60 You didn’t give me a chance

Flash back from that day 8 years ago flashed thru my eyes. I was like a ghost looking at the scene in the hotel room. I can see my younger self crying, kneeling on the floor and begging. A man is standing in front of my younger self. I can't see his face clearly.

"Please listen to me. I'm not in a relationship with Brad. I was set up." My 19-year old self was begging at the feet of the man. "I was set up."

The man was silently standing in front of my younger self. I can see him clenching his fist so hard that I was afraid it would bleed.

"Sister how can you say that? After what we just saw you think we would believe you?" Julia said.

'This bitch. Even in the past she is such a snake. All words coming from her are poison.' I thought. I look at the younger Julia.

"No!" my younger self shouted. "You're the only one I love. Please believe me. Give me a chance."

The man slapped my younger self's hand away. She was in shock. Tears flowed from her face non-stop.

The man turned around and walked towards the door. When he got near where I was silently standing his face became clearer and clearer.

"Shawn?" I was surprised. His face a lot younger than it is now in the present. His dark blue eyes were burning with fury. His face was filled with the mixture of anger and pain.

He passed thru me. I was just a ghost here watching. I looked behind and looked at his back leaving my younger self seating on the floor crying.

My heart ached so bad. I instinctively hold my chest in pain.

***

I was back in the present. I was seating on the floor after Julia attacked me. My head was splitting in pain together with the ache I was feeling in my chest.

"Baby are you alright. Where are you hurt?" Shawn said worriedly. He was holding me in his arms.

I look at him with fearful eyes. "You didn't believe me." I whispered.

"What did you say?" Shawn didn't hear me.

"You didn't give me a chance. You didn't hear me out!" I shouted.

Shawn looked at me with surprise.

"Let go of me!" I shouted and pushed Shawn away from me.

"Queenie, what are you saying?" Shawn was confused and looked at me in shock.

"That day when this happened to me. You didn't give me a chance to explain. You didn't even hear me out." Tears are falling in my face.

"You remember?" Shawn said softly.

"Yes I remember now!" I shouted. "If you just gave me a chance. My baby... my baby." I was crying and holding my tummy. I can't stop the tears from falling. I remember our child who wasn't given a chance to be born in this world.

"Queenie... I-I'm sorry." Shawn was now fearful. His voice was shaking. He reached out his hand to touch me.

"Don't touch me!" I slapped his hand away. "If you just let me explain back then our baby should have been alive now! This wouldn't have happened!"

Shawn was silent. Tears are starting to fall from his beautiful dark blue eyes. "Oh baby I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I know it was my fault back then. Please give me a chance." He was begging.

"Chance?! Did you give me a chance back then?" I said full of anger.

I stand up and rushed outside. Shawn quickly followed me and held my hand to stop me.

"Queenie please... please forgive me. It's my fault. I'll do anything please. Just don't leave me." Shawn's words was full self loathing. He was crying and looked pitiful.

"I'm sorry." I said softly. "I don't want to see you again." Shawn's face looked shock. He was frozen in place.

I pulled off my hand from his grasp and ran towards the elevator. The elevator was open and was just about to close.

"Please hold the doors." I requested the woman that was inside the elevator. I entered the elevator.

"Queenie wait!" Shawn's voice was just around the corner of the corridor. Then I see him running towards me. I press the close button repeatedly.

"Queenie wait. Please let me explain." Shawn was running to chase me before the doors closed.

The doors are slowly closing. I look at his beautiful face. He was the man I have loved. The man I whole heartedly given my whole life. When he was about to reach me I look into his eyes. His dark blue eyes was gleaming with sadness. His face was just in front of me in the little opening of the door. His face was full of sadness and fear. Then the doors shut.

By then I cried. I cried with all my heart.