Chapter 324: Captain, My Captain

Chapter 324: Captain, My Captain

In any situation there are positives and negatives. In this particular case, even though I was faced with a crew of the undead in the service of a mad god who was constantly making my life a waking nightmare, it wasnt all bad.

On the positive side, I had the ability to take control of these walking sacks of muscle via the vines growing out of their heads. I had done it before with a couple of guards back in the temple.

On the negatives side, Id done it using the wooden sword which I no longer had.

Also on the negative side, one of them could be Joshaya in disguise. While I had hit on the brilliant realisation that I could identify Joshaya by the fact he wouldnt have loads of vines growing out of him like a regular person, that just meant he had to stick to playing irregular people. Like a Shriner. These guys also only had one vine apiece.

One other negative to bear in mind was that I was going on a sea journey with these people. Nowhere to run when youre on a boat. On top of which there was always the chance of a monster from the deep eating the ship; storms destroying the ship; mutiny, because it adds that sea voyage ambience every story needs; and of course scurvy, whatever the fuck that is.

So, good and bad on both sides.

Aye, come on board, said the captain. He sounded like a normal person, rather than the punch-drunk boxer you expect the recently reanimated to sound like. I wasnt sure exactly how it worked, but they were able to regain some of their personality after a while of being resurrected. How much autonomy they had from their master, I wasnt sure.

I walked up the gangplank, which wobbled precariously. The Eternal Infinite was a beautiful boat, coated in glossy black and white paint. Ive played video games featuring pirates before (yes, thats my reference point for seafaring matters), and the aesthetic tended to be rough and ready. Wooden planks that look like youd get splinters by looking at them. But here, everything was very smooth and sleek.

The captain was dressed in a coat that had far too many brass buttons, but no hat. Although the blond wig did the same job, I suppose.

He was a large man, barrel-chested and with a wide face that didnt really suit makeup, of which he was wearing an ungodly amount.

The undead in their normal state had horrible ashy skin and glassy eyes. They didnt look all that much better with the wigs and heavy-handed paint job, especially not close-up, but it served as a distraction. You spent so much time trying to work out what kind of hair the wig was made of, you forgot to notice the soulless eyes of the living dead staring at your mortal flesh with envy.

I am Captain Somya. We are ready to leave when you are.

He was very polite and seemingly happy to let me be in charge. It had to be a trap.

Behind me, Damicar and Royn walked up the gangplank.

There were a number of crewmen all wigged running around doing whatever it is sailors do before setting sail. We didnt actually have a sail, but the ship did have a mast; it was lying on the deck. Not sure it would do much good there, but Im not a sailing man, so what do I know?

How big is the crew, Captain? I asked like I had any idea what I was talking about.

Crew of twelve, plus four supplemental. The good thing about the dead, they dont waste time with chit-chat.

The twelve are yours, and the other four?

Union Leader Royn has provided four extra men for this voyage.

I turned to look at Royn. Are you giving me four of your men to help out?

Royn smiled and nodded. No. Its a neat trick to be able to act the opposite of what you mean. The confounding skill of devious shits everywhere. They will be under my command.

Oh, decided to tag along on this voyage of the damned? Not scared of the islanders anymore?

Royn straightened his jacket and fixed his collar. I have no intention of disembarking. I merely wish to witness this debacle for myself. If you truly are an emissary of the Golden God he gave Captain Somya a questioning look, which didnt seem to get a reply then I would like to see for myself.

Sure. Nothing to do with Damicar getting hold of some imaginary artefact that would make him the top dog.

What about you? I said to Damicar. Ready to leave everything behind?

Damicar looked a bit worried, but hed been looking like that since Id burned his home to the ground and ripped him free of the only life hed known. Hed get over it.

I am ready, said Damicar, not sounding ready at all. Can I see your food store? Did you get the things I asked for? We all have ways of comforting ourselves. Mine was moving as far as possible from people trying to kill me, Damicars was coming up with new ways to cook an onion. Each to his own.

Yes, yes, said Royn. The supplies have been loaded. Youll have to sort the rest out with the ships cook.

The two of them were quite the couple. Royn was normally very calm and collected when talking, but with Damicar he became irritated quickly and snapped like a teenager asked to do chores hed already done.

I made my way to the captains quarters to get Joshayas message. He had no issue with me going, otherwise he would have stopped me, but I still didnt trust him to leave me unmolested.

Captain Somya stood up as I entered his cabin. It wasnt very big, no large desk covered in maps. There was a bunk, a bedside cabinet, and a small chest at the foot of the bed. That was it. Very modest for a captain.

I have been instructed to relay the message to you directly. His eyes went a misty white, his body stiffened, and then his mouth fell open.

Hello, Colin, said a voice that wasnt the captains, but which was coming from his unmoving mouth.

Um, hel

Sorry I cant be there with you, but Im afraid I have matters that need attending to.

It was like a recorded message, which was a bit weird coming out of a person, but I kind of preferred it. Like when you ring someone hoping to get their answering machine made flesh.

In any case, greetings and welcome to the Eternal Infinite, a fine vessel with

Can you fast forward through this? I asked.

The captain blinked.

...betrayal. We all go through parts of our lives where

Skip.

Not an excuse, but I think this story will help you understand what it means to be a god.

Skip, skip,

My dream is to

Oh, fuck no. Skip ahead to where he says something about what he wants from me.

There was a long, long pause.

We still have an agreement. You promised to release the old gods under the temple, and I intend to hold you to it. But, I can see why you would want to visit Shrine Island first. I assume you have that woman with you, and she will ensure your safe return. Until then, Captain Somya and his men are yours to command. I dont really have any use for them at the moment, and lounging around isnt good for them. Watch out for his m

This time Captain Somya skipped forward without having to be asked.

Just a warning, though. As you get further from Gorgoth, my connection with the crew may become weaker. If this happens, all you need to do is

What? I asked the open-mouthed captain.

His mouth snapped closed. The message ends there. He ran out of time.

All that waffle and he stops there?

It didnt matter, I got the gist of it. Joshaya was scared of Wesley. The rest was all footnotes, and no one ever paid attention to those.

Tell me Captain, are your men willing to fight?

We will do as you command. Well, this was new. Willing, ready, and able. Able!

I had lost my old party, but I was now in possession of a small team of professionals. With two cooks!

The voyage went very smoothly. Two days of sailing with a following wind and good eating. It was like one of those luxury sea cruises, but without an outbreak of gastroenteritis. If ever I had the opportunity to show what I could do without a bunch of plebs holding me back, this was it.

On the morning of the second day, the island hove into view. A tropical paradise, with palm trees and sandy beaches. And around a hundred savages standing on the shore, waiting for us with hungry looks in their eyes.