Chapter 239 - 238

"Did you try to help him?" Kai asked his older brother, his judgemental look landing on his cold face. Xan scoffed, walking deeper into the room. No one was there except Philip and them two. His eyes grazed the werewolf and the crown prince remained silent, falling on Kai's bed and laying down, looking at the top of the ceiling. 

"I envy you, you know." Xan said, a jealous smile on his face and Kai frowned, confused. 

"Me?"

"Yes, you. You never had her eyes following you. You never had to obey every single one of her words, you never really had to think before you did anything. Because you were not meant to take the throne. You liked to view yourself as a rebel, someone who went against the rules but the truth was Kai, that for you, there were no rules. That's what it annoyed me the most, you grew up able to do all the things you want. All you really had to do was not to embarrass the family. Because every time the young and cute prince did something the pressure on his older brother's shoulders kept getting bigger and bigger. Don't be like Kai, don't embarrass us, we need you to be a good example, you will be king one day. While you lived your life your every mistake was directed towards me and now…now I've become like this, unable to help my lover because every move I make makes me feel like I will throw up." Xan said.

Kai was standing at the other side of the room, looking at him with surprise in his eyes, he never thought he would hear something like this. The crown prince spoke as if he was sharing some kind of silly rumor he had heard, no emotion in his voice, his eyes closed as he tried to hide the torture of his early years. 

"Xan…I…"

"So don't ask me about what I could and couldn't do. I tried to help him, for him I fell on my knees, I angered my mother and even pleaded for her help. I would do anything for Lun but all everyone does is criticize me, even him." he continued, getting up and leaving the comfort of the warm bed. "You two were dating before you were caught by the BloodyPeople. I know everything Kai, I've said that many times before but even though I kept your secret somehow I was the bad guy. After this I really don't want anything to do with you people. I am sick of hearing how unfortunate your lives were, I am sick about how someone has to be the bad guy in your story even though you never get to see behind anyone else's struggles other than your own. You were so mad at our mother for what she did to you, rightfully so but the moment dad appeared, the man who was never in our lives you quickly took sides. So mother was bad but he, who practically did not exist, is good? At least she was here to watch over us." 

"No one is good Xan." Kai told him and his older brother scoffed. "Not you, not me, not our parents because as you said we are only able to see our struggles. It's a pity and I know I am flawed but don't you dare take yourself out of the equation. Everything, everything that happened to me could have been avoided. This thing, what happened to Lun, the man you said you would do anything for could have been avoided but no, you were too late. Your fear keeps you back and that, well even if Lun lives, should haunt you, the same way my mistakes haunt me." 

The two brothers looked at each other, their blue eyes intense. They didn't hate each other, they were simply jealous of one another. Xan was jealous because Kai was free and Kai was jealous because the crown prince had most of the things he wanted, his mother's love, a normal fate and life. Would they swap places if they could? No, but everyone wants what they don't have, all creatures with intelligence are greedy, all men are greedy, wanting more and more, everything until the well of ambitions has dried out. The two brothers didn't hate each other, they hated being reminded though of the things they didn't have and never would. 

"I don't think this is the right time for you to argue." Philip stepped in, taking Kai's hand in his and pulling him gently back. Philip could sense the tension between them, he could feel the storm coming and he wanted to avoid a fight right now. Lun's disappearance had been known, people were rushing everywhere and Soran with Ash were already gathering the maids, if they fought now their plan would get pushed back. "We have a plan, Xan you too, aren't you doing this for Lun? Then maybe both of you should calm down. You won't get to solve your differences like this." he advised them and the crown prince clicked his tongue, getting once more on the bed, his arms behind his head as he looked at the couple.

"Don't you just hate it when a werewolf is right?" he said, shaking his head and Kai scoffed, ignoring him and turning towards Philip. He squeezed his hand and started walking, leading him a bit further into his spacious room, away from his brother's eyes. 

Kai hugged him, feeling the slow and rhythmic beat of his heart while his raced with anxiety. He closed his eyes, resting his head on his shoulder, feeling Philip caress his silk hair.

"It's going to be okay." The werewolf whispered in his ear.

He had always been like this, Philip. Level headed, reasonable and calm. When he had met him in this lifetime Kai had thought he changed but maybe now, after getting his memories back he was always finding his true self. His patience, the calmness in his stare. The werewolf was everything Kai wasn't and that completed him. 

"Thank you." Kai whispered, breathing in his scent. 

"After this though, we will be getting some time alone." Philip told him with a sexy smirk on his face as he raised his face, kissing him. "And that's not negotiable." he added, making Kai chuckle when a knock was heard . Both of them looked at the door as it slowly opened revealing a panting Ash, searching for Kai with his eyes.

"What is it?" he asked him. 

"They have all gathered. Soran is waiting." he announced and Kai stared at his brother. Xan was already standing, ready to leave. 

"Let's go then." Kai said, a smirk on his face as he gave Philip one more kiss. 

"Be careful.." Philip warned him and the young prince nodded.