Chapter 73 - 41st Night

Before leaving the bathroom, Feng Xuan washed her hands on the bowl shaped like a shell. Then as always, her little pep talk. She did not use much words this time. Only: "You can do this."

The bedroom had glass windows that were pushed to the side. There was an airconditioner but it was off and so were the fans. The smell of incense filled her nose. The sound of the waves crashing on the shore was loud in her ears—or maybe it was because it was eerily silent in the room. Most of the lanterns had been turned down but enough were left so she could find her way to the bed where Qing Chen was waiting for her.

"Did you take a shower?" she asked as she got up the bed.

"Yeah, there was another bathroom near the living room."

"Oh, I did not see it." She almost bit her tongue. What was she talking about? Was she going back to babbling? No. She could not. She got up on this bed with a purpose. And she was going to fulfill it.

But what if it would fail? There was no scientific proof that training a person to expect something for forty days would suddenly result to that person wanting to know why you suddenly stopped. It happened to one girl! What if it would not work on her?

Feng Xuan willed her heart to harden. She needed to keep these doubts at bay.

"Do you feel sleepy?" she asked, slipping under the blanket. As the night got deeper, the wind had gotten colder. Clad in her silk nighties, she was starting to think that she made the wrong decision by grabbing these instead of a pair of pajamas Qing Chen was wearing.

"A bit," he answered. She was very well aware of his gaze carefully following her.

"What are we up to tomorrow?"

"We are only here until breakfast. There would be no flights on nights. We'd arrive at Chengshi around 12 to 1 A.M."

She pouted. "Aw."

She could barely see Qing Chen's eyes in the dark. He was mostly a silhouette, turned away from their source of light outside the window. When he spoke, his voice was full of curiosity. "Are you sad?"

"What do you mean am I sad?!" Was it not obvious enough? "Are you not sad?"

"I am. But only a little. We would be home soon."

"Yeah," she grumbled quietly, looking down. "But that also meant that we have to go back to our busy schedules." Feng Xuan shook her head just as the thoughts about the hotel and opening her shop and her school entered her mind. She immediately closed that door before it consumed her. "Never mind, let's talk about something else."

Qing Chen slid his fingers on her arm, leaving a trail of goosebumps. "Don't worry. I got a text from Qing Lok earlier. Everything all is well in Chengshi. We managed to escape this weekend. We will do it again soon."

"I will hold you to that," Feng Xuan immediately said. "I will always keep a packed bag."

"Please do," Qing Chen chuckled and withdrew his hand.

No! Feng Xuan almost protested, but that would have been too obvious.

"What do you think about the place?"

"Oh, it's beautiful!" she remembered the scene she had come home to—like it was something straight out of a book, or even just a movie. Words tumbled excitedly out of her mouth, as if they could not go out faster. "The fruits are fresh. The air is clean! The food is delicious! And a house by the beach? This feels like a dream. Do you think you can get me a set of those herbs and spices they used in the meat? And that flower? The Goddess' Heart, right? Would it be possible for us to get some of them?"

Qing Chen laughed. "Where would you put them? In the pool?"

She gave it a thought. "I will have a hole dug up near our driveway and get a huge fountain to be placed there. I think it would be nice."

"Well, let's get to that first before we get the flowers."

"And the spices?"

"Yes. I will take care of that," he answered.

Then silence. Feng Xuan did not even think it lasted that long. But it felt like it had stretched on forever. It had been exactly three seconds when she spoke again. "Well, should we sleep?"

Qing Chen's voice was backed by a whine. "Already?"

Feng Xuan quickly bit on her lip. "Do you think this pretty face exists because I stay up late? I need my beauty sleep."

She saw Qing Chen's pearly white teeth as he cracked a smile. "Alright, then. Good night."

This was it. Usually when they said good night, she would lean over him and press a kiss his cheek or the side of his head. But tonight, she would not. "Good night." And for an added emphasis, she turned away from him.

Feng Xuan's heart was raging in her chest, telling her to go in Qing Chen's arms because it would not be possible for her to sleep if she was too far away from him, and to kiss him good night because if she would not, she would be the one who would lose sleep over it.

