Chapter 78

78 Forever Changed

Suddenly, I felt very scared but the absolute silence in the apartment made me believe that no one else was in there anymore. The front door was left unlocked so maybe the thief had left already. I doubt that our family had any valuables or treasures that were worth stealing. Regardless, I thought that it would be a good idea if I checked all the rooms. Apart from the living room, the apartment only had two other rooms which were my parent’s bedroom and my bedroom.

I decided to head to my parent’s room first. Just like the front door, the door to my parent’s room was unlocked. I strained my ears to listen to the sound inside when I stood in front of the door, but I couldn’t make out any sound on the other side of the door. After taking in a deep breath to calm myself, my hand slowly turned the doorknob before pushing the door opened.

At first, I couldn’t comprehend what I saw as my body stood frozen in shock in the doorway to my parent’s bedroom. Then, I slowly realized that I understood what I was seeing but I just didn’t want to believe that it was true. In the next instance, my body had recovered from its initial shock and automatically ran forward into the room as fast as it could.

“Mummy!!! Daddy!!!” I yelled at the top of my lungs over and over.

I think I had never screamed that loudly before in my life. My throat hurts and tears stung the back of my eyes before spilling over and rolling down my cheeks. I felt the warmth of my tears rolling down my face as my own cries echoed in the small bedroom.

I gazed up at the sight of my parent’s bodies hanging from the ceiling. My hands reached up to clutch at my mother’s legs and then at my father’s pants. They did not move or respond no matter how many times I shook their bodies or called their names. However, that didn’t stop me from calling out to them louder and louder than before.

It was a while later when I realized that the two bodies hanging from the ceiling was completely lifeless. My legs crumbled under me at that sudden realization as my mind started taking in the truth in front of me. Then my mind started rejecting it all and the world seemed to shrink around me. The fields of my vison started to darken and narrow. My entire body felt numb and so did my face and my lips. I found it harder to breath as my chest felt tight and I was still sobbing and crying non-stop.

I covered my ears with my hand when I felt my head throb so badly that I felt like it was going to explode.

This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening!

.....

My hands shook in front of my face as I stared at them and so did the rest of my body. I curled myself up into a ball on the floor right below where the bodies of my parents were.

How did this happen? What happened? Why did they do this?

No...this isn’t happening. This isn’t happening. This can’t be happening!

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Noooo! Noooo! Nooooooo!” I screamed loudly as my hands clutched at my own hair and began pulling it.

I didn’t know how long I was screaming like a crazy person like that. Suddenly, someone was by my side and then more people came in. There were more screams of shock as more people witnessed the scene. I had no idea who they were because by that time my mind had completely shut down. More people came and they tried to pull me up from the floor and talk to me.

Of course, I didn’t hear a thing that they said to me. Somehow, I was lifted up and they sat me down on a chair. Then the police came and said something to me that I didn’t understand. Someone must have called the police; that was to be expected.

Everything else that happened felt all blurry and messy in my mind. I didn’t understand or remember anything. All I did was drift along with the flow...

All I knew was that my parents were gone, and they were never coming back.

...

I knew that it was just a horrible dream. After all, it was a dream that haunted me for years during my childhood. It was a dream that I never thought would disappear from my life. However, it had been years since I’d last had this dream. When this nightmare started, I recognized it immediately. I knew exactly what was going to happen and how it would all end. Even though I knew that this nightmare would bring me pain and suffering, I couldn’t control myself to wake up from the dream.

Instead, I went through the whole dream again and as always, I ended up waking up with a start right at the end of the nightmare. This morning was no different. I bolted up into a sitting position in bed as I struggled to catch my breath. My breathing came out in ragged pants as sweat dripped down from my forehead onto my cheeks before running down towards my chin. I reached out a hand and wiped the sweat from my face. My whole body was soaked in sweat, and it wasn’t because I felt hot.

It was still dark outside, but dawn should be approaching soon. I closed my eyes and focused on taking in deep breaths as I repeated to myself that it was all just a bad dream. My parents did hang themselves and after that I ended up in an orphanage. That was the truth; however, the truth didn’t bring me loads of pain like it used to when I was much younger. I’ve grown up and I was determined to survive that. However, seeing the scene repeat itself in my dreams also repeated the pain and suffering that I felt back then. It wasn’t a pleasant experience.

–To be continued...