104 What Is It About Other People That You Actually Hate?

Gadiel

May 14, 8:25 pm, Canberra, Australia

The sun had completely set, and Gadiel sat, hunched over Tarik's desk with the light on. Behind him on the bed, Medina snored gently.

The book he was reading was about the story of the Sun and the Moon, about the trials they faced together and how they overcame them. Gadiel figured that since they chosen to be the Vestiges of the Sun and Moon, maybe Ai was also some sort of Vestige, and he could find out more about her by reading this book.

Instead, he seemed to be learning more about Tarik.

For example, Tarik had a habit of underlining and circling certain sentences and passages in the books he read. At first, Gadiel found it incredibly annoying.

Then he started to notice which lines were being pointed out.

Mostly, they were lines that expressed what the Sun thought of the Moon, and how his opinion of the Moon had slowly changed over time.

"The Moon had a gentle fierceness, a strong, pillar of strength behind their kindly smile."

"Their radiance was quiet, but brilliant. It didn't draw attention to them, but instead made those around them shine all the brighter."

"They were quiet in their convictions, but incredibly stubborn. It took eons for the Sun to realize that despite the many ways they expressed themselves, the Moon rarely changed their core beliefs."

The last one was double underlined. Gadiel thought he could feel a sense of gleeful frustration when Tarik had underlined those words.

But in a way, Gadiel understood. Because everything he read about what the Moon thought of the Sun...

Well, he'd thought the same about Tarik.

"A blazing inferno of charm, somehow oblivious to his own brilliance."

"Despite his harsh words and bleak outlook, he was still immeasurably kind in his own, rough way."

"No matter what it was, he was able to see it. And if he was able to see it, he could learn to love it, even if it couldn't love itself.

Gadiel couldn't have written it better himself. It was really as if he had been the Moon in his past life, and Tarik had been the Sun. Honestly, it was a little creepy how accurately this book displayed his thoughts of Tarik.

So did that mean that this was how Tarik saw Gadiel?

As strong, reliable, and kind? Kind enough to bring others up without a care for himself?

Gadiel had to laugh.

Gadiel wasn't this version of the Moon. Sure, their outside actions might be similar. Gadiel might try to act kind and nice to other people, but the reason he did all that...

Well. Gadiel knew better than anyone how impure his intentions were.

"Mmmnnn..."

He turned back, to find Medina blinking, confused.

"You doing alright?" he said, getting up. "You need like, a water or something?"

"W-what happened?" she said, taking the cup of water gingerly.

"Do you remember anything?" Gadiel asked in reply.

Medina narrowed her eyes, taking a sip from the cup, before her eyes widened. She lowered the cup, looking down at her hands. They were shaking.

She looked up at Gadiel.

"No," she said quietly.

Gadiel didn't say anything. He simply looked down at her.

That only seemed to make her more agitated. She stood up, walking backwards towards the door, staring at Gadiel.

"No, no, I remember things!" she said. "I used to go hunting with my dad in Tasmania. I mean in, in..."

She struggled to come up with a name.

"My house, growing up, was blue!" she said. "It had these big, wide windows, where I could see the field stretch out for miles-"

"You said you grew up in Kaleen," Gadiel gently reminded her. "In the suburbs."

Medina blinked in surprise, realizing that was also true.

"I have a brother," she said, voice shaky. Her back reached the door, surprising her. She looked over to the sink.

"A younger brother, he was born when I was seven. I hated him growing up but now we have a good relationship..."

Her voice trailed off as she looked at the sink, unable to meet Gadiel's eyes. He walked over to her, and gently took the cup from her hands.

"What's his name?" he asked.

He watched as her jaw trembled. Her eyes glistened with tears as she sniffed, bringing her hand up to her eyes.

"C'mere," said Gadiel, opening his arms.

Medina looked up, blinking in surprise. Tears dropped down her face.

Gadiel didn't wait. He pulled her into a hug.

For a moment, Medina went limp with surprise. Slowly, she brought her arms up around him...

...and sobbed.

She held him tight, crying into his shoulder for what felt like a good half an hour. In reality, it was only about ten minutes. The entire time, Gadiel held her tight, making sure she was okay.

Once she was done, she gently pushed him away.

"You okay?" he asked. "For now, I mean."

Medina chuckled, wiping her eyes away.

"For now," she affirmed. "But I...I don't know what to think anymore."

"Whatever you want," said Gadiel, placing Medina's cup in the sink. "You're still you."

"But...I'm just a...just a..."

"So what?" said Gadiel. "So what if you were made to be a puppet? That doesn't mean that the things you felt, the things you wanted are any less real."

"Everything I know is a lie," she said, turning away from Gadiel. "I'm not a real person."

She looked at her reflection in the mirror.

"The only reason I'm here...is to help kill you."

"Well, you're doing a terrible job," said Gadiel. "If that was the case, why didn't you let me die in back in the labyrinth?"

Medina simply stared at Gadiel.

"Because I wanted to," said Medina. "But that was all a plan for you to trust me. So that Ai could come in and-"

"Ai came in and took Tarik because we fought," said Gadiel. "It had nothing to do with you."

"You didn't fight because of me? Or because of the labyrinth?"

"What does the labyrinth have to do with-"

"Because I made you go there!" said Medina, now facing Gadiel. "I made you and Tarik go into that stupid labyrinth just so I could get you to trust me, and, and-"

"And what?" said Gadiel, folding his arms. "What exactly did you do?"

"You don't get it," she hissed. "She's used me to spy on you. Like I'm some kind of...spy camera."

