The parking lot was silent, with a low voice echoing her ears, and every word was extremely clear, piercing deeply into Cheng Suran's heart.

"If I did it on purpose... I wouldn't tell you the truth..." Jiang Yu said intermittently, and slowly released the hand on her shoulder, and seek support from the wall.

The concrete wall was very cold.

Cheng Suran shivered from breathing: "You can just say so at any time if you want to eat my cooking, why risk your own body? Don't you know that severe allergies can be fatal? Jiang Yu, you..."

She was so angry that she couldn't speak properly, and her shoulders couldn't stop shaking.

Jiang Yu suddenly felt very tired.

She didn't make any more excuses, just said in a low voice: "I'm sorry."

A beam of bright light swept over, and the car slowly stopped beside them. Wen Ruoxian honked the horn, got out of the car, opened the rear door, and helped Cheng Suran support Jiang Yu.

"No need to go to the hospital, I'll be fine in a while," Jiang Yu resisted.

Cheng Suran interrupted sternly, "Shut up!"

Wen Ruoxian looked at her in shock.

The roar reverberated in the empty parking lot, abrupt and ear-piercing. Cheng Suran didn't care much and forced Jiang Yu into the car, and went up herself: "Ruoxian, let's go." 

"Okay." Wen Ruoxian withdrew her gaze .

The nearest hospital is only a three-minute drive from the community.

Sitting in the back seat, Cheng Suran firmly held Jiang Yu's hands to prevent her from scratching the rashes on her body. Although the car was driving smoothly, she was worried that Jiang Yu would not be able to withstand a little shaking, so she tried to let her lean on her.

Her rapid heartbeat slowed down slightly.

Jiang Yu lay limp in Cheng Suran's arms, her skin was red, hot and itchy, her head was dizzy, her stomach was still nauseated, and her breathing unconsciously became more labored.

Listening to her breathing, Cheng Suran vaguely remembered that thrilling night in Lingbai Mountain a few years ago.

At that time, knowing that Jiang Yu was trapped on the mountain, she flew thousands of miles over in the middle of the night, fearing that Jiang Yu would be in danger, so she set foot on the mountain path alone, her eyes were all about Jiang Yu's safety, and she had no extra attention for herself , Even though her thigh was injured and it bled so much, she seemed to feel no pain.

And Jiang Yu just ran down the mountain, struggling and grasping for breath, carrying her who was more than ninety catties.

They already have common memories of wandering on the edge of life and death. They are people who have experienced life and death together. They used to care about each other so much...

Did it start at that time?

Perhaps, even earlier.

But she would rather not know.

Over these five years, she had no idea that Jiang Yu had once liked her, cared for her, or found it difficult to move on. She believed that Jiang Yu had never harbored feelings that went beyond friendship, allowing her to convince herself to accept the reality. However, now that they had reunited, Jiang Yu had mercilessly revealed to her, painfully revealed so much what she hadn't known before.

Why did she have to stab her heart even though she cares about her? Why did she push her away even though she couldn't let her go…

Cheng Suran was brooding.

These days, Jiang Yu is attentive to her in every possible way, which is very different from before. She is both afraid and curious, reminding herself not to fall into it all the time, but her heart is still throbbing for Jiang Yu.

This kind of contradiction tortured her repeatedly, making it more and more difficult for her to be firm...

….

Source: https://www.jjwxc.net/onebook.php?novelid=4738582

This translation is originally posted on

love4baihe.blogspot.com

please read it there. and check out other stories too

They went to the hospital for an emergency treatment.

Jiang Yu's allergic reaction was not particularly serious, but it was not mild either. The doctor prescribed some medicine and asked her to stay for observation in the emergency room for a while. Cheng Suran and Wen Ruoxian also sat down to accompany her.

The three were silent.

Under the bright white light, Jiang Yu closed her eyes, her exposed skin is reddened, her face, neck, and arms were shockingly red, as if she had changed her skin from head to toe.

Cheng Suran gripped her hands tightly, keeping her eyes on her face.

Almost forty years old, so childish, the room full of stuffed animals confirmed it without a doubt. While sighing inwardly, she extended her hand and brushed the broken hair on Jiang Yu's forehead behind her ear.

It's as natural as it has been practiced many times.

Wen Ruoxian watched silently, with some deep meaning in her eyes.

After a long time, probably because of the medicine, the red and swollen bumps on Jiang Yu's body gradually subsided, her skin was no longer hot, and slowly returned to normal color. She felt better, opened her eyes, and said in a hoarse voice:

"Go back, I'll be fine."

Cheng Suran shook her head seriously: "No, the doctor said at least four hours of observation."

