Chapter 152

The last time she visited it, it was only a small flower garden because it was under construction,

but it was now complete, full of lots of stuff, including a cage for Poibe, tea tables, a few books and an easel.

Marianne opened the greenhouse. The inside of the greenhouse was all red and green with the sunset streaming in all over the place. Her beloved lilies were lined up, basking in the evening light. The providence of the universe, penetrating through the flawless glass, created a dark shadow after her.

“… Pretty,” she consciously said.

It was a beautiful landscape, and she uttered exclamations with her mouth, but she didn’t feel any happiness. Rather, her neck felt sore and chilly.

In the end, Marianne gave up on the walk. Instead, she sat down in front of the lily bed.

Although her long skirt dragged on the ground, there was no one here who would point out her behavior that didn’t suit a noblewoman.

She sat down and looked at the flower bed. She recited one sentence like a spell.

“I’m okay. I’m okay. Everything will be fine.”

She knew better than anyone that she would be okay just by repeating like that. Still, she repeated the same words again and again. If she didn’t, she felt so stuffy and felt as if she were suffocated.

Kader, who she met in her unconscious, told her to move forward. She said it was her destiny to move forward even if she fell and broke down. She said if she fought without fear, she would protect her with Anthea all the time.

Of course, even if Kader had not made that promise, she would have been willing to move forward. She did not have the slightest intention to forgive Ober from the beginning. She never intended to retreat because of fear. This was a fight where she had no choice but to be killed unless she beheaded the enemy, regardless of whether she would retreat, run or stick it out.

That is why she strongly appealed to Kader to keep her promise. The more weapons of all kinds, the better for her.

“I’m really okay… No, I am not okay at all, but I should be okay…”

Marianne pulled her knees up and wrapped her head in the small space between her knees.

Soon, her cheeks became wet with tears.

Obviously, her life was not so sad. After she met Kader in her dream, she sometimes felt her emotions becoming less sensitive than before.

Marianne no longer struggled with sorrow like she did that evening. She never cried or got angry in and out of season. The anger that struck her like a tidal wave gradually became more subdued. She now admitted and accepted her mother’s death, her father’s betrayal, and the past days when she couldn’t do anything.

But that didn’t mean that she was okay. She was a bit less okay than she looked and she wanted to cry just a little bit more, if possible.

It seemed that there was a certain amount of sadness allotted for each person when faced with despair. She was okay during the day, but she cried when it got dark.

‘It was good that I told them I wanted to be alone.”

Tears dropped on her dress while she was lost in such thoughts. It would take some time for her swollen eyes to subside. She didn’t want to worry the others.

She didn’t know how long she cried.

The reddish setting sun disappeared, and night fell. Her wet eyes were dry for a long time.

She felt a cold night breeze flowing through the open door.

Right at that moment, she heard a familiar voice flowing from behind.

“Marianne!”

Marianne immediately realized that it was Eckart’s voice.

His voice calling her name had some loneliness in it. It was a cold but sweet voice.

Now, even when she was asleep, she could see whose voice it was.

She straightened her curled shoulders and raised her head.

“Your Majesty!” She slowly looked back with a slightly subdued voice.

But there was no one at the door of the greenhouse. There was no long shadow or any lingering smell of the northern wind.

“Fool.”

Instead, it was Poibe which trotted to her with its small feet.

“… Phebe. I was surprised.”

Marianne sighed and turned back to the flower bed. She threw a little tantrum.

Poibe shook its head once and flew. After a quick glance over the lily flower bed, Poibe again settled on her hem. As if it felt good, its smooth wings fluttered a couple of times.

“Do not play like that in the future.”

“Beep.”

“You’re at it again! You know how to imitate the human language, but you pretend you can’t when you are scolded, right?”

“Mar-ri. Fool.”

“Okay. Don’t say that I’m a fool.”

Marianne gently stroked Poibe’s white body. Its warmth melted away her cold-hearted reason.

“When I hear your voice… I miss you…”

It was she herself who said she would never meet anyone. Nothing would be different even if she met them.

‘Shouldn’t I meet Daddy to persuade him to apologize and do something for his past actions?’

But she was avoiding her father as she was not strong enough to ask him. As a result, she didn’t have anything to say to her father even if she met him.

“If I want to see the emperor, I think I have to ask Daddy about it tomorrow, right? Anyway, I can’t keep avoiding him anyway. And I should begin to see Ober again…”

“His Majesty.”

While it was murmuring while stroking its feathers, Poibe this time mimicked Marianne’s voice.

“Okay, His Excellency. How come you listen to me now? I know you’re not a good bird.”

“I miss you.”

“Yeah, I miss him. But not yet. I’m just ashamed to do so. Let me go and see him after I see my father and get his permission first. If I go and apologize to the emperor, won’t he forgive me?”

“His Majesty!”

“Got it. Do you want to go with me to the palace, Phebe? Although you’re a bad bird, let me take you there. Do you want to see Sir Curtis?”

“Fool. His Excellency!”

Poibe rolled its little feet over her dress as if it were unhappy. It even pecked her fingers stroking its head. Its white wings fluttered frantically.

“Phoebe. What is it? You don’t like something…”

Even before she finished talking, a slightly heavy, long robe covered her shoulders.

Wrapped around her was a dark robe. As if someone was wearing it until a moment ago, she smelled the faint scent of the owner of the warm coat: the cold smell from a mix of snow and wind on a cold winter day.

If the smell could be named at all, it could be called loneliness.

“Your Excellency.”

Marianne looked back, grabbing the collar of the robe. In its place that didn’t move at all was a long, hanging line.

“Marianne!”

This time, not Poibe, but the real Eckart called her name.

“It’s still cold at night.”

Marianne bit her lips at his voice.

‘Your Majesty, why do you always appear whenever I’m struggling? Why do you make me realize that I’m not okay? Why do you look so lonely and so friendly to make me so helpless?’

When she opened her mouth, she wanted to ask her questions like that, so she just let out a little sigh instead of asking why. He got up while holding his hand.

Eckart waited silently while she got up and adjusted her dress.

Marianne did not look at his face until she buttoned her robe. She slowly checked his complexion, and then opened his left hand.

“Oh, you had your left hand treated!”

“… Yes.”

“Do your arms and back feel okay?”

“… Okay.”

“Are you eating well?”

“… I just manage to eat.”

There was a short conversation between them.

“What a relief.”

Marianne laughed faintly. Eckart knitted his brows on her behalf.

“Marianne, this isn’t the time to worry about me.”

“I’m okay.”

“…”

“I’m serious. Look. I’m fine.”

“You don’t have to pretend to be calm. When the day breaks, you can pretend to be calm as much as you can, but you don’t have to now.”

Marianne laughed a little brighter at his words.

“Wow, I’m amazed the day has come when you are telling me that. In Roshan, it was me who asked you all the time…”

“…”

“I think the world is worth living a little longer, right?”

Marianne bent her eyes, teasing him as usual. Knowing that she was not qualified to stand in front of him, she was seeing him face to face as if she felt relaxed.

That’s why she realized a little later that his eyes were trembling.

“Oh, don’t worry. I’m just kidding. I’ve been wearing no earrings and necklaces these days. There’s only one thing that I can swallow…”

Marianne raised her left hand. The Kimmel ring wrapped up in her middle finger glistened in the dim moonlight.

“This is too precious to swallow because this is one and only ring in the world.”

She put down her hand and looked down.

Along with the raised hand, her gaze fell down.

With her head down, Marianne slowly touched her engagement ring. Indeed, it was her ardent and careful touch.

While looking at her quietly, he opened his mouth as if he had decided on something.

“Marianne!”