Chapter 88 - Seri Gets A Taste Of Liquid Gold

I woke up in the morning after my exciting day at the circus. Unfortunately, I didn't have the day off and still needed to go train with Dante.

I had stayed up all night playing with the kittens and my new monkey. The kittens, which were not really kittens anymore, did not know what to do with the monkey. To them, it was an extraterrestrial being.

I rubbed my eyes as I lethargically walked down to the dining room where my mother and father were already waiting. The servant's served me food and I munched on it sleepily.

My mother stared at me with a sharp gaze as she tapped her fingers on the table. Her stomach was now starting to show her pregnancy.

Ugh. She definitely has something to say. Maybe she won't say anything though.

"So."

F*ck. She's saying something.

"I heard that there was an incident at the circus where animals got loose."

I choked on my food, "R-really?"

"And then coincidentally you also brought home a monkey."

What?! How'd she know!!? I was purposely hiding PoonPoon!!

I glanced at Lona who looked away guiltily.

Traitor!!!

"So I'm curious as to how you got that Monkey."

I gave a convincing smile, "I won him in a game."

She frowned, "I'm sure. You know you can't keep it, right?"

I pouted, "What?! But he's so cute! Show her PoonPoon."

PoonPoon jumped out of my hair and Lona instantly smacked her forehead in disappointment. My mother's face paled, "Why was it.. In your hair..."

I shrugged, "He feels safe there."

PoonPoon shrieked in approval. My mother just stared at it dumbfounded.

My father gave a large smile, "Aww! It's so tiny! PoonPoon... Hmm.. That sure is an... Interesting name..."

I smiled largely, "Isn't it? He likes it very much. See? He's crying tears of happiness!"

My father scratched his chin, "But how did you come up with PoonPoon?"

"I was thinking of a spoon at the time." I answered simply.

"I see..."

Everyone stared at me as if they had more questions because of my response. Such as, why were you thinking about a spoon?

But then they remembered that it would be better if they didn't know. Most likely, Seri's answer would be something that you definitely did not want to know.

My mother finally spoke, "Well you can't keep it. I won't let you." Her face changed as if she suddenly recalled something important. She looked to my father, "What do you think, dear?"

He thought for a moment before shrugging, "I think she should keep it."

I clapped my hands, "Yaay!! Thank you Daddy!"

My mother frowned, "Why?"

He smiled at her, "Because she's so happy. Would you rather her go back to moping?"

My mother looked down with a defeated expression, "No..." She sighed, "Fine. You can keep it. But you're not allowed to have it in your hair. That's just.... Well I don't really know what that is. But it seems improper and unhygienic."

I nodded, "Alright. Fine. PoonPoon, stay on my shoulder from now on."

It gave a small squeak and crawled down. My father chuckled, "Look at that! It actually listened to her."

I chuckled arrogantly, "Of course! He's smart after all. That's why I'm training him."

My mother gave me another suspicious look, "On another note, I heard that a lion broke out. Did anything else happen?"

I looked at Lona with a look of betrayal. She gave her head a slight shake. I understood that she meant she didn't tell my mother about the lion incident.

Well at least she kept quiet about that. The last thing I want is to be tied to some murders from a lion attack.

My father nodded vigorously, "That's right! Were you hurt?!"

I smiled at him, "No, Daddy. Luckily the show was boring so we left before they got loose."

My mother scowled, "What a coincidence."

I cleared my throat awkwardly, "Well... I'm done eating. I better leave for William's now. Come on Lona."

I quickly rushed out of the room to avoid my mother's judgmental glare. Once we arrived to their house, I saw the annoying Joel waiting. During the morning on the weekends, he teaches me etiquette.

He ran over to me with a irksome smile. "Seeerrrriii~ Are you ready for your lessons?"

I pushed Lona to him, "Take one for the team Lona."

She looked at me with an eyebrow raised, "What?"

Joel stopped and smiled charmingly at Lona, "Oho~ It's the lovely maiden Lona. How are you today?"

He bent down and kissed her hand. She stared at him with a serious expression, but in her heart she was blushing.

I quickly left behind Lona to flirt with Joel. I went over to the training grounds. Those idiots were always either training or studying from sun up to sun down. If they had a choice, they'd probably skip meals.

Seriously. I need to help them find a more acceptable hobby.

"Oi bozos." I waved to the two of them. William looked up from his book and Dante stopped swinging his sword.