Seeing Jiang Yu's expression returning to normal, she quietly breathed a sigh of relief, let go of her hand, got up and poured a glass of water, "Drink some water."

Jiang Yu took two sips, and her throat felt much more comfortable: "What I mean is, I'll just stay here and observe by myself, you guys go back now."

"What if something happens? How can there be no one around?"

"I'll ask Tian Lin to come over."

As she said, she habitually wanted to reach for her phone, but found that her phone was not with her at all. She was rushed to the hospital, and her bag was still at Cheng Suran's house.

"Lend me your phone." She reached out to Cheng Suran.

Cheng Suran stared at her, didn't move, and her face sank: "Jiang Yu, can you be more obedient? You put yourself into the hospital, and now you're acting brave? How many lives do you have that can be abused?" 

The more she talked, the more angry she became, and he raised her hand unconsciously.

She really wants to slap this woman awake!

"Ranran-" Wen Ruoxian grabbed her and pulled her into her arms, "Don't be impulsive, talk carefully."

Cheng Suran gritted her teeth and put down her hand, she's infuriated to death.

Really pissing her off.

This Jiang Yu...

She took a deep breath, turned her face away, and leaned weakly on Wen Ruoxian.

Jiang Yu lowered her eyes and remained silent.

....

After sitting until eleven o'clock in the evening, Jiang Yu had completely returned to normal. The doctor gave some precautions and let her go. Wen Ruoxian drove the car to the entrance of the community, went up to get Jiang Yu's bag, and prepared to send her home.

Jiang Yu's car was still parked at the door, she insisted that Tian Lin come over and drive her own car back, and she refused to let them see her off.

Cheng Suran was too angry with her.

"Are you that afraid that your car will be stolen? Can't you ask your assistant to drive it away tomorrow morning? Are we two ghost? Will we send you to Yama Hall*? Huh? Miss Jiang? Don't get upset. You are thirty-eight years old, not three..." 

*阎罗殿 (yánluódiàn) which is a place in Chinese mythology often associated with the realm of the dead and judgment after death.

She said, then burst into laughter, laughing until her eyes were sore, without caring that Jiang Yu is her client now and using whatever unpleasant words she wanted.

The streetlight cast a faint glimmer in her eyes.

Jiang Yu remained silent, standing motionless, her hand resting on the door of her car, resembling a hollow and soulless puppet.

"Forget it Ranran, let's just listen to Miss Jiang. Wen Ruoxian advised gently. She had never seen Cheng Suran lose her temper like this before, as if she were a different person. There was a vague sense that something was amiss, like being lost in a fog, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it.

Cheng Suran let out a cold snort and was discouraged.

"Fine."

"I'll wait here with her. Ruoxian, go upstairs and get some rest. You still have a meeting tomorrow morning."

"..."

Wen Ruoxian hesitated for a moment, feeling somewhat uneasy. She looked at Cheng Suran, then at Jiang Yu, and her grip on her hand tightened briefly.

Cheng Suran gave her a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, it's okay."

"Call me if you need anything" Wen Ruoxian said as she let go of her hand.

"Okay."

It was already dark.

The neighborhood is still brightly lit, and the bustling nightlife has just begun in the central area of ​​the city.

A gust of cool wind blew over, stirring Jiang Yu's hair at the temples.

Two shadows merged under the street lamp.

Jiang Yu stared at the lights in the distance, her dark eyes were dyed bright, as if floating with water, showing loneliness, desolation, and a little bit of sadness.

"Didn't you not trigger your allergies on purpose?" Cheng Suran stared at her for a long time, then whispered.

Jiang Yu was startled, turned her face slowly, and asked without answering, "Ranran, do you believe me?"

"..."

"If you believe, then I didn't. If you don't believe, then I did. Actually, there's no need to ask me."

"I want you to say the accurate answer out loud."

"I didn't."

"Then you just needed a few bites, was it necessary to eat so much?"

"I ate a lot of each dish."

"The yam the most!" Cheng Suran almost shouted those four words. She still couldn't believe her.

Jiang Yu stared at her silently, her eyes slightly reddening, and suddenly, she let out a self-deprecating laugh.

At that time, she was full of anticipation waiting for the meal, looking at the table full of delicacies, she had never eaten carbs for dinner, she wished she could take it all away, and only have it for herself, because she thought that Wen Ruoxian could often eat the meals that Ranran cooked, while she may have only this one chance, she was unwilling to share it with others even a bit.

Only yam was avoided.

She knew that she was allergic to yam, and her whole body would itch after eating it.

She also felt Ranran's glances from time to time.

