Chapter 104: Sword Deviation

"But, what is true love? I don't know the answer. I was just a fat and ugly girl who didn't even deserve love. Do you know when you don't even have bread to eat, even the food in the garbage will feel like cuisine?"

"I was the same. I didn't even have a single man who truly loved me for who I am. I wasn't some beautiful actress or some cute little girl. I was fat, ugly, short, and dumb. I was the worst. Some treated me like garbage, some treated me like a pig, and some treated me like a punching bag."

"Now, I am beautiful, slender, tall, and smart. I am the best. But, people still treat me like garbage to dump their cum, some treated me like a pig hungry for their dicks, and some treated my womb like a punching bag."

"But, there was a difference. Before I only felt hate, frustration, sadness, and I cried, and cried again. But now, I only feel pleasure, happiness, and I moan and moan again. One life for me was hell while another was heaven."

"But, even both of my life, I never loved a person. No, I loved someone when I was in hell. But, when I was in heaven, everyone felt like dust except for you. In this heaven, you are like an angel to me. You are like a lucky charm to me."

At this moment, Qiao Fu touched his forehead with her and said "Do you know what love truly is? Because I don't know. Whenever I think about you, I feel my heart excited. Whenever I see you treating Yue Bin with every bit of love, I feel jealous and sad. Whenever I hold you, I feel like the time has stopped for me."

"I don't want this to happen to me. I don't know if this is truly deep love. But, I know one thing. For you, that goal is like dust to me. For you, even my dream seems like nothing to me."

"Do you know before I feared getting used by someone because of lack of control on my body? Now, I still have the same fear but, this fear has grown to an unprecedented level that I feel my heartbroken every time I think about it."

"But, one thing always keeps me reassured. If I ever betray you, I know you will kill me. No matter how much you say that you won't kill the betrayer until they make move, you can't lie to yourself. I know just by thinking of someone betraying you makes you angry, frustrated, and sad."

"Tell me, Qin, can you truly control yourself when someone betrays you?"

When she asked, Qin turned silent. He was lost in her words. But, her last words made him startled. He couldn't help but chuckle.

"Yeah, you are right. I can't control myself. If someone betrays me, I will slice their throat."

"That's a relief! It means I can continue loving you without any hindrance." Qiao Fu smiled and replied.

"If you truly love me, then just think about controlling your body! I don't think you having sex with someone else is wrong. Because I have sex with you and Yue Bin. The only difference between us is our gender. You also have human feelings and I also have human feelings."

"Of course, I can't accept this. I think I am starting to realize just how selfish I am. I want to get stronger, not caring about others. I want to have you, Yue Bin, Tan sisters by myself. But, this selfishness makes me who I am."

"I can't share my woman with others but my woman must share me with others. Once I said to Yue Bin that I will love a woman that can stare into my eyes and tell me 'If you love someone else, I will kill her in front of you."

"But, now I don't think I can accept. Cultivation has made me selfish. I want the resources for myself. I want girls for myself. And, I want to get stronger by myself. That's my sword cultivation. And, that's everything to me."

"It feels weird to say this. But, I am waiting for a day when I will be able to give up my sword for my women. Because now, I don't think I can do that. I don't want to be selfish."

"No, don't give up the sword." Suddenly, Qiao Fu screamed at him and made him startle. He didn't understand why she said that. But, he gave her a curious gaze.

"Why give up your sword? Sword is everything to you. Dual Cultivation, Devil Cultivation, these are just the path towards your dream. And, what is your dream? It is to have a family. But, that's just a dream. Why do you have a dream?"

"Because you want to achieve something. And, if you become the strongest in this sword, wouldn't it be easy to fulfill your dream? Your swordsmanship doesn't describe your dream. It speaks of your purpose. My dream is to have true love. But, my purpose of life is not that."

"I am still trying to figure out what my purpose truly is. But, you already have that answer in your mind. Your purpose in life is to become a swordsman. That's your original intention. Don't give up your purpose because of woman!"

"If a woman truly loves you, then she will accompany you for the rest of her life even if you simply focus on your swordsmanship. Why? Because that's the love. You will be her obsession. It is hard to give up on dream but it is impossible to let go of your obsession."

"There are many people who have gone to hell, lived the pitiful just because of their obsession. Qin, you have an advantage. My body is obsessed with sex but my mind is not. If both of them were obsessed with sex, I wouldn't be alive now or I might have even surpassed my previous records."

"You are different. Your obsession with swords is nothing wrong. And, both your body and mind are obsessed with swords. Don't give up your swordsmanship for women. You can be selfish. There is no reason to be a sage."

"Remember there is plenty of fish in the sea. If one girl can't accept for who you are, then you just need to find another one."

Hearing her words, Qin remained silent. But, his upper body jerked up as he sits on his butt and coughed out blood.

"Ugh!"

Seeing this, Qiao Fu's eyebrows rose as her eyes widen. She rushed near him and caught his body.

"Qin, what happened?"

"I don't know. It hurts. I don't know why but it hurts. Something it's breaking, my sword belief, it's BREAKING APART. WHY?"

At this moment, Qin screamed as when he found his sword belief breaking apart. He summoned his qi and tried to transform it into the sword energy but it didn't change.

His eyes were filled with disbelief. For a moment of time, his mind couldn't understand what just happened.

"Young Master, this is your first mistake. Thankfully, you only made this mistake at an early stage. A swordsman's original intention never changes. But, just now, you completely changed your original intention."

"Your sword cultivation has been crippled. Now, you have to start from the very basic." Xiao Lan's voice rang on his mind, filled with disappointment and helplessness.

'Impossible! My swords belief is hard as steel. It will never even bend to the will of the strong. Why did it break? Did I really change my sword belief? No, my sword belief didn't change...…..'

'No, my sword belief did change. My sword belief was strong and hard-like. My sword belief is to protect my family. And, if I give up my sword, how can I protect my family? So, I made a mistake huh!'

'Damn! Damn! Damn! Why did I doubt my sword? Was it because of Qiao Fu and her words? No, I doubted my sword because...…. Why? What was the reason?'

'Why can't I find it? It hurts! It hurts so much. Xiao Lan, why does this hurt so much?' Even while training his body, he didn't feel this much pain in his mind. It felt like his soul and body are crumbling down.

"Young Master, sword belief is the very foundation of sword cultivation. It crumbling down means your mind and soul crumbling down. The only way to stop this pain is by finding your true sword belief. Remember, the only reason why your sword belief crumbled was because of your relationships."

"Swordsmanship and Relationships are two different things. You can't merge but you can bring them to a certain equilibrium. If your sword belief is completely based on swordsmanship, you will be the most ruthless and probably the strongest sword. That's my master's swordsmanship."

"This is why he married to his own Sword Soul. And, his son is born from him and sword soul. On another hand, your father's sword belief is Relationships. And, do you know the funny thing, the sword belief based on the relationship are even more ruthless than sword belief based on swordsmanship."

"If swordsman with sword belief on his sword is ruthless to himself then the swordsman with the sword belief on the relation is ruthless to everyone. But, there is one more sword."

"And, that sword is Yin-Yang Harmony Swordsmanship, the sword that balances your sword belief, not letting it fall into swordsmanship and relationship."