Chapter 30 - 30. How long.....

It started as amusement, a little prank on her but watching her closing herself, again and again, led him to lose control over himself.....

He had lost his rationality....

The incidents of yesterday and today, her continued rejection of her emotions, her ignorance, her years when he was not beside her and didn't know of, that man...and many many things ticked him off to no avail and it all went loose at this very moment.

As his calloused thumb rubbed over her soft wet lips, his mind went haywire thinking of their taste; as his dark eyes looked over her beautiful collarbone and slightly exposed cleavage, all he could think of was marking them for all to see, making her his and he was very close to fulfilling it.

After he had asked about kissing her, her visibly startled expression, her slightly parted lips, her shocked but twinkling eyes made him go closer to her.

He had already lost control over his body for a while now.

He closed the distance between there faces to a few centimeters when he heard her call his name in a shaky voice, "Xu-Xuan....Xuan...?"

It seems she was slightly scared as it was not every day that he heard this kind of emotions from her voice, it was either flat or it was doting towards him, never had it held fear.

His mind cleared up as that slight change was enough to bring him back to his senses, a small light shone through his dark eyes as he restrained his desires for the Nth time.

He could never force himself on her, she should never be treated like that, his conscience came back.

He took a deep breath inside and closed the distance again to bare millimetres, when he saw her shrink her head and close her eyes, he almost let go himself but he didn't want to scare her anymore, he just gave a light peck on her cheek and shifted his head, as he, flipped his body to the side beside her and started laughing loudly, scaring the hell out of her.

.........

When he shifted his body to hover above her, she had lost her cool for a second but watching him stay like that for a lengthened period she thought of fleeing because no matter what, she was a girl in her prime.

Being in this compromising position with a breathtaking man with a disheveled but wild look, no matter her self control and one track brain of "he only thinks of me as his sister", she couldn't help but think in a certain way and that too, when the man over her was the man of her life, before she gave some weird reaction, she took the choice of fleeing.

When he had asked her about kissing, watching those soul-sucking darkened eyes and that evil grin she realised for the first time that XuanXuan was also a man, an enticing one at that.

Her love for him was, of course, the type where she wanted to be beside him for her lifetime; call it her cowardice or low self-esteem but she never thought of what would happen next, of course, she wanted him whole and was ready to offer herself, her heart, body, and soul, her everything to him but she never thought of him wanting her back and was never able to see or think of such a side of him.

Just the thought of him already grown up and that the man over her being the 'XuanXuan' she knew of; the sudden changes in him, scared her for the first time.

She was scared of this side of him, it was a 'him', who she didn't know about.....

But that was no all, just the thought of being taken by such a 'him' which made a certain part of heart glad and yearn for it to happen, was scaring her more.

She was losing her control too.

Her expectations, her insecurities, the man over her, everything was scaring her into shrinking her head.

She didn't know that when she had called him out his expression changed, she was too scared to take notice of it, or on the matter, think of anything but before she knew it he was beside her and was laughing loudly which was very rare of him, yes, even in her presence he rarely laughed like this where his body shook, it's has been a long long while.

She softly stuttered out his name again, "XuanXuan.." as she put her hand over the place he had kissed.

He took hold of his emotions again and stopped laughing for a bit.

"Linlin, so cute...hahahahaha....", he got up from his position and again shifted to beside her.

He propped his hand and placed his jaw over it and laid side-wise beside her, moving his free hand through her hairs, he still had a slight smile but it didn't scare her anymore, he was back to normal, to the XuanXuan she knew of, she sighed in relief.

He continued, "I was just intending to joke for a bit but watching you so scared....hahahahaha...." he gave a quick peck on her cheek and continued, "I'm sorry, you looked so cute that I couldn't control myself."

He was actually joking now but to get her to normal, he didn't mind making his desires a joke.

She lightly hit his shoulder to which he dramatically, "ouch" ed.

"Dubuqi...dubuqi", he said without meaning it.

She was relieved that it was all a joke and she was too scared just now to scold him for what he did, she just shook her head; of course she was slightly disappointed too, but let it go and got up to prepare their dinner, she let it pass because she didn't want to think too much about it.

She wanted to hide this moment they shared in the deepest part of her heart, she didn't want to think much as she hadn't wanted it all to be a joke so, she still chose to flee....

............

As he watched her fleeing the scene like a rabbit, he smiled but his eyes were glazed with light frost, "Just how long should I wait, Meilin?"

.........

They had a light dinner of Omurice.

Throughout the dinner no one talked about anything, it seems, they were busy sorting out their own feelings.

After washing the dishes, she got ready to head back....

He decided to take her back in the name of taking an 'evening stroll' to help him metabolise the food.

She knew he was adamant and didn't say anything to reject the idea.

When he went to grab his trench coat from his room, she messaged the bodyguards to be on standby and asked them to get the car to her building before they got there.

She didn't like bodyguards to watch over her when she commutes but when it came to him, even an army of them was too little, his safety was her highest priority.

.......

When they reached her building he bent down to kiss her cheeks, it seems he got used to it and even though her heart was not ready yet, she didn't have it in herself to push him away or ask him to stop it.

She signaled the bodyguards to bring the car over and asked him to get into it, he pouted a little but went through it.

She bade him a "good night" and after the car was out of her sight she went inside the building as well.

Atsuki's corner...

The forgotten cake: "....."