"She would have done that anyway," said Gadiel, shrugging. "If not through you, then in some other way."

"If anything, you made my relationship with Tarik stronger," Gadiel continued. "You didn't do anything wrong. The reason why Ai was able to take Tarik was because I was stupid, I..."

Gadiel sighed and hung his head. He felt a weird, nauseous feeling in his stomach. He didn't want to admit this, he just wanted to make Medina feel better.

"...I was the reason why Tarik pushed me away," he said quietly. "It's not your fault. It's mine."

For a moment, neither of them said anything. Medina looked at Gadiel like he was crazy.

"I thought you hated me," she blurted out. "Why are you being so nice to me?"

Gadiel didn't say anything for a little bit. He looked away, a little embarrassed.

"It's not that I hate you or anything," he muttered. "You're just..."

He bit his lip.

"I wish...I was more like you," he finally admitted.

Medina simply stared at Gadiel. Then, she walked over to the bed, and sat down. Hard. She rubbed her temples.

After a while, she looked up at a sheepish looking Gadiel. She opened her mouth to speak.

"Huh???" she said eloquently.

Gadiel sighed. He reeeeaaaallly didn't want to admit this. But since he was on a roll...

"You...are really good...at expressing how you feel," said Gadiel, looking away from her. "Like, to the point where it's embarrassing. And cringey. Like oh my god is it cringey. I don't need to know about who you think tops-"

"Gee, I see why you want to be like me so much now," said Medina dryly.

"The point is," Gadiel started, then stopped. He sighed once more, then sat down next to Medina.

"I can't...do what you do," he said. "You can talk about the things you like, the things you hate, the things that annoy and anger you so easily. The only time I've ever been able to express any of my emotions are when people have forced it out of me. And even then, the only person who ever succeeded was Tarik."

"But you...make it seem so easy," Gadiel sighed. "It's...really annoying."

Medina snorted.

"Gee, thanks," she said. "I feel much better now."

Gadiel smiled, and lay back on the bed.

"It's not your fault," he repeated. "It's not your fault that Tarik got captured."

A beat passed.

"You weren't saying that back at Baldessin," she said.

"I didn't know what was going on back then," Gadiel replied. "And...I didn't...want to admit...that I was wrong."

A beat passed.

"I'm really sorry," he added.

Medina didn't say anything for a while.

"You know Tarik loves you, right?" she said suddenly.

Gadiel raised an eyebrow, but it was all he could do to stop himself from getting up and shaking Medina into telling him everything.

"He's just...got his own baggage to deal with too," she finished, rubbing her eyes.

Gadiel said nothing for a while, simply staring at the ceiling.

"I am really trying not to get up and scream at you to tell me what he said to you," he said calmly.

Medina laughed at that, and turned to face him. Her eyes were very red and puffy; she had been crying even more it seemed.

"Maybe you should ask him instead of me," she said. "And maybe you should take some of your own advice."

"About what?" asked Gadiel, frowning.

Medina simply rolled her eyes.

"Men," she muttered. "Completely oblivious. That goes for the both of you."

She directed that last part at Gadiel.

"Just because you're both gay, doesn't stop you both from being men, it looks like."

"Okay, first off, Tarik is bi," said Gadiel dryly. "Second off, that's kind of the whole point of the gay thing."

They bickered a little, before finally settling down for a bit. Medina sat down in the study chair, and Gadiel way laying back on Tarik's bed.

"What do we do now?" Gadiel wondered aloud. "I don't know how to find Tarik."

"Don't you two have like...a connection or something?" Medina asked, looking at the books on Tarik's table.

Gadiel shook his head.

"I tried that but...I think Ai did something to it," he said. "I can feel that Tarik is alive...but apart from that..."

He trailed off, dejected. Not even his reading had helped him find anything useful. He felt like he was sinking in doubts.

Maybe that's why he had spent so much time cheering up Medina. At least he could do something about that, because she was here. But now...

How was he supposed to save Tarik, if he didn't even know where he was?

"Do you think..." Medina started, then stopped. She closed her eyes.

Gadiel looked up at her.

"What?" he asked.

Medina didn't answer. She simply sat there, eyes closed.

Then, blood started tricking out of her nose.

Immediately, Gadiel leaped up.

"Medina, you're bleeding," he said, coming up close to her. Medina didn't say anything. If anything, the bleeding only grew worse, flowing faster.

Gadiel looked around for something, anything. He grabbed a towel that was hanging off Tarik's door, wet it in the sink, and started dabbing it on Medina's face. Occasionally, he would say her name, slowly getting louder.

Just as he was about to consider calling triple zero, Medina gasped. Her eyes flew open, bloodshot. She looked up at Gadiel, and for a moment, he froze in terror.

Her irises had gone...funny. They were no longer circular; they were weirdly stretched and deformed.

"Tarik is in the new science facility," she muttered, a thin stream of blood coming out of the corner of her mouth. "He's...on the top floor..."

"I'm calling triple zero," said Gadiel, taking out his phone. "You need a-"

"No, go," said Medina, coughing up more blood. "He's...in trouble..."

"You're in trouble-"

"I'll call," said Medina, snatching his phone out of his hands. "You...save the Sun..."

She looked up at him, fire burning in her eyes. After a moment's hesitation, Gadiel nodded.

The truth was, as soon as he heard where Tarik was held, he had wanted to go there. He had wanted to leave Medina like this and just go straight to save Tarik.

And he did.

He turned to leave Medina to call the ambulance, and made his way to the building as fast as he could.

God, he was a terrible person.