Chapter 31 - #31

Chapter 31: Liv's Decision

"What's bothering you?" Mr. Parker asked me.

We're here in New Jersey, visiting the site as usual. Everything here has been going great ever since they started building last month. They said the building might take a year or two to be fully furnished so we have to be patient about it. Based on the output that I saw, it looks bigger than the current one where we're staying. But Mr. Parker told us that we'll still be staying in the main hotel even this one is finished so there won't be any problems with how far the employees should drive to go to work.

"Nothing, Sir," I simply said even I know I lied. We're standing at his favorite spot here on the site.

"Come on, tell me. I know you're an independent person but I think you need some help on dealing with your problems somehow," he said while looking at the view. I'm starting to hate myself for acting like this around him. It makes me look pitiful and problematic.

"Did the decision I made was wrong?" I asked right away.

"What decision?" he asked back.

"That I wanted her behind bars to pay for what she did to me," I told him, curious of what he'll say about it.

"There's nothing wrong about the decision you made, Liv. But it seems like you're doubting it. Why is that?" He's right. I don't think I'm stable of what I want to settle.

"Her mom said sorry. Am I that desperate to put her in jail?" Something tells me that I should forgive her but my mind keeps thinking that I need to protect myself and my loved ones.

"What I'm about to say is just my own opinion and I completely believe that it isn't important. Right now, you'll have to make your own decision. It's your choice, Liv. It'll always be yours," he told me.

...

I woke up so early and I feel exhausted. Not because of my work but because I was thinking the whole night if I'm making the right decision. I don't want to disappoint anyone on this point, especially myself. I can't live thinking I've made the wrong choice.

Today is the day where I decide if I should make her pay or give her another chance. It's not easy to be in this position but it's my responsibility.

What made my mind go crazy today is that I dreamt about mom. My dream was more like a nightmare because the situation was reversed. My mom came to talk to Emily to set me free and she did. She had forgiven me for my dream. So, I was thinking, what if I did the same thing and my mom will go beg the person I made a mistake on? I think mom is trying to give me a clue on what should I do today.

I dried my hair as soon as I finished taking a bath. I wore a blue blouse, denim jeans and a pair of black flat shoes. I tied my hair into a ponytail and applied some powder before putting some lip balm on my lips so I wouldn't look like a sick person when I get there.

Summer left early for school so I was alone here, waiting for Rowan. Mr. Parker insisted that I should take the ride so I'll be comfortable on my way to the police station.

Minutes have passed and Rowan's already here. He offered to open the door so I went inside and said thank you. While he was driving, he talk to me about some things that I might experience when I get there because his wife also made a serious decision years ago on putting someone in jail. He said I should be calm because the consequences won't be easy if I'll let my anger decide what will I do.

...

"Whatever happens, it's all up to you. Do what you think you should do, okay?"

I nodded to Mr. Parker as I walk around the police station. After a few steps, they told me to sit on the other chair and then I saw her, Emily was right in front of me with handcuffs on both of her hands. A word did not come out of her mouth when she saw me but I know she disliked my presence.

"Good day to the both of you. We're here to settle what needs to be settled. Let's start with you, Ms. Gomez. Is there anything you want to say to Ms. Smith?" the policeman asked me. Her mom was right behind her. I could read her mind and she was like begging me to not continue what she thinks I'll do.

I took a deep breath before facing her. "You know what? What you did to me caused so much pain and trauma, and I exactly can't accept your reason why you did that to me. I believe I don't deserve to be stabbed just like that just because I didn't let you continue on your plan. I was helping you to go on the right path but you kept on pushing yourself to go on your own way. I deserved an explanation," I calmly said, still facing her.

She didn't look at me once. I think she's avoiding having eye contact with me which I think will make things harder. "I have nothing to say to you. You won't let me free anyways. So, what's the point?"

I glanced at her mom and she looked disappointed at what Emily answered to me. She thought she was adding fuel to the fire.

"You're assuming a little too much. What if my mind changes?" I asked.

"Wow," she shrugged, letting out a sarcastic laugh. "Don't give me that bullshit, Olivia. I don't give a damn to those people who want me to have hope for myself. I'm sick of it."

I was surprised that I didn't get mad at what she said. I think what she's saying comes from a deep reason and I'll never know it. Her mother looked at me like she already accepted that I'll not change my mind after how she acted and talked in front of me.

"So, you hate those people who love and care for you?" I curiously asked her.

"No one does," she answered instantly.

"What about your mom? If you think you don't have friends, you should at least think about your mother who does everything just to make sure you won't get in prison."

She was quiet for a while and didn't even look at her mom, not even a single glance. Why is she acting like this around her?

"Just make your decision. We're just wasting time," she calmly said. Her mood changed a bit and it makes me curious. Was it because I mentioned her mother? Is that her weakness?

"Before I do that, I want you to answer my question and we're done, I promise." She didn't respond and looked away and I took that as a yes. "Do you think you might do this again to someone you hate?"

"I have no idea," she answered seriously.

I slowly nodded before doing the thing I might regret.

"Set her free."

The three of them looked at me like they did not expect me to make such a ludicrous decision. Me either, I can't believe myself but I also don't think I made everything worse. I stood up and was about to walk away when I heard her voice.

"What?" Emily unbelievably said, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Ma'am, wait," the policeman called me.

"Are you hearing yourself?" Emily asked me so I turned around.

"I can ask the same thing to myself, Emily, but I think it's the right thing to do for now. I also want you to know that you can't stop people from having hopes for you as I do. You said yourself that you have no idea if you'll ever commit the same mistake again. Instead of thinking you'll do it again, I'll surrender my faith in you. It's your choice to prove me wrong," I said before looking at her mom who looks very speechless. I'll assume that's a thank you.

I paced as I think of how stupid it is to have the idea of setting free of someone who almost made me go into the light. But I believe that if I did the opposite thing, it won't make me sleep for days, weeks, months, or even years. I just really hope I did the right thing.

"Liv." I heard Mr. Parker's voice so I looked at him. He was standing with Rowan beside the other policemen. "How did it go?"

"Pretty well," I told him. "I guess we can go to the hotel now."

…

"You're making me feel worried, Liv. You haven't said a single word since we got here."

I was standing in front of Mr. Parker, not knowing how I'll tell him what I did.

"You set her free, didn't you?" He said, getting a hint from my behavior.

"I did," I answered without hesitation. He didn't seem to be upset when he heard what I said. I think he was expecting that to happen.

"See? If you thought that wanting her to be in prison made you a bad person, think again."

…