318 The Artist, a Bit Emotional

Yujia blinked. Hearing his story made her wordless. She thought her childhood was bad. Yet in comparison to what Zixu went through, what could she complain about?

"You were… so young, when that happened," she whispered.

"For the better, I suppose. I had time to process things. I had time to move on," he replied quietly.

"Yet…" her voice trailed off. Tears pricked at the corner of her eyes and she looked up, blinking repeatedly in an attempt to stop then from falling. When she looked back down, she glanced over at Zixu, who was staring at her with wide eyes. She immediately reached a hand up to wipe her eyes, sniffling her nose once before saying, "I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm crying. It's just—"

Imagining the pain that Zixu, as a child, had to go through brought tears to her eyes. She just couldn't stop these emotions, no matter how hard she tried.

Zixu, who wore a distant expression the entire time he was telling the story of his past, now put on an awkward smile. "Come on now. Don't cry. It's been ten years for me since those days. In just a few more months, it'll be eleven."

She glanced down. "I wish… I wish I had been there for you," she said, "Even though I know it's impossible. I can imagine how lonely it must've been."

He agreed, "I admit that there were days of loneliness." With a brief pause, he continued, "I had Ziyang by my side, though. He didn't fully understand, from how young he was and how distanced he was from our mother. Yet he had always been there for me. This is likely why we have such a deep bond. Later on in life," he mused, "I also drew from the solitude to develop hobbies in the things that I loved to do. If not for the fact that my mother separated from my life, I would not have developed my love for art. Those years with her were far too stressful for my child self to pursue any interests."

"It's amazing how you can find such light in these situations," she noted.

"Time does that. I'm far too much of a pessimist, but enough time has passed for me to find the few bits of good that I can in this situation." 

At this, she scrunched up her face. "I'm going to cry again."

"Don't cry," Zixu said again, letting out a small laugh. "I wouldn't know what to do if you cried."

"I'm sorry for being so emotional," she apologized once more, covering her face. "I shouldn't even be the one crying."

"Hey," he said, gently, "it's alright. Don't worry."

Then, he reached out his arms. She accepted the hug, burying her face into his shoulder.

After a moment of silence, she murmured, "Thank you for telling me about your past, though. It really means a lot to me."

Yujia pulled away. Gazing firmly into Zixu's eyes, she told him, "I will never see you as any lesser because of your past. I want you to know that."

"I know." He smiled, softly.

She glanced down again. Reaching out and taking Zixu's warm hand, lacing her fingers with his, she continued, "I'm truly, truly happy we had this conversation tonight."

"Even if you were crying?" he teased.

Glaring, she protested, "I cry because I get emotional easily at sad stories, alright?" 

Except, she then paused, realizing that throughout all the sad stories she had heard, she had never really cried like this. Even if she wasn't truly crying in this situation, merely having her eyes water up, this wasn't the typical case. There was just something about Zixu's story which had tugged at her heartstrings, moving an instinctive emotion buried within the depths of her heart.

"You are making me a more empathetic person," she muttered after arriving at this conclusion.

"I am? I thought you were making me more empathetic," he replied, eyebrows raised.

Yujia raised her eyebrows in return. "We are both going to become super emotional creatures, then." She poured both of them a cup of wine. "Cheers?"

He gave a slight grin. "Cheers."

…

The two shared a few more drinks, but either due to the small size of the cups or the giant size of the jar, a good portion of wine was still left behind.

Yujia thought for a long while about what they were going to do, then arrived at a splendid idea.

She patted the side of the jar, smiling brightly at Zixu. "Let's bury this. Besides, this kind of wine is better the more it ages."

"Where shall we bury, do you say?" he asked.

She fastened the cloth stopper of the jar, holding it in her arms as she moved across the courtyard. Underneath the unblossomed white plum tree, she stopped in her steps. 

"Here. It's an easy place to remember." 

Zixu followed behind her, looking up at the tree. 

She went on, "For your birthday, towards the end of the year, let's dig it back and have a drink. Doesn't that sound wonderful?" 

He nodded in agreement. "By that time, shouldn't the tree also have blossomed?"

"En. I can already imagine it, with the snow, the plum blossoms, and the wine. It'll be straight out of a poem or painting, don't you think?" she grinned a little more. 

"This is a plan for sure, then," he agreed.

Because of the loose soil underneath the tree, after finding a shovel-esque tool in her courtyard, it was not difficult to dig a jar-sized hole, perfect for burying the wine. The two of them worked on that, content by the end at the knowledge of their future plan.

Yujia stood back up. She glanced at the full moon, then glanced back at Zixu. 

He looked up at the moon too. "It's about time that I have to go, isn't it?" he said.

"Are you going to go out the same way you came in? Through climbing?" she glanced back at the wall with disbelief.

He eyed a corner of her courtyard, one with a stone statue in the shadows. She traced his gaze and saw his plan to climb over the wall, even if he did not explain it. "That would be the easiest and most discreet way." 

Yujia had to agree. "Alright." 

She walked him to the side of the wall, then stopped. Zixu turned around to her.

"I'm really glad you came to visit me tonight," she said, giving him a smile, "but I'll miss you. Try to visit again soon, alright? Or I might have to break into the Yu Villa next time."

He laughed. "I'll see what I can do." 

"But," she added on, "that doesn't mean to come frequently. Especially not at night. You need to be sure to sleep more. Take care and get some rest. Don't overwork yourself."

"I will. You won't be seeing any eyebags or dark circles," he assured. 

"Good."

She moved forward and hugged him again, staying in his embrace for just one more moment. After that, she gazed up at him, pausing.

Maybe it was because of the moonlight cast over them. Or maybe it was because of the wine that they had sipped at, not enough to take away their sobriety but enough to encourage what was about to happen. Or maybe it was the absolute silence in the moment.

Zixu leaned down, their noses barely touching. And then, he was gently capturing her lips with his.

His lips were soft, barely parted, brushing against hers. Her eyes fluttered shut. Time did not stop or slow down. But in that moment, all she could think about was him, the feeling of his fingers against the side of her face, his warm breath and hers, his lips caressing hers. 

The kiss was clumsy. Tentative. Simple. Yet she could not think of anything more perfect. 

For the two of them, it was just right.