Chapter 126: Take It Back

The breeze was almost chilly on the top of my head, so, since I was alone and only going to see some undead wacko nut job, I made myself a toque. I even added a bobble on top, solid black like the rest; I'm sure I painted a funny picture. The tunnel had stairs with glowing torches, but they seem to go one forever.

The fuck is this? There is no way I should have walked this far? I picked up speed, but then stopped quickly at the sound of crackling leaves, or a wheezing noise...was that laughing?

"Listen here you old shit, I'm here to talk so stop pissing around."

"Aren't you the sassy one? Do you talk to all your friends like that?" Replied a toothless wispy old voice.

"King, what is your name? I didn't get that from your granddaughter, my future wife."

I added the last part in to see if I could get a rise out of him, and I was not disappointed. The Undead King made some snuffling and growling noise, like an old bulldog and suddenly, the stones started to grind. The hall closed off in front of me, but the wall to my right opened to a chamber with a throne made from stone with a plain stone capped standing grave.

I walked into the room and it got colder, I could see that the coffin was partially open, so I walked over and gave the stone a bump with my hip and almost completely sealed it.

"Stop! What are you doing? You said you want to talk?" The raspy raver King cried.

"Yeah, don't get your panties in a bunch. I just want to make sure you know that we are on the same page and that I mean business. The whole disco-tech on acid is cool, but the zombies have to stop, or we do it the easy way."

"I am King Ragna! The betrayed and rightful king to the throne of Perdi! But what is this easy way?"

"I close the top of the coffin after turning whatever is left of you into ash, then fill the place in with dirt and put the temple on the moon. You could be king of the disco raver slave traders up there. That is the easy way because I don't have to trust you, you can't stop me, but that's not why I am here. I get it you're pissed about losing your kingdom, but what if I said come work for me and it can be yours?" 

"Woah, who the hell are you, and how can you go around talking like that? Don't you…"

"The snap of my finger old man and I'll put us on the glowing ball into the night sky. I was sent here by Gripton to straighten this shit out, and you are turning into one of those shits. So, do I need to deal with you or will you play along?"

"The Almighty? Why didn't you say so? You're awfully pushy, you know that?"

"Three hundred years and no one has been able to close you back up or reason with you. What did you think was going to happen? I think I am being more than generous with my offer, I can't guarantee that touching your rusty old bones will do anything other than make some grenades, but I will try."

"Then, what do you want from me?"

"Loyalty would be a good start, and the willingness to follow my rules, two imparticular, Slaves and Beastfolk."

"We can increase the number of slaves and ban the…"

"A lot of my wives are beastfolk and most of my people, since we just met I will ignore what you just said and give you a second to shut the fuck up and listen. Slavey is over, we will hire people and pay them, and treat them like you would anyone else. Everyone is equal, or I remove you from this world, and I will find someone else to take your place, got it? And Beastfolk will be treated like humans, or else."

"Anything else oh Great Master?"

"I Swear to god…"

"Okay, I get it slaves and beastfolk are people, and the slaves are now called workers, got it. Wow, I can see why he picked you, no punches pulled. You would have actually put me on the moon, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah, to join the other slavers."

"Wow, what magic do you have?"

"Magic."

"That's vague, but okay, I'll play along. You said you could...what are you doing?"

I had my hand on the coffin lid, and then I flipped the top off with my left hand, and it activated. No point getting sloppy, I was tough, but not invincible, but nothing happened, and I looked inside. It was just bones, no clothes or jewelry, so I looked up at the old King, but he just shrugged and said one word, betrayed. That was a fair point.

I reached in and touched the old bones with my right hand, but it made all of them start to shake.

"Woah, hey, what is going on? Are you tramping me in a box of something…"

The voice of King Ragna trailed off as his ghost was sucked back into his body, which was slowly gaining scraps of flesh. By the time he was done, the body was mostly complete, so I let my magic create a black dress suit. Surprisingly, his face looked mostly young, so I gave him a pair of black gloves to match the suit and hide his disfigured hands.

"There, Mr. King, How do you feel in your fancy new decaying body? Your face looks good, so I covered the rest of you so as not to scare the locals."

"How is this possible? I was dead?"

"Well, you still are dead, just a bit less than you were before? I don't really know how to explain it, but let's head up and you can meet the chicken shits that came with me."