Chapter 29 - You'd Make A Great Husband

We reach 100 votes again this week on QT: No To Bad Boys! As promised in the bribes list, here's another chapter.

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[Did you watch the news?]

[Yeah. Cheap movie producers have no heart, are they really just going to allow these things to happen until someone dies?]

[It's probably just a publicity stunt! People are getting more creative this days, and it's a supernatural action movie. The actor still survived!]

[He only survived because a staff member managed to catch him in time. Besides, if it's a publicity stunt, why did the production go into indefinite hiatus? Why we're everyone involved dismissed until further notice?]

"Ashton, let's eat. Dinner's ready."

The knock on the door surprised the young actor, but he pretended to go be sleeping when he recovered.

Knock! Knock! "Ashton... I know you're upset. You can talk to me about it, but you shouldn't skip meals like this."

He wanted to tell the person by the door to leave him alone, but also felt bad to do so.

Henry saved his life. If it weren't for him visiting his film shooting that day..... going out even when he's extremely agoraphobic...

He would have been six feet under by now. Fate was kind to give him a friend like this.

But.....

Was fate really kind if it took away the greatest opportunity he had in years to be a star?

Maybe it was telling him that it wasn't meant to be. That he isn't cut out for it.

Just a simple jump, it's not even supposed to be that dangerous, and he messed it up. He also ruined the reputation of the production company in the process. Just one jump.

Yet.... When he remembered looking down from the five-story height that day, and to the ground..... The distance looked bigger than it was. It was so high up that his stomach twisted and he felt like he was seeing an endless spiral of circles reaching down to Earth's core itself...

Why did he suddenly become like that? He doesn't have a fear of heights before, he loved going on the tallest rollercoaster possible. But a five-story building made him chicken out and lose his footing.

"Ashton..." 'Henry' knocked again. "Ashton, please open the door."

He sluggishly stood up and look at himself in the mirror. He had been in bed for 18 hours, crying non-stop but keeping his voice low so Henry wouldn't hear.

It was obvious on his pallid face. His eyes were red, and his hair looked like it got in the middle of a hurricane. His blue pajamas sagged to the side, and his breath stink.

"You're ugly."

A voice said in his head.

"How can you be a famous actor if you're ugly?"

"Just moping around for a day is enough to make you look like a hideous monster. How do you expect to last days of tours not being able to eat or sleep properly for days and still look good in front of fans?"

It seems almost like the mirror was the one saying these things to him. He aimed to punch it...

But he can't.

"Weak."

"You'll never be an actor if you're this weak. Do you expect people to love you if you can fuck up such a simple thing?"

"The showbiz industry's gonna eat you alive."

"Should have stayed in the countryside with the chickens and pigs. That's where you belong."

Ashton put his hand over his ear and shook his head. "Enough!"

The voices stopped.

But Henry became even more worried. The doorknob shook frantically. "Ashton, what's wrong? Let's talk, just let me in!"

This made Ashton choke up a bit. It was Henry himself who told him, his voice being the loudest of the bunch:

"Are you sure you're ready for this?"

Unlike the others, it was a genuine question, not a form of mockery. But that's what makes it even more painful. Because even Ashton himself isn't sure.

Yet Henry trusted him anyway. Henry joined him to travel from Kansas to Hollywood, with their piggyback savings and the extra money loaned to him by a museum curator.

He let him down. Perhaps one day, Henry will lose patience in him and see through his bravado, and leave him on this road to an impossible dream that he will never reach.

Ashton closed his eyes, and composed himself. He wore his signature bright smile, and slowly opened the door.

"Hey." He said, a little coyly. "I'm fine---"

"Ash!"

He did not expect to be immediately tackled into a hug.

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A few minutes earlier....

"Shit, Panda! What do I do!? The boy's not eating or leaving his room at all!" Zhe Chouhen pulled at his hair while making pancakes. For dinner.