William frowned, "What did you just call us?!"

I chuckled, "Nothing."

Dante looked at me, "No lesson today?"

"Actually, I threw Lona to the wolves. Joel's currently flirting with her, so I'm sure he will forget about the lesson today." I scratched my cheek feeling a bit guilty.

William rolled his eyes, "My half brother is such a disgrace."

I sat down next to him and yawned, "I think I will take a nap."

William glanced at me trying not to seem so worried, "Did you not get sleep last night? I thought you were feeling better, but you're still not sleeping?"

I looked at him a bit surprised. I didn't think he knew that I had been getting worse sleep than usual lately. Although, it was a bit obvious. I always have bags under my eyes because I stay up late reading, but lately they've gotten even darker and more apparent.

This was because I kept having nightmares from the memory of my brother. I then felt extra exhausted and mopey at school and at training.

So I shouldn't be surprised that he noticed. Yet, I can't help but feel slightly embarrassed that he did.

I looked away blushing, "Oh.. Well, no. I am in a much better mood. The circus last night was really fun."

He smiled softly at me, "That's good."

I coughed in embarrassment, "Anyway, I didn't sleep last night because I was busy training PoonPoon."

"Training?"

I nodded, "Yup! I'm training him like a Pokeymon."

William furrowed his brow, "Pokeymon?"

I shook my head, "Nevermind. That's before your time. Just watch this."

I took PoonPoon off of my shoulder and put him on the ground.

"PoonPoon! Use rock throw on Dante!"

The monkey looked at the ground, searching for something before picking up a rock. It gave a high pitched squeal and chucked the rock. It hit Dante in the middle of his forehead.

He frowned, "Ow."

William blinked completely dumbfounded.

"Fufu! Good PoonPoon! I also taught him bite and scratch attack."

I opened my mouth to command PoonPoon, but William cut in, "You don't have to show me!! That's enough."

I frowned, "But I haven't even showed you the best one!!! PoonPoon, use fecal attack!!!"

"USE WHAT?!" William shouted in horror.

The monkey made a strained facial expression before shaking it's head. I frowned and picked him back up.

I sighed, "Looks like he still needs training. He just can't seem to poop on cue."

"YOU CAN'T TEACH HIM THAT!!"

"And why not?"

William looked at me in disgust, "Because it's disgusting! And TOTALLY improper!!"

I sighed, "Fine fine. I won't teach him fecal attack."

I looked at PoonPoon and winked.

Oh I'm definitely still teaching him that.

William frowned, "Did you just wink at the monkey?"

I looked away, "Whaaat? No... Why would I do that?"

He clicked his tongue, "I can't believe how irresponsible you are. One day you're going to regret acting like that."

"Yes grandmother."

A vein in his forehead throbbed but he decided not to acknowledge my words. "By the way, they still haven't captured that lion."

I chuckled, "Still? It can't be that hard."

"Several knights had it cornered, but when it tried to attack them, they ran away."

Man.. I wish I could have seen that.

"Why do you look so happy? It could end up hurting someone."

I shrugged, "Then why don't they kill it if they're so worried?"

He crossed his arms impatiently, "Because it's a lion."

"And?"

"A lion is the symbol of the Royal family. If someone kills a lion, then it's seen as treason against the Royal family."

But... Whipping the lion isn't?

I shook my head, "The customs here make no sense." I yawned, "Well I'm going to take a nap now."

As I went to lay down I heard a fluffy voice, "Serriii~"

"God d*mmit."

I looked over to see Joel jogging toward me happily while being followed by a tired looking Lona.

He smiled at me, "Queen Luna wanted to have tea with you. She's curious about your progress."

I groaned, "What progress?!"

He giggled, "I said the same thing. But she still insisted."

I stood up, "Fine. Let's go."

Queen Luna was still my meal ticket after all. I can't afford to make her upset.

PoonPoon quickly ran up my dress as I walked and got comfortable on my shoulder. We walked over to Luna who was waiting for us.

I curtsied to her, "Greetings to her highness."

Queen Luna giggled, "You look so cute when you try to be formal."

I forced myself to smile at her.

This b*tch didn't want to test me! She just wanted to have tea with me!!! The test was just an excuse!

I glanced at the advisor beside her and he had a similar face. Sure enough, he had the same thoughts I did.

I sat down across from her and yawned. She frowned slightly, "Why do you look like you didn't get sleep last night? Prince William said that you were feeling better..."

