Chapter 528: Sympathy For The Devil

Bear with it a little longer...

How long was longer? Right now, I... I couldn’t tell the minutes from the seconds, the light from the dark, or even the sensations from my emotions.

I focus on a single thing – and somehow manifest two different memories... seeing two different sights, different perspectives, almost simultaneously.

A stray bit of hay on the ground – and I saw a chore, a whiff of home, something to remember fondly.

That same stray, in a single blink – now my makeshift bed, my constant discomfort, a distracting itch running across my bare skin. No fond memories.

When I looked forward, my breathing would stiffen. Terestra was in front of me, close to me. My blood would boil, I relished the thought of my fingers around her throat, her last choking gasp like music to my ears...

Then I blinked.

.....

And all I saw was my Mother again, those same desirable thoughts now repugnant... disgusting. Why would I ever think that? want that? I don’t.

But I do.

I really do.

“Dear, really,” Terestra spoke, my anger surging, my rage flaring, her gentle voice... so loving. “Just a little more.”

The Matriarch was around, lurking, staring at me constantly. I noticed her cloudy pupilless eyes – a brazen indicator of Sangumet. She’s a twin, the older. Her fangs had grown their full length, that shouldn’t be – she shouldn’t even be alive.

“Teres...tra...” She spoke, her words stunted, emotionless. “He is... not hearing... you...”

Sharp too.

Curious...

“Oh, I see...” Terestra drew back, her tone quickly losing its sickeningly tender infection. “Grieven, then?”

I blinked, whispered, “N-no...” the only sentence I managed to say, “Still me...” before the struggle of double took over me again.

My eyes fluttered close, and then I remembered.

The harsh glare of the computer monitor, moonlight pouring through the muddied window, the nearing rumbles, and fading roars of cars on the roads below.

I took a sip from a lukewarm can, adjusted my slipping glasses, and promptly pressed the spacebar to lock in my choice.

“You are a fool, an idiot, and all things moronic, if you had thought for even a second I’d spare a thought on sparing you,” Leonardo voiced my sentiments aloud, and he spat in her face. Catharsis. “Your kind has no value, no worth, and to one especially like yourself, twisted, vile, death would be the greatest thing you could provide, and I’m genuinely pleased to inform you, Elf, that that pleasure would be all mine.”

When he raised his sword high, and when he plunged it back down, I was almost at the edge of my seat with a wide smile... bracing hungrily for the sight of her head rolling along across the grass.

I remembered being sorely disappointed that my choice ended up being just an illusion of one. A party member interrupting last-minute, persuading me last-minute – a tricky process, a risky process – to bind and convert this Elf to serve my every word instead... and there I was going along with this insanity, given no actual input on the plan whatsoever. Once again, Todd’s artistic liberties and game design philosophies were frustrating me to no end.

Eshwlyn the Elf-Knight, huh?

Genuinely, what a stupid character.

I didn’t touch the computer for a few days after that absurd story beat. Until I remembered, during one cool summer night, I decided to resume my playthrough... and Eshwlyn saved my life.

A trap sprung from one of her fellow servants, a trap designed to free her as we rested for the night in a backwater tavern. Sera Nas, on the soaring back of an undead dragon, drowning everything in sight in an encumbering ring of decay and fire. I was separated, I was blinded... and right then, I was done for.

Until out of nowhere, she suddenly burst out from the raging flames, took me in her arms, and through her unexpected, startling actions – brought me to safety.

I remembered my mouth hanging, my spacebar clicking, Leonardo’s lips sputtering, “W-Why did you... do that?”

“Is it not already inherently obvious?” She asked me almost mockingly, settling me down beneath the shade of a tree. “I am now your servant, your ever-loyal, watchful Knight, to serve, to protect, and to care for...” and without being prompted, provided me sustenance from a nearby lake. “Or am I simply sorely mistaken... Master?”

As she then carefully poured the flask of water into my parched lips, I remembered seeing, I remembered only then noticing...

That her eyes gleam such a beautiful shade of green.

The next few days, in between my internship and self-teaching, often always on the brink of deprivation, I would allocate an hour or two progressing through the game.

We had been isolated from the rest of the party, and for a good majority of the time, it became just us two trekking and venturing through the lands together to reunite ourselves with them once more.

Every campfire, every opportunity to rest, I remembered Todd pitching the idea for the choice, a chance to interact further with your companions shall you choose to. I always often skip past the option to... but for some reason, for this, when it’s just her across from me between the sparks and embers of burning wood... I got curious.

“Why do you ask me about this?” Her dim green eyes eyed at me suspiciously. “You wish me to share myself – for what purpose? Knowing such irrelevant, meaningless matters, what purpose does it serve you?”

Another click, and Leonardo voiced my sentiments once again. “I’m just curious.”

“Hmph,” She furrowed her brow, turning away from me, before laying herself down to sleep. “Suffice yourself with your wonders, then, why don’t you?”

I clicked. “An Elf-Knight disobeying her Master’s request. Why, this is the first time I’ve bear witness of such treachery.”

“Yes, because given the inept nature of such a request, I thought it reasonable to simply ignore it.”

“You can just do that?”

“No, I can’t,” She said. “But with your permission, will you, at the very least, grant me the kindness, and simply allow me to?”

I gave it a long pause, before my thumb forced out another click. “Fine, very well...” Leonardo laid flat beneath the stars. “I suppose I’ll see you at dawn, then.”

