210 the joker

After I saw the bodies I was in shock and pain

Why the hell is this happening?

Why is this happening to me?

Damn it

Damn it

I put my hand on my head and started crying

I felt like I was a big fool

Is it because of my stupid decision?

All of these people are dead Because of me

If I hadn't left, I could have saved them Or would I die with them?

I don't know what was gonna happen 

Fuck everything. Fuck my ideas

My tears were not stopping 

I felt like I'm being strangled from the inside I felt so much sadness 

Of the 50 people that landed on this damn island 

Only four people are left.

46 people died in a moment and disappeared of the face of the world and I was alone with three other people  

all the people who entered this island and joined the heroes facility

They just came here because they believed in me and I really let everyone down

How stupid and reckless I was. 

I realized how high the sky is 

I'm just a bug in this miserable world.

Everybody stood  there Looking at the bodies

I stood on my feet with great difficulty then started moving towards the camp

I held a piece of wood as I'm looking at the eyes of the dead bodies

And I started digging

My hand was shaking as I was digging

I feel like I can't even keep standing on my feet 

My tears never stopped going down

It didn't stop and it never wanted to stop

I started digging graves for each one of the bodies then I put the bodies inside

I felt that every body of them was looking at me

I lifted the body alone and put it in the grave, their bodies were heavy and they smelled of blood 

Their eyes were scared 

My hand was shaking so much as I was carrying them 

But they have the right to be buried

After a while Rami joined me after he got out of the shock he was in

He started digging with me and carrying the bodies

The girls were sitting at a distance crying and watching what was happening 

Would that be our fate if we continued staying on this island?

Rami was moving around, lifting the bodys on his shoulder and burying them

We kept going until Rami and I buried the last body

I felt a great regret in my heart 

Until I got to the point that I felt I was gonna burn from the inside

Like fire was going to come out of my heart and burn all my inner organs

Really fuck this world

I put my hand on my head and I look at the graves in front of me

All this graves

For some We couldn't even collect all their body parts 

And I think we've misplaced some body parts by mistake

But we must continue on this island

We've killed so many monsters from that moment

I even was able to kill a level B monster by myself 

I was so angry as the anger was burning my heart

I felt like I had to end everything in this world

Fuck monsters

Snd fuck that anger that inhabits my heart

With one skill strike, I was killing monsters without mercy

The whole world was surprised by this 

Everyone was really shocked by my strength

But no one knew the fire that inhabited my heart

Fire that can burn everything in the world

The news outside were focused on the most important title. the new hero named Leith

Everyone thought I'd be the next hope for mankind

But do I really deserve it

Is there is hope for humanity

after a lot of time, and many dead monsters later Celian, Rami and Tama

They could use their skills quicker and more easily 

So we were able to kill a lot of monsters

My strength were rising faster and faster

Now firecats gets killed with one hit from Celine hands 

Celine who screamed every time she saw little mouse

Now is killing monsters with empty eyes

This world really changes people

It changes them harshly and mercilessly

We're now are different people from when we came on this island

But when I close my eyes

I see that guy

The one eyed man in the fucking weelchairl 

Who stays quiet for a moment and laughs and mock like he's mocking the whole world

Like he's making fun of everything else in this fucking world

He seemed to care about nothing

I feel like he is locked inside of me, and that he wants to break the chains and get out

I was looking in his eyes for a moment

When I did I saw some strange memories

Memories of strange faces

A face that I have never saw before 

Memories of moments that I don't know anything about

And all that stuff I don't remember that I don't understand 

Bbu for some reason it makes me sad and want to cry

I don't know why I feel all that pain inside me

Why do I have all this suffering

Is this me and this guy the same person

Every time I try to get close to him, I wake up

I couldn't once touch him

But I heard him say

"Everyone will betray you eventually, you will lose everything, no matter how hard you try to win."

He used to say that while crying tears of blood

He looked more scary than anything in the world

The days went by 20 went by fast 

And the plane that brought us  to this island

She took us back as we headed to the hero facility

But it's weird that everyone was busy

Fear was all over their face seems like something big has happened in the world

And there's a lot of whispers

I found out then that everything that happened to us was podcast every where 

But most whispers weren't because of us

I heard one of the soldiers say

"I didn't expect the Joker to appear again."