Chapter 163

163 v. Cabin

“Tell me you have no hand in this at least,” he grabbed her shoulders with such force that she fears there will bruises tomorrow.

“What do you mean?” she tried to appear as innocent as she could.

She knew he was angry. She just didn’t know why exactly. All she did was what will be more beneficial to them both.

“Did you convince the leader to be on board with this project?” his voice did not lower a notch nor did his demeanor change, he was still holding her so tightly in his arms.

“Fucking tell me you were not that stupid to volunteer for this goddamn project!” he couldn’t help but curse.

If anybody else were in his situation, then they will be able to understand his anger and frustrations over this.

The girl who has occupied his heart and mind for years willingly stepped into the line of fire somehow. It wasn’t a fucking good joke.

She was able to convince their leader that she should be used as a pawn in going to Italy, as a front on government officials and customs, and a face for the legitimate business transactions in shipping highly illegal substances and marijuana across the borders.

“What are you so angry about? It is not like I did something wrong?! I did this to benefit us both,” she hissed.

.....

“Why? Do you only really care about yourself, you selfish woman?!” he grunted and held her by her hair, tugging against it as he leaned to her, trapping her in the railings.

They were in the deck of a ship officially labeled as cargo for shipments of grains. But unofficially it was a cargo ship filled with drugs and firearms.

“You are the one being selfish! You asshole!” she started to cry.

“You are hurting me, you are squeezing me so tightly!” she looked sharply at him.

As if cold water has been poured on him, he loosened his grip on her automatically. With a worried look on his face, he took a careful inspection of her shoulders.

“I’m sorry. I was just so frustrated hearing that you will be joining us that I couldn’t think about what was proper or not. I hate that you did this thing,” he caressed her shoulder blades.

His fingers gently touching her skin made her blush, “Don’t cry, please. I really am sorry.”

“It is not like I am going to cry or anything. I was just saying you are holding me so tightly that it hurts,” her voice faltered and so did her emotions.

“Then what are these?” he brushed his fingers against her cheek.

Only then did she realize she has been crying. She felt embarrassed at her moment of weakness that she just lowered her eyes to the ground, unable to say any more of her protests.

“Look at me, please,” his voice was lower now, as if he has really calmed down from the initial shock he has had.

“You have some anger-management issues,” she said, half-meaning her words.

He laughed at how silly it seemed. Because he was a person whose emotions were never shown. In fact, his emotions were well-hidden until now.

“When it comes to you, that is quite true. I must admit at how easily you can change my mood. My anger can soar through the roof but so is my affections,” he said the words, making her blush.

What affections was he talking about? She wanted to counter his words and point out to him the reality of their situation.

They were not supposed to show any affections toward each other. They were in here casually.

She wanted to at least be clarified about that because even her heart seems to be leading her astray. She wants to be able to know where this is all leading them both.

“Please try to understand that you don’t have to do that. You were not supposed to care so much about me. This is just a casual relationship after all,” she pointed out.

He felt his chest tighten after hearing her say that. Why can’t this lady understand anything that involves her will never be just casual to him?

He forced a smile on his lips, “It is my nature to care for my partners. Even if they are nothing more but casual. Think of it this way, I do care about my friends whom I have not even shared a kiss with. How much more about you who wish to share her body with me? If you think of it this way you will realize that my affections are normal,” he of course knew that sounded bullshit.

No way anyone who knew him would believe that. He never cared about his sexual partners. At least not in the way he explained to her just now.

In fact, he has never really cared about another human being the way he cares for her. She is his everlasting love.

That, of course, should remain a secret or he risks losing even this. Whatever this is.

Her face was all red as she nodded urgently. She was quite embarrassed that she has misunderstood him like that.

Of course, he is a gentleman and naturally cares for everyone. Even as a friend he is supposed to care, right?

At least that category she can agree to. They have shared some of their dirty little secrets, some hugs, and kisses. As well as inappropriate touches, well whenever she felt brave enough to ask for them.

He never initiated these things with her. Frankly, she felt a bit insecure since he always ask her to wait a bit more. For whatever that is that she should wait for before he would take her.

She wanted to complain that she had little time. But that is revealing a bit too much about her situation as it is. So she just nods and kept quiet whenever he would bring that up.

Of course, she didn’t want to wait anymore. But he seemed so genuine. Too kind and good that she didn’t want to force him.

She knew it was partly because of his close relations with her father. And partly because of whatever conscience he has and good nature that she wanted so badly to be set aside.

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to be with you during this time. Not being given a time frame for when this project will end, it drives me a bit uncomfortable just waiting,” she confessed.

His face brightened up as he smiled genuinely at her, “Does that mean you care about me, queenie?”

She blushed when he used her username. He really would never let her forget that she once referred to herself as queenie.

If it was others, she will be ridiculed by now. For there is absolutely nothing so queenly about her. Nothing that is worth being praised and compared to a royalty.

If she should rate herself be it physically, intelligence, or talent-wise. She would fall in either a five or a six out of a perfect ten. And that is her being kind to herself.

“Well as you said, it is only natural that I do. No matter how casual this relationship is, I should care about that person giving me his free kisses,” she pouted.

He grinned at her words, “Aye, you should really care about the one giving you that. Amongst other things we will share in the future of course.”

“As if we will ever get past this stage. All you do is stop when things get farther than a few kisses on the lips,” she complained.

Well, in times like this, she feels like he wouldn’t mind her complaints. For he was suddenly in a very happy disposition which is something she clearly wanted to take advantage of.

“Please do not be so concerned about the slow developments. I am only being careful because you are a virgin,” he whispered, placing her hand on top of his crotch, letting her feel the firm evidence of his desire.

She blushed profusely at hearing his words, “Anyone can come here right now and see us in this compromising situation.”

He laughed, “When did you ever care enough about that? I’ll take care of them if we were to be found out.”

“They are members of the yakuza too,” she pointed out, brushing her fingers up and down his clothed member.

He grunted at her teasing, “Fuck, I don’t even know if you are trying to stop me or torture me further.”

“The latter,” she admitted, giggling like a little girl.

He does like that side of her, sweet and childlike during intimate moments such as this, “Since that is your crude intentions, should I at least take my revenge.”

“Mhmm, try to take some revenge, at least it is your job to teach me some manners,” she tiptoed and kissed his lips.

It was bold of her, she knew that. But what can she do when it feels so good to share kisses with him?

No matter what her mind says, she enjoyed these moments with him more than anything. She will never be able to pinpoint exactly why, but her heart felt like it was about to burst from so much happiness.

“Don’t wear this type of clothes in the future. At least not outside,” he whispered, caressing her bruised shoulder which has been exposed in her sleeveless dress.

“Make me regret wearing it then. Or I’ll never learn, master,” it was one of the nicknames she has bestowed on him during this type of interaction shared between them.

It was awkward at first. But since he seemed to enjoy the nicknames she gave him, she has learned to say these titles more freely.

It is also what she wanted anyway. So holding back would be just an utter waste of time.

“Very well said, my little pet. I think you have convinced me enough that I should discipline you further,” his eyes of murky gold focused on hers as he lifted her off the ground, princess- carrying her into his cabin.