Chapter 286: Sonder

Evin thought about the prize after entering his room.

Aside from maybe Core Shards and World Cores, he really didn't need anything else. It would've also been nice if he could get acquainted with a bunch of runes and their functions as well. 

Evin memorized the two runes he saw when he faced the three mages in the forest, and the two mages in town. He later tried recreating the two runes with a luminous spell and learned the previous one was something specifically anti-shadow and worked best when used with a luminous spell, while the latter one was some kind of rune with binding effects against Dark Mages.

'I thought I'd never find a proper use for this photographic memory of mine aside from cheating tests, but I guess you can find a use for anything if you try hard enough,' Evin thought jokingly.

But this method of memorizing every rune after facing it once wasn't really a good thing in practice. If Evin somehow met an overpowered rune and didn't recognize it at first sight, he could find himself in a very bad spot.

Hence his wish to see and get acquainted with more runes, but honestly, there were simply too many of them. If he used all his contribution points to see runes, he'd very quickly find himself fresh out of points. And besides, if he really wanted to, he could simply enter Gizel's team to get access to all the runes he needed.

Other than that, Evin didn't really have anything else he wanted. Other than of course, "I guess I can ask for research on the emotional effects of Worlds on mages…"

Although he'd already gotten used to the sudden emotional swings that came with casting spells, he still hadn't solved the problem of the Heavy world. Although he had a dozen or so years ahead of him, it didn't hurt to prepare in advance.

He asked Nasst about it in the past, but the old man either forgot about it or didn't find anything useful. If it was the latter case, then the North might not have had any concrete info on subject… but it didn't hurt to try.

Sitting down, he started writing a letter describing his desire for the research. And if that wasn't available, Evin asked for two Core Shards, one for the World of Storms and one for the World of Thoughts. Since he was in an elite team, naturally, he expected the payment to be high.

Kyune had explained to him that having a mana-core that was only fed Dark Core Shards was a bit too excessive. It was best to branch out a bit.

Finished with his letter, he went to give it to Sannah.

"Research on the Worlds' emotional effects? Why such a niche topic?" she asked.

"It's something personal."

"Okay. But I think you can just ask for the four Core Shards with the research included and they'll accept it, you know? If mages want Core Shards, they usually ask for 5 anyway." she reminded, "I really don't think a research paper on a small topic like that would cost that much."

"Oh… I guess you're right," Evin realized and rewrote his letter, to include two World of Storms Shards, a Heavy World Shard, and a World of Thoughts Shard.

"Alright, goodnight for now, then," Sannah waved Evin off.

…

The next day, Saar's slum area. 

Accordingly to the plan, Evin was hiding under the shadow of a tall building, while the rest of Evin's team was stood guard around Dzuko. The tall scholarly man was using his ability to search for the secret base's entrance, scouring every nook and cranny inside the buildings around.

[I kinda wanted to go around people's houses, searching for information, but I guess this is good enough,] Runa said randomly.

[Me too,] added Enri from the side. 

[Huh?] Evin asked, not quite understanding their intents.

Today, Evin had two guests keeping him company in his head, making him feel like a child who had a bunch of imaginary friends inside his head.

[I mean, I always wondered why you liked to do that so much. I sometimes hear you muttering about wanting follow one person or another. Maybe if I see someone living inside their own house, doing things, I can understand it a bit more,] Runa explained. 

[Oh, then… Runa, do you think that you have more vivid and complex lives compared to other people?] Evin asked.

[I do. After all, I'm a World Sprite turned into a metal skinshifter, who calls a human as my brother. And sometimes I find myself thinking about the meaning of familial relationships a lot, since all my siblings are World Sprites…] Runa said some very deep things.

[How about you, Enri?]

[I can't say I feel that my life is dull. It has many happy moments but it has many negative moments, as well. But hearing your stories, I always find myself thinking that's life.]

'Empress almighty, these two think too much. But I guess it's natural since they're being raised by two cynical idiots,' Evin thought before continuing.

[Alright, have you ever heard of a term called Sonder?]

The two girls mentally shook their heads.

[It's a word that describes a certain emotion. Sonder is a feeling when you realize that everyone you see, everyone who passes you by has their own rich and complex life. Their life has the same kind of feelings as yours does - with heartache and happiness, and routines, family, and everything else that happens in life.]

The two girls mentally nodded slowly, digesting the meaning of Evin's words.

[You don't have to be a sentient blood, or a sentient piece of metal to be special. Everyone in the world is special. The things that happen to you don't have to be bizarre or out of the ordinary to be considered interesting. Some people like watching a fire, some people like watching rivers, some people like watching animals from a distance. Heck, you could even enjoy doing literally nothing, but it doesn't chance the fact that you still think and feel during those moments.]

[Is that why you like observing other people so much?] Runa asked.

[Mhm. I guess I can call it my own method of 'living',] Evin said wistfully.

Now that he thought about it, there really wasn't any other way for him to 'live' aside from doing this when he was a spirit. All the interesting things were happening to everyone around him and all he could do was be happy he could witness them. He couldn't even be a proper part of it. The highest honor he could get as a spirit was the title of an emotionally invested bystander.

'I should probably treasure this life a lot more, huh…' Evin thought before shaking his head and looking towards his team again. He could think of these topics in the future. For now, he needed to focus on the mission. 

Enri and Runa also seemed to fall in thought, as Evin could feel them eyeing the rest of his team intently. No doubt wondering what kind of life they led to get to this point.

As time passed in this manner for a bit, Evin finally saw the sign of regrouping from Sannah.