The Daoist Panda on his phone was also making something, wearing a pink apron with a whisk and bowl in hand. [Why are you surprised? You've read this part in the novel already, Henry's actions would cause Ashton to be so depressed, and he would be in the lay low until you paint him in 2019 to cheer him up.]

"But I didn't expect him to be so depressed that he'd starve himself to death!" Zhe Chouhen flipped the pan angrily.

[Zhe Chouhen, it's only been a day. He'll survive. Besides, isn't it your reasoning for your 'Catch-Me Plan' to work is that you would definitely be able to catch Ashton since he can't die as the MC?] Daoist Panda frowned. [Even I can survive a day without eating food. I even wrote for 24 hours straight one day just to catch up to an update.]

"That doesn't change the fact that it's unhealthy! Both you and Ashton should change your habits!"

The Panda just rolled his eyes. [Aren't you always calling me fat? Now you're worried about me skipping meals. Pick a side, bro.]

"That's just a joke, bro." He had the urge to rub Panda's head. "Eat well and take care of yourself, I can't take enough stress as it is handling two anorexic kids at the same time."

Daoist Panda looked away, pink lines on his cheek. [I didn't ask for your sympathy..... I can handle myself.]

"Just stay healthy, okay? Don't give me another headache." Zhe Chouhen poked his cheek. "What are you cooking anyway?"

[I'm not cooking, I'm baking. It's a cake.]

"Oh, what for?"

[It's a secret. Just pay attention to your pancakes.] Daoist Panda chuckled lightly. [Who the hell makes pancakes in the middle of the night?]

"They're Ashton's comfort food." Zhe Chouhen said. "Don't you know this as an author?"

[A lot of things that I didn't write happen anyway, and his favorite food bears no importance in Painted Lies.]

But deep within his heart, Daoist Panda was impressed by how thoughtful Zhe Chouhen was to remember the MC's favorite food.

He watched him using Henry Basildon's appearance, carefully placing the pancakes into a plate and arranging them into roses. He even carefully cut out a butterfly, put it on a stick, and let it fly by the sweet and tasty flower.

He claims he's not an artist, but he sure is imaginative, he'll give him that.

He has so much focus under those rimless glasses of his, and he mindlessly adjusted them from time to time whenever they slid off from him moving around too much to make sure everything was perfect. The worry was written on his face, and you know immediately that this gesture is not out of the character he was portraying. Henry would not effort this much, or show his affection in such a weird but wholesome way.

Only Zhe Chouhen would.

Daoist Panda reached his paw on the screen, wanting to ease those creases on his eyebrow.

Zhe Chouhen shouldn't be this worked up over Ashton or Daniele. They don't deserve it. They don't deserve him, none of them does.

Even when he claims that Zhe Chouhen is being too boastful about being a good lover....

He truly is.

And that would make the brotherhood despise him more. Making his life even more difficult. Because he's not acting how they predicted.

[You'd make a perfect husband.] He found himself blurting out, and quickly covered his mouth.

"What?" Zhe Chouhen suddenly stopped laying down the slice of butter in the middle of the pancake rose and dripping it with maple syrup.

[Nothing!]

He stopped decorating and wiped his hand on his apron, picking up his phone. "Hey, hey. I heard that~ Don't deny it now, you said I'd make a perfect husband!"

[S-So what?] Pink circles were around his cheek again. [Just accept a compliment without another word, neither bragging nor denying. Have your parents never taught you that?]

"But it's from Panda-laoshi, how can I not react?" Zhe Chouhen's mischievous hand tickled his icon again. "Aww, Panda-laoshi thinks I'd make a good husband~ Panda-laoshi wants to have me as his husband~"

[I didn't say that! Just go wake up Ashton already!]

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Back to the present...

Zhe Chouhen felt his shoulders getting wet, and his worry increased tenfold.

