CH 59.1

“Starting tomorrow, the housekeeping lady will come.”

Woo-hyun said in the meanwhile.

“Alright.”

It was his decision whether to call someone or not, so Yoo-hwa responded with indifference. The trivial conversation ended. Nevertheless, she could see from the corner of her eye that Woo-hyun’s gaze didn’t leave her. It seemed like if there was any weight to his gaze, she would have been crushed. In the end, Yoo-hwa, unable to bear it anymore, looked up and faced Woo-hyun. The gaze that felt heavy just until a moment ago felt a little different now.

Contrary to her desire to ask him why he was staring at her, Yoo-hwa was distracted by Woo-hyun’s wet hair. The ends were slightly drying up, so it seemed that he had showered around the same time as her. Since she used the hair dryer, it seemed that Woo-hyun, the owner, was not able to use it.

“Dry your hair.”

She would rather be comfortable eating alone while he did so.

“Then it will be too late for dinner.”

“You seem to care a lot about meal times.”

Come to think of it, even when he was her neighbor, Woo-hyun ate lunch on time. At the words she said out of recollection, Woo-hyun’s chopsticks, picking up a side dish, stopped in the air. Woo-hyun, who rolled his eyes for a moment as if she had hit the bullseye, gave a light nod.

“I never ate on time at home when I was young.”

“…”

“I’m trying to do that now.”

To let himself know that he was living differently from how he previously lived, at any given moment.

Although his words were simple, the weight they contained wasn’t light. Yoo-hwa stopped chewing at the unexpected words and looked at Woo-hyun. They didn’t seem to be words that came out of Woo-hyun, who was eating while sitting upright.

“I’m surprised.”

Yoo-hwa spat out the words without even realizing it, and then bit her lips. She unconsciously said something unnecessary. It was something that could easily become the start of a conversation.

“Why? Do I not look like I lived like that?”

Woo-hyun asked a little more comfortably than before, as if he would not miss the opportunity.

“… Yeah. You never expressed those feelings before, and you never looked like that.”

“Living in that house was uncomfortable, but it wasn’t awkward. Because I have always lived like that.”

“…”

“Do you understand how I lived with this much explanation?”

She knew where the house was at once. He was referring to the shabby house where he used to live with her as his neighbor. He said that the old and worn-out house, which didn’t have a single spot that wasn’t damaged, wasn’t awkward. As if he had been through it for a long time and was used to it.

Seeing Yoo-hwa speechless and taken aback, Woo-hyun put down the spoon. Then, he spoke with earnest eye contact.

“I was used to ramyeon rather than rice, and after my stepmother came, I was able to get meals, but they were all at different times. My stepmother worked, and the side dishes were almost always the same. My father made money, but he was also a person who often got into trouble… Plus, with two kids, it must have been difficult to make a living. Barely enough to pay the rent, pay the kids’ tuition, and pay the utility bills. Going out to eat was difficult, and buying a pizza was a dream. So the first thing I did with the money I made while working part-time in middle school was to buy a pizza.”

Woo-hyun spoke in a calm tone as if he was talking about someone else. Because of that, Yoo-hwa seemed to have something stuck in her throat even though she had swallowed the rice.

She had a faint feeling of what life had been like for him. A life of loneliness and poverty that was not so different from her own.

Yoo-hwa, who was going to collapse in the face of her rapidly forming sympathy, hardened her expression as if trying to calm down her emotions.

“Why are you telling me that all of a sudden?”

“I know your story roughly, but I don’t think I ever told you my story.”

She tried to ask what that had to do with it.

“That.”

“…”

“… I regret it.”

Hearing Woo-hyun’s following words, the words she was going to say crumbled away inside her mouth. His slow-talking lips and the direction of his head, fixed on her— all of that seemed to be hardened; however, waves seemed to be hitting Woo-hyun’s eyes as he looked at her. Numerous emotions rushed in like the rising tide and quickly escaped like the falling tide.

Yoo-hwa could not properly read any of those emotions.

However.

She had a faint hunch that that was not the only thing he regretted. And that he couldn’t bear to tell the truth. Yoo-hwa, who was choking, quietly lowered her gaze and looked at the steaming bowl of rice in front of her.

As a child, there were times when she liked to just be given warm rice. Because it was proof that her mother was at home. Whenever her mother had to go out to work or go out, there was bread on the table. So, when she saw warm rice, she used to be happy and eat in a hurry. She burned her mouth whenever that happened and belatedly regretted it.

That was also what she was feeling right now.

She felt hungry for the warm rice that she found after a long time.

Yoo-hwa, who had made up her shaky mind, looked at Woo-hyun more coldly than before.

“… You don’t have to regret it. I’m not curious anymore.”

“Then think of it as a late reply. I don’t have a book I can give you to make you understand me, so I’m telling you this.”

Ah.

Yoo-hwa lamented inwardly.

She shouldn’t have asked.

She shouldn’t have done that.