Chapter 55 - The things I've missed

"I got married two years ago and is now a happy father of an eight months old son. He is the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm so grateful. My wife, Elisa, is the sweetest thing," he held the front door open for us. I just stared at his unshaven face and dark shadows under his eyes. I couldn't reconcile the cute kid he was back then with that stranger standing before me.

"Liliane?" called Grant beside me. I slowly turned to him. My fingers held firmly on his hand. "It's ok, you can go in," I simply nodded without understanding what he was saying. I was scared of that house. The corridor led to what I remembered was the living room found on the left. My heart hammered inside and threatened to stop at the slightest movement of the wind.

"She's waiting for you in her room," said Thomas. I gasped and faced him. My vision slowly wobbled. Grant rubbed my back to calm me. I shook my head and stepped inside. It took all the strength in my body to walk until the living room. The corridor was completely bare, just faded blue walls. The same color extended to the small living room. Grant dropped my bag next to the door. There was an odd sensation about this…whole place. Like time stopped. The same curtain from that day I went to the station with the Doctor, hang from the two windows facing the yard. The same ugly green carpet that mom hated so much. The same cupboard filled with dusty souvenirs and glasses no one ever used. The same mass-produced painting of serene lake views hung on the far wall.

The only difference was the photos hanging on the opposite wall. A dozen frames depicted our family when we were still happy, all four of us. We took it on my ten's birthday; I remembered that it was the only one we actually invited my friends from school. It was never the same after that. The second one was in the picture of my parent's wedding. When mom still looked like a princess, before the hardship of working in the field stripped her of all the light from her sparkling grey eyes. The others were foreign, Thomas at graduation. A solemn picture of the three wearing all black. Pictures of Thomas' wedding and finally the newborn baby. I paused in the middle of the room.

"Wait, here. I'll check if she's awake," said Thomas as he disappeared back into the corridor. His loud footsteps echoed up the stairs followed by a creaking door. I stood by the worn-out leather couch that had an indent on the right cushion facing a TV screen from another era. The armrest bare years of scratches. The leather almost peeled away from it. On the little table was a pair of black-rimmed glasses. I quickly averted my eyes.

"Grant!" I called in a choked voice.

-What's wrong?

"I-I need support…" I said in a whisper. He took me in his arms rubbing me back.

"Hey, Princess. I'm here," he kissed my hair.

-I'm here too. Sorry, I was busy with dealing with that riot.

Demos' voice and Grant's hug helped keep my broken pieces together. I took deep breaths to keep the shivers at bay. I wrapped my arms around Grant holding on dear life. I squeezed my eyes shut and imagining both of my mates holding me.

-I'm here. Even if it's faint due to connection issues. I'm still 100% with you. It will be ok. I hope I can get off work soon.

"Liliane, it doing a great job considering the circ.u.mstances," added Grant. I don't think that comment was meant for me. I nodded at Grant proud that I was able to keep my tears away. Loud footsteps tumbling down the stairs announced Thomas' arrival. I quickly pushed away from Grant and smoothed the wrinkled on my top and pants. Hugging Grant in this place felt immoral. Thomas peeked at us.

"She's awake, come," he waved. He went up to the stairs and I found myself mechanically following behind. The first time that sounded odd when I reached the landing was the constant beeping noise that came from the first floor. Thomas nodded at me at the top, urging me to keep moving. I gave a quick peek at Grant over my shoulder. I wanted to hold his hand. I needed to touch him to feel that sense of comfort.

"It's ok," he smiled. I was surprised that I found the strength to keep going. In no time, I stood in front of my parent's room. Well, at least that's where they use to sleep. Thomas twisted the knob but then paused and looked at us.

"Mm, I have to warn you, mom is pretty weak. So please be gentle, ok," he frowned. I couldn't decide if he was being polite or rude. Actually, I couldn't process the whole experience. It seemed like a dream, where what I was feeling and seeing didn't really reconcile.

Thomas pushed the door open. The sight of the room beyond smacked me across the face, I wasn't really prepared to take it all. In my parents' kind sized bed stood with a fully equipped hospital bed. There was a machine beeping on the left by the window. Everything else was gone. No more ugly closet that I thought contained monsters when I was small. No more dressing table where mom kept her collection of perfumes that I used to steal while she wasn't looking. It was an empty room with bare white wall with only a bed in the middle. My attention stopped at the skinny from under the white sheet then up to the frail face smiling at me. Mom.

"I'm so happy you came, Lili," she voice was broken. She sounded like a very old woman. A dying one. I instinctively took a step back. Bumping into Grant who stood behind me.

"I-I can't," I covered my mouth with a trembling hand. Grant took a step towards the bed. Thomas gave him room to get closer.

"Hello, Madame, I'm Grant happy to finally meet you," mom extended a shaky hand at him which he immediately took.

"Hello, young man. Call me Murielle. I-I'm…" she voice trailed off and the beeping increased. Alarmed Thomas rushed to her side.

"Mom! What's the matter?" he shouted. Then shot Grant a dark look. "What that hell were you doing?"

"Thomas," smiled mom as she turned to face him. "Please come down," she pleaded.

"I'm only trying to help her. It must be very painful and scary, isn't it Murielle?" said Grant in a soft voice.

"What a nice young man. Who are you?" her eyes darted from Grant to Thomas who got back on his feet with an annoyed face.

"He's Liliane husband," he muttered. They all turned their focus back at me. I stood frozen a couple of steps away from the bed. I couldn't bring myself to get any nearer. My eyes stayed on the stain brown carpet that had a funny smell.

"Liliane, I understand that you resent me or your father for what we did to you," said mom in her worn out voice. "But please before you condemn us… let me tell you the whole story," I instantly looked up meeting her teary eyes. My heart skipped a beat. Her grey eyes were soft and loving. Unbearably soft and loving.