Perhaps wondering why she wasn't eating the yam, or maybe suspecting that her cooking wasn't good enough... There were countless guesses swirling in her mind, thoughts repeating over and over. Yet, Ranran didn't ask.

She thought, maybe she should eat a little, but then thought, maybe she should just tell Ranran the truth.

She also wondered if being honest would make Ranran feel guilty for not asking about her taste preferences in advance, if it would make the atmosphere at the table awkward, if it would... She had so many thoughts running through her mind.

She was just a guest, if it wasn't for Wen Ruoxian, how could Ranran agree to let her stay for dinner.

She hesitated when she put down her chopsticks.

But she ate.

Finally, Ranran asked. At that moment, she was glad that she had eaten not showing any cracks. Her praise made Ranran happy, and she wanted to see her smile...

Oh well.

It was also her own fault, so there is no need to explain further.

Talk, why aren't you talking? Are you feeling guilty? Cheng Suran is aggressive.

At that moment a taxi stopped at the door.

The back seat door opened and Tian Lin got out of the car, looked around, and walked their way: "Sister Yu-–"

"What's the matter? You said you didn't feel well on the phone?"

She looked at Jiang Yu, and then at Cheng Suran. They hadn't seen each other for a few years, and the girl who was once green and immature had become more sophisticated and grown, and she looked much more mature.

For a moment, she overlooked the tense atmosphere between the two of them.

"It's nothing," Jiang Yu smiled and shook her head, handing her the car keys. "Let's go back." Then she waved towards Cheng Suran, "Ranran, good night."

Cheng Suran: "..."

"Oh, okay," Tian Lin took the keys, nodded at Cheng Suran, and got into the driver's seat. Jiang Yu smoothly turned around and got into the car.

Watching the car go away slowly, after a long time, Cheng Suran came back to her senses, as if a piece of her heart had been hollowed out, feeling a sharp pain.

She turned around and walked into the gate of the community. As she walked, her pace quickened.

....

The living room was illuminated, and the sound of an electric toothbrush hummed from the bathroom. Without bothering to change her slippers, Cheng Suran hurriedly entered the kitchen, and there on the stove, she saw a plate with leftovers.

Stir-fried yam and shredded pork in garlic sauce were plated together, with more yam left than shredded pork.

The other three dishes were completely finished.

Cheng Suran was taken aback.

"Ranran."

The sound from the bathroom stopped, Wen Ruoxian came out in her pajamas, and looked around the living room: "Has Miss Jiang gone back? Seeing the light in the kitchen, Cheng Suran was standing there in a daze, she stepped forward in doubt: "What's wrong, Ranran?"

She followed Cheng Suran's gaze.

Leftovers?

"Ruoxian..." Cheng Suran looked up, suddenly grabbing her arm. "Which dish do you think Jiang Yu liked the most tonight? Have you noticed?"

Wen Ruoxian was taken aback, thought carefully, and said, "Boiled beef? There are also spicy chicken wings. I only ate one. It's too spicy. If you didn't eat it, then Miss Jiang ate it." She pointed to the dishwasher.

Empty dishes were cleaned.

Boiled beef and spicy chicken wings are both meat dishes, which are quite spicy. The shredded pork in garlic sauce also had a bit of chili in it. The only non-spicy dishes are stir-fried yam and water spinach.

She and Ranran don't like spicy food very much, but the three dishes tonight are spicy. She guessed that Jiang Yu likes spicy food and thought Cheng Suran made it to cater to the taste of the guest, so she has no objection.

"Impossible... I remember she ate a lot of yam..." Cheng Suran muttered to herself.

"But we ate it too, and there are still some leftovers from the yam." Wen Ruoxian frowned, trying hard to recall the dinner, thinking about it, she always felt that something was weird.

"Wait, neither you nor I knew about her yam allergy, but earlier at the hospital... she knew it herself?"

She finally realized what's been off.

"Really? Right, we ate it too, and there's still some left..." Cheng Suran's voice trembled, her face turning pale. In an instant, her mind became a mess, all jumbled up like porridge.

She usually cooks small portions, and each dish is just enough to finish. Tonight, there are three people eating, and the amount of dishes is slightly more.

At the dinner table, she watched Jiang Yu several times, and every time she saw Jiang Yu picking up yams, if she ate yam the most, the plate should've been as clean as a CD.

How can there be any left?

"Ranran, do you suspect that she deliberately ate..."

Wen Ruoxian hadn't finished speaking when Cheng Suran suddenly pushed her aside, ran outside, and rushed into her room, slamming the door shut with a loud "bang."

The whole room fell into silence.

