Chapter 40 - Winnie - Part【2】

I begin drying her teats using an unsoiled, fluffy cotton fabric. As I wipe them I am very cautious with my ways making sure that I mistakenly do not scrape or pester the nipples. They tend to be very sensitive, and the cow may twitch and try to kick me if I induce any discomfort.

Setting down the washcloth I catch the first teat and press it down as Phobos showed me a few days ago. I smile as the memory overwhelms my mind. I had complained to him of how I did not comprehend how to milk cattle so he made me squat beside him and clarified to me how to do so. He portrayed a chair as the cow and presented with his hands how to strip the nipple.

Stripping he explained is the method of hauling down a cow's teat in order to remove any grime and bacteria from the milk ducts. The first transfer of milk I mustn't save for it is not clean and should not be utilized.

Peering over at the cow I check if she has enough hay to be diverted with. Clutching the void bucket in between my legs I finally begin milking her for storage. It will be distributed equally among the wolves. I want to take my own container to our house, I wish to perceive his pride in me as I make him something with the fresh milk.

What shall I make, perhaps a fresh cup of warm tea or a pastry of some sort? What about yoghurt or fresh cheese to churn? Would he like these?

"Královna," Drakho calls out to me as I startle free from my thoughts and set my attention towards him.

"Drakho." I simper at him whilst he bows in reverence. Only this wolf truly respects me and treats me by the title I hold.

"I wished to thank you for breakfast. I have never tasted such ambrosial food and I am grateful for being so willing to share it with us." He states as I frown at him with befuddlement. Breakfast? What is this male speaking about?

"I do not understand."

His eyes broaden slightly to my words as he bows once more. "I-I apologize. Alpha Phobos had brought some over to Moira's hut. We ate breakfast together there. I did not know you were unaware of it."

Again, why won't he notify me before doing such things? It is not like I would oppose his wishes I would be delighted to share but why must he do it so confidentially. And that too at Moira's dwelling? It seems as though he has entered her den infinite times before, if so how many?

The irksome picture of him eating at another female's table with her pup happily perched on my moon blessed's lap comes forth to mock me. This connection I possess with him, how does he see it? I wouldn't want to sit at a table alone with any other male than Phobos, but that does not seem to be the same case for him. He partakes in everything with her...everything. At times I wonder if all the things we do together is not as special as I deem them to be. It is so natural for him and so distinct to me.

Does he not treasure each moment we have together as I do? It is as though the second I stepped out of our cottage he hastened to offer our leftovers to her. As though he is her provider and not mine. He could have devoured the oatmeal I cooked on our table yet he favoured to do so at hers. I could never step foot into an unmated male's residence, it is a sin. But Phobos does these things so carelessly that he invariably makes me question myself and everything I have been taught.

I know I mustn't think too much of it. It was not like he was isolated in there with her. Drakho was present and the second shadow Awan whom I have never met as well I suppose. But it perturbs me, like a small band I cannot infiltrate. A place he cannot make space for me.

"I am conscious of it. Thank you for your kind words, I am pleased you savoured my cooking." I speak as his lips tip upward to deliver an effortless smile of gratitude. Lies. I do not want to show him even the most diminutive of cracks I possess in the bond with his Alpha. Yet this is wrong. Aren't I deceiving him?

He walks over to hunker down beside me inspecting the milk I have collected. "You are doing a splendid job. This demands practise yet I am stupefied with how briskly you have perfected it."

"Thank you." My cheeks burn fiercely to his compliment as I peek down at my lap concealing my crimsoning cheeks from his piercing eyes. I barely earn recognition on these lands. Nothing I do seems to be good enough.

"It must be laborious for you to do this."

"Why so?"

"Because of your background. If our roles were reversed I believe I shall be tyrannised by your past pack for the lack of refinement I suppose." He says as he casually blinks up at me gouging for my response to his doubts.

"My pack is very welcoming, Drakho. They would not bully you, they would embrace you. They would familiarize you with our ways."

"Then tell me. Our pack do they bully you?" His question picks me off guard as I visibly freeze and sit upright whilst I contemplate whether I should report to him the truth or not.

"They do not. They are good to me."

"You see it this way purely because of one reason." He answers with a low sigh leaving his lips as he plucks out the weeds from the grass hurling them away.

"And what is that?"

"You are too kind, Luna. Phobos would periodically speak of you with this unusual fondness. Of the kindness you held. Of the strength, the wildness you possessed."

"Truly?" I ask my teeth descending into my lower lip with bashfulness. I knew his friends were aware of my existence when I was a pup but I do know what he chatted about me.

"Yes, Phobos never smiled often but whenever he discoursed of you...he glowed to the point it baffled us. However you were very young, we did not deem you were his female. It came as a shock when he said you were his two months ago. Yet I was the most festive for I had always hoped for and wanted our Luna to be you."

Drakho's words are sincerely compassionate. I know most of the wolves here do not regard me as their Luna but this male. His genuineness towards me never fails to warm my heart. He is an honourable male, a virtuous friend to Phobos and a commendable Beta to this pack.

"I am not fit for this pack though am I?" I ask meekly playing with the fabric of my dress. I do not know why I am querying him this whilst already recognising the actuality. What am I seeking for? Support?

He abruptly begins to laugh the sounds carried through the empty fields resounding all around me noisily and my eyes enlarge. Why is he grinning? Does he perhaps find my question humorous? Or does he discover fact in my words that I cannot seem to comprehend?

"There is no female better than you for us, Královna." He declares with a flash of tenderness in his eyes as he admires me. His truth somehow uplifts my soul from my chaos and doubts of myself. He carries proudly me into salvation.

"You seldom tend to loosen my burdens. I am appreciative of you, Drakho."