Chapter 66 - Secret Love, Secret Life

Dane

She stayed overnight, though in the circumstances it was unwise—and he barely touched her. He'd just wanted her close. And she hadn't seemed to want to leave. To hell with it. He'd get a warning if Chris came back, or someone else showed up. Worst case scenario, he could send her home via the laundry when he went to the door. He knew he wouldn't sleep, though he hoped she would. And she did. Deeply. And from almost the first moment her head hit the pillow. She curled up in a ball like a child, dwarfed in one of his own sleep shirts that he never wore. He'd had to give it to her because she hadn't planned to stay. He was going to have to tell her to keep a little bag packed and store it in the stairwell, or something.

He didn't want her to have any reason to leave.

Dane rolled over slowly so he didn't disturb her and just watched her. He hadn't been able to bring himself to close the curtains tonight. He couldn't stand the oppressive dark. So he could see her pale skin in the light from the bright moon above, and the city below. It almost made her glow. She was curled, one hand under her pillow, the other at her chest.

He ached to touch her, but didn't want to wake her. He'd put her through enough today. So instead he turned his mind to the future. She was a gift from heaven. He had no idea why God would have allowed her to come into his life, but it was for damn sure that he couldn't afford to screw it up. Yet he kept failing. Falling. And she kept catching him.

He had to do something for her. Something to show her that he was worth fighting for. Worth waiting for.

He still couldn't believe she wanted him. The moments they'd stolen at the office this week weren't enough. He needed her. Needed to be inside her—to bring them together. But…for her it needed to be special. Not just good but worthy of the gift she was giving him. Yet work overwhelmed them both and the need for secrecy meant they couldn't gain help from anyone else for their planning…

He had to make time alone with her. Real time. Uninterrupted. And unbroken by work. He knew there was one place they could go. But it would mean letting her into his safest place. The place he shared with no one. The plans he'd made to save his own life if his father had ever come for him.

She was worth it. He didn't doubt it. But knowing his secrets meant carrying his burdens. Because if his father ever did show up, and tried to make her share what she knew…

Dane shivered and slowly scooted himself closer to her, using a soft finger to pull a piece of hair back off her face, then froze when she shifted.

Lila frowned in her sleep and hunched, mumbling something about cold, then inched toward him, pressing herself into his chest and sighing happily when she got there. Her breathing returned to the long, slow evenness she'd had before he touched her. But now her face was nestled in his neck, and she gripped his waist.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Dane let his arm settle over her and curled around her, pulling her in until they touched at every curve—like yin and yang.

Yes…she was worth it. No doubt in his mind. The question was, should he let her continue to believe him worth what she might be asked to give in return? Because he was equally sure he wasn't worth the potential cost.

But maybe he was just selfish enough to let her risk the price anyway.

*****

Lila

She woke in his arms, warm and cradled. Somehow during the night she'd rolled into him. And when she woke up, it was to find herself under his arm, pressed into his chest, and…held. He was holding her, embracing her.

His breath was slow and even. She didn't want to wake him so she lay there, happily drowning in his smell—the crisp scent of his aftershave, and that pine and spice smell that was uniquely him. It came from the shirt she wore that had ridden up to her waist during the night. And it came from his skin, so warm around her.

She sighed happily into his chest and he stirred—jerking awake and pushing up on one elbow before he blinked and realized where he was.

"Shhhhh, go back to sleep if you can. It's early," she whispered, putting a hand to his neck so he'd lay back down.

His eyes puffy with sleep, he blinked down at her. Then he smiled and she thought it was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.

"Good morning, beautiful." His voice was rough and deep from sleep. She wanted to giggle. Instead she let her hand slide down to his firm chest and smiled back.

"Good morning, handsome."

"Did you sleep okay?" he asked carefully.

"That was the best night's sleep I've had in weeks," she said honestly. Being close to him had made her feel…right.

"Me too," he whispered and leaned down to kiss her. She let her fingers slide into his hair as she kissed him back.

She lost herself in his touch and his lips, in the gentle ways he said her name and kissed his way down her neck. She wondered if this might finally be their moment, but far too soon, the alarm on his phone began shrieking.

With a groan he rolled over and tapped the screen to stop it, then slumped back onto the bed on his back, one arm curled under his head, and stared at the ceiling.

Lila scooted over to rest her head on his chest, but all the warm softness in him was gone. She could feel his tension rising with each breath. And she knew she couldn't stop it. He had hell to face today. They'd had a nice little break from it for a while, but now…now they had to get back to the real world.

"Will you come back tonight?" he asked quietly, without looking at her.

"Do you want me to?"

He turned his head and met her eyes. "Always."

She gave him a skeptical look and he turned to face her. "This day is going to suck, Lila. I mean, really. The coming weeks are going to break me. Knowing I have you to look forward to…it might keep me sane. Please come. We might be late, but…please come."

She let the smile creep up. "Of course I will."

.

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