I remembered one instance, as we passed by through a densely populated province. I couldn’t help but notice the stares she’d receive, the whispers and murmurs blaring through my speakers... the things they say, the names they called her... normally, I’d agreed with them, I’d have joined them... but right then, in a moment of confliction, I hit the quicksave, and promptly let my indecisions be vented out in their screams and wails.

Then once I was done, I loaded the save prior... and all was well again. But that feeling in me still lingered, it never vanished, and it only grew the more the days passed by.

One day, I caught her singing to herself. I returned to our camp – and I heard a voice. To this day, it was still the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. Came dusk, and by the fire, it became a point of topic for me to bring up, and I unhesitantly did. Afterward, she threatened to skewer me with a stray branch right there and the discussion was never brought up again.

I remembered cracking a smile, chuckling to myself even... Eshwlyn was a charming one.

She had a sister, I learned over the course of in-game weeks. Lenora was her name. Her sister being the sole reason for her long indentured servitude as a Knight for countless Masters.

The Red Roamers, Elf-Hunters, when it came to the young, they do not take any prisoners. Eshwlyn had the choice to run away, or to save her sister from her fate.

I remembered thinking of my brother – the surprise, the confusion on his face when I shoved him forward to the ground, as I ran and left him lying helpless, heaving as loud as I could to drown out his pleading screams for me.

That’s when I finally realized that despite being an Elf herself, Eshwlyn was a far better person than I could ever hope to be. Even if she wasn’t real, even if still I knew that she was only mere fiction...

To me, she was real. I remembered thinking that.

My thumb struggled to press down onto the spacebar, and I had trouble reading the text through blurred, watery sights. Leonardo said to her what I dearly wish I could myself.

“I’m sure, wherever your sister may be, she’s eternally grateful for what you’ve done for her... and however long it may take... I’m sure you’ll be reunited with her one day.”

That’s when something magical happened. Stopped my tears, halting my breath. As the screen panned closer, as the ambiance strummed a serene tune, in the luster of moonlight, in the breeze of a gentle wind – Eshwlyn formed a smile.

And for the first time... I fell in love.

“Thank you for saying that,” She said to me, her eyes glowing their brightest. “But I’m afraid, the only way we’d be reunited once more... is through death. Now I have no one else.”

There was an option to tell her that wasn’t true – that despite all, I was here for her too. But I chose silence instead. Those words... I wanted to... I needed to tell her those words myself. I swore that I would.

But for now, I was more than content with seeing her lovely smile from beyond the screen. I was happy seeing that.

Then, just as with, everything else I’ve grown to love... she took it all away from me again.

Terestra snapped her neck – crushed it.... and as I wished for it those many days prior, her head came rolling.

The last of my now dead party to go.

She fought valiantly, bravely, making only one mistake, one blunder that cost her life – saving mine... and I watched her decapited head fall before my feet, the glow of her emerald eyes lost, the white of her hair soaked in a puddle of my other compatriots.

I never did finish the game. I remembered flinging my monitor through the window that night. I didn’t need to play anymore, I’ve seen enough, experienced enough. Todd did everything right.

Now I could get everything back.

I opened my eyes, and Terestra was inches away from me again, weak, feeble, and most crucially, powerless. Now was my chance.

This body was weak, on the verge of crumbling, but it’ll have to suffice – a strong enough grip – it’ll have to suffice. I began to lift my arms, mustering the strength to lunge at her, overpower her – I will do it. I have to, I want to. I –

“Oh, Grieven,” Her gaze snapped at me. “You really dare?”

I remembered how to form a smirk, I stretched those muscles as wide as I could.

“A stranger is one thing,” She said, her stare quickly going cold. “My son is another.”

“Is it... my fault... that he’s so weak?” I sputtered out. “Your son... is pathetic.”

Terestra sighed. “No, he did it. You’re gone, consumed. In me, in him. If anything, I’m the pathetic one for making him push himself to this point. The blame is all mine.”

“Con... sumed, you say?” I heaved. “Then what am I... now?”

She stared, bored. “A remembrance. A fading echo of a fragment. You’ll fade. He’s strong. Stronger than you and I think. So rest assured, you will disappear soon.”

“Bullshit.”

“You’re the Chronicler here, Grieven,” Terestra said, rising to her feet. “Search your knowledge. It’d be a disrespect to your father’s memory if you think this is all wrong.”

“You – !”

No more energy, this body was going to give, no more arguing. I spang my arms, I lunged, I – !

I fell.

.....

Something sharp was pricking, something heavy, cold, was pushing. I moved my head, and in the corner of my eyes – I saw a foggy silvery-white.

The Matriarch. Her fangs.

I felt the warmth of blood trickle down my neck – and immediately I felt the overwhelming urge to close my eyes shut.

“Thank you, Adalia,” echoed Terestra’s voice. “Let me take him. It’s been years since I’ve put him to bed myself. I’d like the privilege, if you don’t mind.”

Suddenly, I felt warm arms envelop around me, and I recoiled at the instant.

“Don’t... touch... me...!” I managed to expel in gasps.

“You’re not my son, Grieven,” came an instant sharp response. “I won’t even dare think to.”

And then she lifted me, and I was forced to stare in those black unfeeling eyes of hers. Everything was fading, dimming.... no, not yet... I have to... she has to... she’ll listen.

She’ll know.

“I’m... taking back...” I told her, slurring. “Everything...”

“Yes,” She nodded. “You said that already.”

Then, I blinked.

And I was me again.

I gasped a breath, suddenly finding Mom in my sights, All those new different memories lingering, staying, I remembered them all, a part of me now. But despite that, I have to let her know.

“I’m me...” I slurred. “I’m still me...”

She chuckled. “I know.”