"Ashton, WHY ARE YOU CRYING---- Ahem, why are you are crying?" He forgot for a moment that he have to put up a calm, well-mannered gong act. "Was it something I did? I'm sorry I did not call you earlier, I just thought you might want some space---"

"I'm sorry.... Sob..... Sob..... I failed you.... I failed our dream...."

Despite his tough resolve not to cry when Henry is around, the moment that he was embraced so sweetly like this by the very person he failed, he cannot stop from breaking down.

Zhe Chouhen felt a great pain in his heart just as strong as all the suffering he experienced back in hell from seeing Ashton like this. Someone so bright, and cheerful, so full of life.... shouldn't be degraded into something like this.

And it was all this world's fault. Henry's fault.

(I'm not the character I'm playing..... This is all fiction... Don't get attached.....) He reminded himself again and again.

As 'Henry', he lifted Ashton's chin up. "What do you mean you failed me? You can never fail me, Ash. Whether you become a star or not."

He wiped his tears away. "Besides, this isn't your only chance. You're still young. That's the one thing we should treasure most, we're still young, and we should be free to take some risks and some mistakes. Just keep on trying and eventually you'll get there...."

He heard a buzz, the buzz for OOC alert. Zhe Chouhen sighed in his heart.

"But." He had to add even if he doesn't want to. "Why don't you stay at home and recover for a while? You can still try new hobbies besides acting, maybe you will find another passion during this break, maybe you will not. But you should take time for your own mental health, and stay with me instead."

"I'll always be here for you. In our home."

Ashton choke in tears again, and hugged him tighter. "Thank you..... You're the only one I have, even my family did not believe in me, none of our friends back in Kansas did..... But you still stayed with me."

"Yes..... Even if everyone leaves you, I won't." 'Henry' patted his head. "No matter what happens."

"Now, come! Let's eat some pancakes, I know you feel better when you eat them."

"M-Mn!" Ashton nodded.

He saw the whole plate of meticulously prepared rose pancakes, and even the pretty butterfly. He can't help but be touched again. "Man..... You shouldn't have done all this for me! This....Sniff..... This is too much!!!"

"Nothing is too much when it's for you, Ashton." 'Henry' gave him a smile. "Come on, let's have pancakes for dinner."

After having their meal and consoling Ashton further, something flashed on Zhe Chouhen's mind.

Once he went asleep in bed, he took his phone again and opened the Daoist Panda.

Daoist Panda had a table in front of him, lazily twirling his fork as he ate a chibi cake alone. His hand was resting on his face, looking rather gloomy. His beady eyes suddenly widened when Zhe Chouhen suddenly opened his app.

[H-Hey, why are you here?] He quickly pushed away the cake to the side, looking flustered. [Are you going to check the Meters----]

"Happy Birthday." Zhe Chouhen said with a warm smile.

Daoist Panda reddened like a tomato, very surprised. [H-How did you.... know it was my birthday???]

"I remembered it now. I saw it once on your Weibo account. I just forgot for two years..... But since you baked a cake out of nowhere, I got a hint." Zhe Chouhen flicked his chin. "Why didn't you say anything and would rather celebrate your birthday so lonely like that? This time, whenever it's June 21, I will not forget to greet you and give you a belly rub as a gift~"

[Again, I'm not an animal! Don't bother, I'm fine being alone. Just focus on Ashton---]

"There, there." Zhe Chouhen patted his head. "Don't feel so lonely anymore. I'll always be here."

The man hiding behind a Daoist Panda icon faltered in controlling his avatar, and couldn't help his lips from quirking up. His heart was stirring into something he shouldn't, something dangerously close to...

"No." He shook his head. "Love is for the weak, the manipulated, and the abandoned. I..... I shall not Love again."

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Ok, I'm getting desperate and pathetic so now I'm willing to accept bribes. I get jealous easily of other books that have a huge following and get sad everytime, thinking what's the point of writing if I feel like no one's reading/appreciate it.

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