She could hear her own voice whispering in her head, scoldingly or trying to probe her conscience. "Oh no! What are you going to do if he fell asleep or YOU fell asleep waiting for him to move? You would miss a day in this streak! Would it beat the purpose? What if you would get used to missing a day and before you know it, you are already skipping days and sooner than later, you are already in a failing marriage?"

BOOM. BOOM. CAR EXPLOSION. BUILDING EXPLOSION.

Game over.

She was already thinking of the worst case scenario, that it was not working. But then she felt the sheets pull and could hear Qing Chen tossing beside her. Her mouth fell open in a silent scream of shock.

Was it working?!

Her body's temperature rose up and her mind birthed a hundred Feng Xuan's asking her "what are we going to do?!" Her toes were nervously curling.

Feng Xuan released a sharp breath. Okay, she told her mind. Let's wait it out.

It took a couple of minutes to make sure that this sign of tossing was leading where it was supposed to. Finally, Qing Chen heavily sighed.

She felt his fingers gently closed on her arm as he softly called her. "Feng Xuan? Are you still awake?"

Feng Xuan made a noise as if she was being roused from her sleep. "Yeah? Is something wrong?"

"N-no?" Qing Chen said hesitantly. "I just feel like… are we forgetting something?"

He sounded nervous! Feng Xuan would have laughed on a normal situation. "Did we leave something outside?"

"I don't think so."

"Did you put the fire out?"

"Yeah."

"Maybe you're just imagining things," she said.

"Y-yeah, maybe." Qing Chen sounded disappointed. He knew what was missing on his night. He was missing his wife and her kisses and holding her until they fell asleep.

"Okay," Feng Xuan said. "We have an early day tomorrow. You should get some sleep."

"Yeah. Good night."

Feng Xuan pursed her lips. He said good night, again. "Good night."

She thought that Qing Chen would have already fallen asleep, but then it had not been a minute and he was twisting and turning again. Feng Xuan sat upright, catching Qing Chen off guard. He sat up too. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said hastily as she got down from the bed. "I just need to pee."

She pressed her body against the bathroom door. She almost cursed inside her head. "This is crazy! I am the one losing my entire mind. Not him!" She splashed cold water on her face. "Nope," she said throwing the towel on the rack. "I refuse to succ.u.mb to the ridiculousness of the forty-day crap. I am going to do what I want to do."

With newfound bravery, she pulled the door open and stepped out—almost bumping into Qing Chen whose fist was raised like he was going to knock on the door. She made a spluttering noise, her confidence dying down just as it immediately came to her. "D-do you need the restroom?"

Qing Chen was grinning down at her triumphantly—oh no, wait. This was more of a smirk, not a smile Feng Xuan was familiar with from Qing Chen. "For five minutes I had been wondering what I had done wrong."

Feng Xuan made a move to sweep past him but he pressed his hand to the wall, blocking her way. She tried to keep her voice steady. "What are you talking about?"

Qing Chen raised his head to the ceiling and rubbed on his chin with his other hand. "I had been thinking, 'what did I do that I do not have a good night kiss tonight?' and I came up with nothing. Then I kept thinking some more, and then there was the epiphany." His grin got wider and Feng Xuan was reminded of the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland. "I can't believe I fell for it! I should've known the moment you said that you were going to give me good night kisses—but then again, I never thought you had that side in you. How long has it been going on? It had been more than a month for sure."

Feng Xuan ducked under his arm. How could he possibly got all that? Did he hear her? "I don't know what you're talking about, Qing Chen."

Qing Chen swiftly stood in front of her, stopping her tracks. Getting this close, she could smell him, the soap and the smell of salt from the air. "You got me good there, Feng Xuan." He sounded impressed. He started walking and Feng Xuan walked backwards, refusing to back on down on this. "It drove me right out of my damn mind for a moment."

The back of Feng Xuan's knees hit the bed and she almost fell down. She swallowed. She should say something. Defend herself. When did the tables turn? God.

