"FOR... YOU? AND... FOR SCIENCE?" Klein paused again. "I... I HAVE A STRANGE SENSATION... THAT... THAT I WOULD LIKE THAT. HOW... WHAT IS THE WORD? HOW ODD. YES, THAT'S IT. VERY WELL... PARTNER. AS LONG AS WE ARE PROVIDED WITH FRESH RESEARCH MATERIAL - AND AS LONG AS YOU DO NOT DESTROY US - THEN... THE THINK TANK... IS AT YOUR SERVICE." I smiled, shouldering the holorifle, and nodded at him slowly.

"I knew you'd make the right choice."