Chapter 88 - You treat your life like it’s nothing!

"When I was in Japan, before I got the tattoo. I was the helper though, I'm not the one to made it to be completely honest. Old man Kaiseki made it for me, I've known him since I was a kid. I remember the processes exactly in my head but I've never really tried making one solo yet. We'd need different tools from what we have here though like a forge and an anvil. Those different types of hammers too, we could use power tools but that defeats the point of making it authentic. What we have here is more of building or repairing structures or vehicles." I explained.

I saw someone approach from the back and he tapped me.

"W-wait, I'm the engineer here, are you saying that making that is uncool?! It looks awesome for f.u.c.ks sake!" Raphael said while he pointed at the SUV he's working on.

"Well, that looks f.u.c.k.i.n.g awesome. More, if it gets finished. I'm talking about martial weapons not like the guns that we have. Heck, just make something that you like. This is just a personal preference for me." I said.

"Oh, I thought you were shitting on my work. Hah! My bad, my bad." Raphael said as he continued on working on the SUV.

"After you're done with that, I have another project in mind. I'd like to have a huge smelter made. We have a lot of scrap metal here. If we identify each one, we could make new weapons or more bullets with it. I have a small one for melting lead scraps from the range but I want something bigger." I said to Raphael.

"H-hey! Easy now! I'm still not done with this thing and you want to pile on more?! Let me finish this one first before you tell me what's next!" he exclaimed while smiling.

I smiled as I tried walking towards the fence but Kaley pulled me.

"Hey! I'm serious! Take a break for once!" she exclaimed.

I helplessly smiled and said, "Okay, let's have a date then! Know how to fish?"

"Umm, not really. A date huh? We never actually did that yet… sure!" she said as she smiled.

I grabbed my tacklebox and a few other gears and we two headed to the fishing areas. I dug up some bait first and I showed her how to place it on the hook and she followed it perfectly. We sat inside on one of the small houses at the middle of the fishing area and we could already see a few swimming at a few spots. I tied a floater before the three hooks in the line and I casted it in the water.

"Okay, this is a spin casting rod and just do the same motion that I did." I said.

The line flew a few meters away from mine and the floaters started on bobbing up and down.

"What do we do next?" she asked.

"Wait for a tug, if you feel it, immediately pull the rod and- wait!" I shouted as I pulled the rod backwards.

"You caught one?!" Kaley shouted.

"Yeah! Watch how I do it yeah?" I said as I give a bit of slack to the line since the fish is still fighting. I reeled a bit and I started pulling against the direction it was going. A few moments later, it got tired and I easily reeled it in and I placed it in a bucket filled with water.

"That was exciting, where did you learn to fish? Did you take classes too?" she asked.

"Oh, I learned from my grandfather on my mother's side. When I was little, we had a fishing boat in the provinces and he used to take me fishing every morning. Sometimes, we'd be in the boat for a few days and we eat what we caught since we only have rice in the Styrofoam containers that we brought." I said.

"That's nice, hey, about earlier…" she trailed.

"Hmm? I told you, don't worry about it." I said.

"Please listen, I'm serious here. I'm very sorry for what I did. I think I wouldn't be that confident on doing this thing again. Not only did I put your life at risk, I've also put everyone else too. And now we're just fishing like nothing has happened..." She said.

"I said it's alright right? Don't beat yourself over it." I replied.

I saw her rod lowering and she looked at me with a frown. Her breathing became erratic as she yelled.

"Why are you not mad at me?! You yelled at Mark when he disobeyed orders right? Yell at me or something will you?!" she exclaimed.

I gave a long sigh. We laid our rods on the floor.

"Nothing bad happened right? Isn't that all that matters? We have everyone there to help-"

"That's not the point I was saying! You treat your life like it's nothing! You have people here that need you!" she yelled.

"…" I was speechless.

She stared at the ground while she's hugging her knees. I was sitting with my legs crossed and I was just looking at her. We sat in silence; I just noticed her cheeks getting invaded by the tears flowing from her eyes.

"Kaley… I don't know how to say this. Ever since my parents died, I think I've lost something in here." I tapped my temple.

"It's a weird feeling, like something snapped or something broke off. I can't explain it properly. I don't know, sometimes I feel like I can't die." I added.

"What do you mean?" she said quietly as she sniffs.

"Not really sure, it's weird to me as well. Have you ever had that feeling when what you have studied the night before your exam was exactly the one in the papers? You have experienced that right?" I said then she nodded.

"Like when you feel that everything is under control. That's what I was feeling earlier, that time when the fence fell when Mark disregarded orders was a different case. You did what I told you and what's at fault there was Diego." I said.

"I was the one who took him inside, didn't I?" she asked.

"True, you did. I'm not against users even if one of them killed both my parents. Some of them could change if given enough time. That guy earlier just made a very stupid decision to pick drugs over his life. If you think about it, we did everyone a favor by killing him when he reacted violently. Remember the talk earlier by doing something evil for something good? This is a small example of it." I said.

"W-wait, you're changing the subject! We're talking about you here! You can say that you feel invincible and all that but you're still the same as us. You'd still bleed, you'd still have broken bones and you could still die..." she said earnestly as she looked at me.

"She got me good..." I said to myself.

"I really don't want to remember things as much back then but this photographic memory really sucks sometimes. Do you know what's really hard after losing your parents? Trying to live after losing them. The trip that I planned to cool my head off? I'm actually tethered by a rope at each side pulling at me. One side really wants me to live on while the other..." I trailed.

Her head immediately snapped towards my direction and then she cried once more.

"Please don't continue what you're saying. I-I'm sorry for bringing it up. M-mom should be here talking to you a-about this stuff not m-me." she stuttered as she tries to complete what she wants to say.

"Hey, I'm fine now aren't I? It's a thing of the past and I wouldn't pick that card, not anymore. There's too much that I have to live for now just to throw it all away." I said as I wiped the tears from her eyes.

"..." she was silent.

"And as I was about to say earlier, we have each other's back yeah? When Mark made a mistake, I corrected it. When Diego made his, Tatiana corrected it. Nobody's perfect, well…" I trailed.

Her head lifts up.

"…except for you." I said while grinning.

*flick*

*snag*

"OW! KALEY! WHAT THE F.U.C.K! SHIT!" I exclaimed.

"OMG! OMG! I'M SO SORRY!!!" she yelled.

What happened was she flicked the rod towards my direction and then the hook flew and it pierced my ear.

"Oh no! What do we do?! Do we pull it out?!" she exclaimed.

"No! See the end of the hook here? The small nub at the end? That's why we use this for fish since they won't be able to wriggle of it since their mouth will rupture when they pull. Why are we even talking like we're having a lesson here? Let's stop by Alex's place to borrow pliers or something. Cut the line first!" I yelled.

"Okay, okay, hold on…" she stammered.

"If you cut me with that too, oh boy…" I said.

"Please don't talk, my hands are shaking." she stammered.

*snip*

The fishing line was now cut and then I tidied up the fishing equipment first and we started to walk towards Alex's house.

*ding* *dong*