Qing Chen's smirk turned into a smile but his eyes held the same glint from when she had opened the door. He took hold of her hand and looked down as his thumb lightly brushed against her knuckles, sending odd delicious ripples through her whole body. "So am I right that this was some sort of experiment?"

Feng Xuan was cornered. As much as she wanted to lie she could not bring herself to do it. She cleared her throat. "Are you mad?"

"No," he answered, letting go of the word with a disappointed sigh. "You did not have to go through all of that trouble. But strangely, it worked."

Feng Xuan nodded. When she spoke her voice was shaking. "I guess."

Qing Chen started to laugh. The earnest sound of it made Feng Xuan calm down for a second. "I can't believe it," he said. "My wife trained me to expect kisses each night and then one night, she would just stop. Just one thing though," Qing Chen lifted her head and Feng Xuan was startled to find that his eyes were black, as if his pupils swallowed every color in his eyes and just filled it with… desire. He raised her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss on the back and on the palm, each making Feng Xuan's breath hitch.

His fingertips tilted her chin upwards and his other hand gently but firmly pulled her closer, wrapping her in his heat. He looked at her through his long lashes, his voice thick and low when he said, "If you wanted a kiss, all you had to do was ask."

She was just about to gasp. Qing Chen's mouth caught it, his lips urgent but soft on top of hers. She gripped his shirt in surprise as air left her lungs. When she didn't pull away, his lips started moving, she felt it like a wave crashing against her body and that only his lips could keep her from drowning. They were kissing. THEY WERE KISSING! Qing Chen's hand circled to the back of her neck, guiding her mouth to his.

Is this really happening? she thought, her knees growing weak.

His lips tasted of fresh mint and were tentative and calculating. She must have let out a sound because his arms went around her and she gasped as he pulled her hard against him, pressing their chests together. Her head swam and her fingers clutched on his elbow, her nails digging on his skin.

And then he was pulling away. Suddenly, her body felt like it was not hers. Her hand that was lying limply on her side sprang to action, clutching on the neck of his shirt as she murmured against his lips, "Don't stop."

A low groan rumbled from his throat and then he was lifting her off the floor. He crawled on top of the bed before gently laying her down on the sheets, not even breaking the kiss for a second. "Feng Xuan," he whispered on her lips.

She almost whimpered. Her hands found his back and through the thin material of his shirt, she could feel his body burning up. Her fingers traced his shoulder blades, coaxing him to say her name again. She wanted to hear it a hundred more times before the night was over. His hands returned her gentle touches, caressing her sides and her face, his thumb lightly crossing her cheekbone.

Qing Chen broke away and Feng Xuan almost protested. "You need to breathe," he said, kissing the side of her face, up to her ear—stealing another breath from her.

She noticed that she was gasping for air, her lungs begging. "You're not really helping," she said. She did not even have to put her hand to her chest to know that her heart was raging in there. She could hear its thrashing just fine. "What was that?"

Qing Chen let out a soft laugh as his fingers lightly pulled at the hem of her top, grazing her stomach which shivered under his touch. He raised himself up and Feng Xuan got a look at him, her eyes squinting against the moonlight.

Her head was on the pool it made on the bed. Her hair looked like spilled ink on a canvas. Her eyes were wide with passion and her lips red. He was convinced she deserved to be painted and framed for all generations to see.

"You look beautiful," he said.

Feng Xuan let out a shaky breath. Qing Chen's eyes still looked dark that told her that they were far from being done but his lips carried an easy smile. "You don't have to gas me so I'd keep on kissing you."

His smile widened a little. "Just stating facts." Qing Chen's ragged breath was just returning to normal as he swallowed. Feng Xuan saw the movement and reached to touch his throat. He leaned down and met her hand, showering her face with comforting kisses that made her stomach tighten in pleasure. "Are you okay?"

She nodded against his face, not really wanting to wait to feel his kisses again. She caught his lips and her eyes fluttered close. Why had she waited for forty days for this? They should have done this the night they got married. Cold wind blew and she wanted his warmth now more than ever. Her fingers wound tightly on his shirt, pulling him down to her body and deepening their kiss.