Chapter 137 - Unanswered - Part【1】

"Are you warm?" Cronus asks me with a keen softness that lingers in his voice whilst meddling with the radio switching to a different station.

"Yes," I whisper accompanied by a brusque nod. Peering out the window I study the diverse dense trees that encompass the familiar route to my childhood home. We had climbed on Deimos's jet as fast as we could last night and departed my pack lands before Phobos could pursue us, he is an exceptional hunter who values a good chase and we needed to flee as soon as possible if we wanted to evade his wrath.

My male's howl of loss still echoes in the abyss of my mind and I clench my eyes shut my body shuddering as I recall the excruciating despair he held. It was a call indeed, a hopeless plea for me to return to his awaiting arms I could feel it in my soul and every inch of my being. I do not know how many lives will be lost in his relentless pursuit for me, have I been too selfish? Was I too rash and thoughtless to leave him like this?

Our mate journey has not been simple and we have survived through numerous trials and tribulations to be together, the result was falling madly in love. Should I have stayed and worked it out with him? Should I have waited in that tent and expressed to him my feelings, given him a chance to explain himself as both our fury alleviated? If I apologized he would have too I am sure of it. But pride as they say swallows down every rational thought. He betrayed me and I sinned against him in return. Who was wrong who was right I do not know but a future without him I cannot imagine it.

So then what is this? What am I even doing? Am I leaving him forever throwing away our mate bond just like that or am I going to stay away for just a few months and return to him? What is it that I want? How am I supposed to move forward if I am unsure of my wishes?

Cronus offers me his palm faced upwards and places it gently over my lap gathering back my attention. I suppose he has been observing me and caught my internal war. "Hand." He orders and I beam at his inviting palm that has never failed to comfort me in my times of need. When I lay my own in his he squeezes it reassuring me that everything will be all right just like he often did when I was young. "I know how this must be challenging for you. That male of yours possesses your whole body, heart, mind and soul. He has always been the one to rule over your essence. But I need to understand your situation, Theia so I can help you. I need to know why you ran from him."

I remain quiet as before, he had attempted to make me open up to him but I stayed withdrawn needing more time to get my mind around the current situation for my heart continued to ache and bleed that I thought I was leaving shattered pieces of my soul behind for Phobos to pick them up and find his way home to me. Perhaps if I was not much of an emotional female I would have questioned his title as Alpha or even killed Moira in cold blood for touching what was mine but that is not me. I could never do that not to my male or to his dear friend whom he treasures.

Raw bitter tears once more brim in my eyes but I hold them back not allowing a single drop to tumble down my cheeks. I have wept enough since last night I will give myself the rest and tranquillity I require. My wolf is severely weakened by the physical distance between Phobos and me and can barely stand on her paws for I have forcibly ripped her apart from her main source of energy. Phobos's beast. She had gotten used to the power he shared with her that constant radiance but now that she has been abruptly shoved into a frigid pit of darkness it terrifies her. She wants to summon him to show him through the bond where we are right now so he can locate us but is unable to do so for I have shackled her in a cage and this she sees as treachery from me.

She growls and snarls at me with rage and hate for what I have done but I keep my head held high. I had always looked after her my whole life protected her and did whatever she wanted. I carried the pain for both of us so her heart wouldn't feel the weight of our mate's cruelty. But now she will bend to my will.

"Speak to me, little wolf." He implores with an encouraging look in his eyes, that no matter what I will not be judged and can speak freely with him.

"Phobos has a friend. Moira is her name, they have been together way more years than he has been with me. She lost her male in war who apparently seemed to have had an uncanny resemblance to my mate. It seems that Phobos has been permitting her to kiss and touch him each time she got drunk and sought after my male thinking he was hers. Last night I discovered her lips on his."

"Phobos and Moira?" He questions with a baffled expression keeping his eyes on the road, his fingers clutching onto the steering wheel in a tensed grip.

"Yes. And so, I too drunk and kissed another male to spite him. I had never seen Phobos as enraged and resentful as he was yesterday."

"So he hurt you in return? Did he hit you?"

"No, he did not. Phobos would never lay a hand on me that way. But he did hurt me emotionally, I am sure it will leave a scar."

"Then what are those marks on your body?" My cheeks flush with embarrassment and I glance away from his searching gaze clearing my throat as a sign for him to pick up on.