The clock on the living room wall ticked away, completing a full circle with a "tick-tock".

Wen Ruoxian stared at the leftovers thoughtfully.

From home to the hospital, and back, Cheng Suran's nervousness was beyond her imagination. She had known Ranran for so many years, but she had never seen such a panicked expression, such a tender gaze, a mixture of helplessness and frustration. It was not at all like ordinary friends who have not been in touch for many years.

Could it be..

Her heart is in turmoil, and couldn't help guessing with a filter.

....

The light in the bedroom was not turned on, Cheng Suran lay on the bed sobbing, the surroundings were so quiet that her ears were ringing, her body completely melted into the darkness.

The sheets were soon soaked with tears.

What's up with her?

How did she become like this?

How could she be so sensitive, how could she care so much about Jiang Yu's every move, and how could she be so anxious that her memory would be confused? She was the one who doubted Jiang Yu, she was the one who misunderstood Jiang Yu, and she was the one who misconstrued Jiang Yu.

This is Jiang Yu, that is Jiang Yu, Jiang Yu is everywhere, all because of Jiang Yu...

All efforts, all hints, are in vain. She bid farewell to the past, but still missed the person in the past, she let go of the knot in her heart, but she did not let go of the person in her heart, she clearly decided to be a stranger to Jiang Yu for the rest of her life.

She was like a struggling fish trapped in a whirlpool, the more she swam desperately to get away, the more she was pulled and tugged by that force.

It would be great if Jiang Yu didn't appear in her life.

Cheng Suran turned her face sideways, wiped her tears, her nose was blocked and she could only breathe through her mouth, rising and falling, the pent-up frustration building up inside her body, swelling and erupting.

Blaming herself, it was her fault. She wasn't firm enough, always soft-hearted, compromising time and time again, allowing Jiang Yu to breach her defenses repeatedly. It was these actions that led her to this situation.

What client? What business partners? They're nothing like that at all.

She can't lie to herself any longer.

Cheng Suran got up, opened the closet, pulled out all the clothes Jiang Yu had customized for her, found a paper bag and stuffed them indiscriminately.

Then she turned into the study next door, picked up the unfinished model, and put on her bag. "Ranran, where are you going?" Wen Ruoxian came out of the kitchen.

"Throwing garbage."

Cheng Suran went out without looking back.

….

Late at night.

The light was very dim, and Jiang Yu sat on the bay window in her pajamas, holding a rabbit doll in her arms, most of her body was engulfed in shadows, her eyes were dull, and she kept playing with the rabbit ears.

Tian Lin sat on the small sofa diagonally opposite her, and sighed one after another after listening to her ins and outs.

"You forgot about the last time you accidentally ate yam and got covered in rashes? Just be straightforward and tell her, she'll understand. Why overthink it? You're being too silly."

"Ai."

Jiang Yu lowered her head, rubbed the rabbit's ears with her fingertips, and said softly: "I thought it would be just a rash like last time, and it would be fine after a while. They asked me to eat fruit. I wanted to stay for a few minutes longer, I didn't expect it to be severe this time."

"How could it not be severe? It could even be life-threatening!" Tian Lin scolded sternly.

"..."

"Sister Yu, it's not worth it."

Her words were interrupted by the ringing of a phone.

It was from the security office.

Jiang Yu answered the call, and the security guard informed her that a woman named Cheng Suran was visiting and they needed to verify the information. She paused for a moment, finding it somewhat unbelievable, and replied, "Yes, she's my friend. Please bring her up."

Her voice quivered, whether from excitement or nervousness.

Tian Lin looked puzzled, "Who is it? Coming to see you at this hour?"

"It's Ranran..."

"?!"

Jiang Yu threw away the rabbit doll, got down from the bay window, and ran out of the bedroom barefoot. Within minutes, the doorbell rang.

She couldn't wait to open the door.

Cheng Suran stood outside blankly, her lips were tightly pursed, and ice was condensed in her eyes.

The security guard nodded and left.

"Ranran, what are you..." Jiang Yu inexplicably had a bad premonition.

Cheng Suran raised the bag in her hand: "Miss Jiang, thank you for your kindness, but I still don't want the clothes." She bent down and put the bag by the door, and weighed another cardboard box, "And this is the model."

She opened the carton and took out the contents.

"Since we have bid farewell to our past identities, there is no need to restore the things I gave you in the past, let alone exist, so we can just dispose of them."

After finishing speaking, Cheng Suran took off the transparent box, raised the model and smashed it hard on the ground.

In an instant, it broke into pieces, scattered all over the place.

Shattered into countless pieces.

Jiang Yu's heart shattered as well.