I shook my head, "I am feeling better. I was just too excited to sleep knowing I would see you today."

She chuckled, "My.. What a charmer. Are you sure there isn't anything you want?"

I chuckled, "Well I wouldn't mind a cup of coffee."

She thought for a moment before nodding, "I suppose one cup couldn't hurt."

My eyes lit up. I was so excited that I didn't even try to keep up my fake persona, "Wait. WHAT?! Really!?"

She laughed haughtily and nodded. She winked, "Just don't tell your father. He can be such a stickler for these kinds of things."

I nodded happily, "Cross my heart!"

The servant poured a cup of coffee and handed it to me. I took it from him and held it up in the air. My eyes sparkled at its magnificent sight.

I can almost hear angels singing.

Is this the holy grail?

It must be! For I've been blessed by the heavens~

Queen Luna smiled happily at my reaction, "Oh my. If I knew you would have been this happy, I would have let you have some earlier."

"Thanks Queen Luna! This is the best gift I've ever received!"

She chuckled, "The best? Oh my. What an honor. But you've never had it before so how will you know if you'll like it?"

Oh, trust me. I know.

"You usually like sweet things. And this is a bit bitter. But if you add milk and sugar-"

"No." I said firmly, "Do you know why coffee is called liquid gold?"

"I don't."

"It's because coffee is the currency of the world. It's more valuable than any form of money."

Also, students literally run on coffee. Without it, I probably would have never made it through college.

I continued, "So one should always treat it with respect. Adding milk and sugar would be a travesty to the bean. You must keep it wholesome to appease the bean. Then, and only then, will you get to experience the beans full potential."

Queen Luna didn't know whether to be shocked or to laugh. "Oh my... You really take coffee seriously."

I shrugged, "Oh, I'm not that serious about it."

She chuckled, "I don't believe you. Well go on, try it."

I closed my eyes and brought it to my lips gracefully. The hot liquid rushed into my mouth, saturating my taste buds. My body shivered in pleasure from the taste.

I felt my soul lifting into the air. I can literally touch heaven!!!

F*ck! I can see the face of God!!!

Who needs that pitiful mortal realm when you can have a taste of heaven~

"Well?"

Queen Luna's question brought me out of my transcendence.

"It's amazing!!! No! It's heavenly!!"

She chuckled, "I'm glad."

I finished the drink too quickly and looked at the cup in disappointment. However, I may have overestimated the small body of Seri.

Suddenly the Earth around me began to shake. I felt as though the atoms in my body were colliding and splitting apart. Everything moved in slow motion and I watched particles lightly float through the air.

Queen Luna looked at me with a troubled expression, "Are you... Alright?"

I nodded quickly, "OhmygodI'veneverbeenbetter! Theworld'ssuchabeautifulplace! OHMYGOD! IWANTTOGOFORARUN!"

I jumped up and ran away at top speed. Queen Luna followed me out of curiosity. I ran over to William and started smacking his face.

"OiOiOiOiOi!"

He swatted me, "What's your problem?! Get off of me!!"

I jumped in circles around him, "OiOiOiOiOi! Let'sgoforarun! IbetIcouldbeatyou! Ifeelsofastandpowerfulrightnow! Let'sgoLet'sgoLet'sgoLet'sgo!!!"

I ran around him in circles.

William looked to his mother in a panic, "What's wrong with her??"

She smiled with a guilty but pleased expression, "She wanted coffee so bad, so I gave her a cup."

"Mother!!! She's already hyper!! Why did you make her more hyper?!"

She shrugged apathetically, "Because I thought it would be cute."

I stopped running and flipped around, "DANTE CATCH!"

He didn't have time to react before I ran and jumped, throwing myself at him. My body collided with his, knocking him over completely. I grabbed his shoulders and shook him wildly.

"LET'S FIGHT! I WANNA FIGHT! LET'SGOLET'SGOLET'SGOLET'SGO!"

Dante's eyes swirled from dizziness and he passed out. I jumped off of him and began to run around crazily.

William rushed to Dante's side, "MOTHER! SHE KILLED DANTE!"

Queen Luna waved him off, "Oh, I'm sure he's fine."

They watched as the crazed Seri ran around hectically, torturing anyone whose path crossed hers. She began to laugh like a madman and started fighting with a tree.

A butterfly flew across her path and she began to chase after it. As she ran, she suddenly collapsed onto the ground.

"Oh. Looks like she crashed."