Paranoid Love Affair

Episode 41

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There was a reason why people always wanted to invite Ji-eun to a drinking party.

At the drinking party with Ji-eun, there were no quarrels or sensitive conversations; the most that happened was that there were people who drank too much and fell asleep.

There were few people who clearly recognized that it was Ji-eun’s charm, and there were still many people who felt comfortable drinking with Ji-eun.

However, Ji-eun was not the one to lead the story at the drinking party.

She didn’t even play the role of raising the mood by unraveling a lot of interesting stories.

Nevertheless, the reason why people like drinking with Ji-eun is because Ji-eun is a very intelligent person.

Ji-eun naturally changed the topic if it seemed that there would be any sensitive talk, and if someone felt offended, she joked about it and tried to lighten the mood.

As a result, drinking parties with Ji-eun were always pleasant and only pleasant stories were shared.

When someone had something to celebrate, the topic lasted for a long time, and the talk of politics, society, and religion only appeared briefly before being buried due to Ji-eun’s skill.

When it comes to arguing at a drinking party with Ji-eun, at best, there are only useless stories about whether mint chocolate is delicious or not, and eating sweet pork with soup and eating it with dipping sauce.

For reference, Ji-eun likes mint chocolate and the pork is eaten by soup if the person you eat with you likes bibimbap, and if you like dipping sauce, eat it with dipping.

[Bibimbap: Bibimbap is served as a bowl of warm white rice topped with namul (sautéed and seasoned vegetables) or kimchi (traditional fermented vegetables) and gochujang (chili pepper paste), soy sauce, or doenjang (a fermented soybean paste). A raw or fried egg and sliced meat (usually beef) are common additions. ]

Maybe the reason Ji-eun doesn’t get drunk often is because she doesn’t relax even at a drinking party with close friends.

There are many reasons why people fight at a drinking party, but the root cause is that they unintentionally or intentionally poach an important part of someone else’s self-image and identity.

For example, if someone has been attending church for more than 20 years, he or she will likely see the story of religion as a key component of their thoughts and lives.

So he or she is more sensitive to any talk about it than others.

Whether that’s a good story or a bad story…

People usually live their lives respecting each other whenever possible, but it changes when alcohol is added.

And there will be people who have conflicting core parts of their self-image and want to talk about it.

For example, if you have a completely different political view… … .

Then, why meet people like colleagues and drink together?

No! You just have to talk about something else when you meet.

Instead of trying to delve deep into each other, we just need to talk about something that makes us laugh together.

At the drinking party, Ji-eun showed an excellent ability to read the moods of such people and change the topic naturally.

In fact, it was also because that was Ji-eun’s self-image.

She thought that making the people she meets happy and comfortable is her most core value.

She was a person who thought that if she turned around and shouted in anger at a drinking party even once, the people who were looking for her would disappear in an instant.

Of course, Ji-eun did not voice such thoughts into sentences and engrave them only in her heart.

However, Ji-eun was also vaguely feeling that such a self-image dominates the backbone of her emotions and actions, so far that has been the case.

But not today. She was Ji-eun, who was not very drunk even when she drank alcohol, but today she was drunk with Yoon-woo’s words.

She was drunk on the matter of pretty earrings.

The key component that makes up herself today is not herself who watches others well and sets the mood, but Yoo Ji-eun, a sophomore in economics department who Yoon-woo thinks is pretty and witty, and looks good with earrings.

Perhaps it was because the parts constituting her backbone changed abruptly.

In fact, even if she wasn’t a person who pays attention to her eyes, she would have noticed that Hye-rim’s look was strange.

Because she saw Hye-rim’s face hardened noticeably, and her voice was also quiet for a few seconds.

“It suits noona really well,” she said. “After all, noona is Ji-eun. You should have been doing things like this before…”

“Is that so? Uhh.. thank you. From what I can see, this looks pretty good.”

“Yeah. So… What happened all of a sudden?”

“Huh?”

“Doesn’t Noona hate being bothered the most? Don’t earrings bother you?”

“Uh… … .”

Only then did Ji-eun realize her own mistake.

She realized that she had not come prepared to answer this question.

“I know those earrings. It was selling it at the ‘UST’ store I went to yesterday. Was there a cartoon about a girl collecting lost cards when we were young? It’s a collaboration with that anime girl.”

“Oh, I see… … Then this purple flower is probably a cherry blossom?”

“Hmm. But Yoon-woo said that they wouldn’t suit me.”

“Uh… … he said like that…”

“It’s like that. And, when I turned around, Yoon-woo said that these would look better on me, the one without decorations, than that.”

“What… … That’s right. What you’re wearing right now suits you really well and it’s pretty.”

“Thanks. And, that earring suits you much better than me… … .”

“Well, it wouldn’t… … .”

“So, how did you end up wearing it?”

“… … .”

‘I’m ruined. What should I do? Why didn’t I prepare for this situation?’

‘I just don’t feel good for dinner, so… … .’ If I run away with an excuse like that, I must think of an excuse by the end of the night.

To say that I just liked it and bought it by passing it, it would not be possible to explain like that with an attitude I have shown, where I have only focused on convenience to Hye-rim and others.

You suddenly want to buy some earrings, so you happened to stop by the store Yoon-woo and Hye-rim went to yesterday, and accidentally bought the earrings Yoon-woo was looking at.

There is no such coincidence in the world.

Hye-rim won’t believe it.

So, in this situation, how on earth do I give Hye-rim a convincing explanation?

I can’t tell the whole truth.

To tell all the truth, I will have to tell her about the inferiority that I usually had when staying with her, how I was hurt and made a riot by myself at Yoon-woo’s passing words, and even about lying on Yoon-woo’s bed when I opened my eyes.

But I couldn’t lie either.

Since I had Yoon-woo sleeping in my house last time, Hye-rim is sensitive to my lies.

There was also the problem that I arrived at Hye-rim’s house an hour earlier than Yoon-woo.

If she tells a lie right now, she wouldn’t have time to talk to Yoon-woo later.

In the midst of such thoughts, Hye-rim stared at Ji-eun’s face and waited for her words.

If it wasn’t because of the mood for dinner, she seemed to be looking into Ji-eun’s ears.

First of all, Ji-eun thought that she should buy time with words that are neither truth nor lies.

“That… As for why I suddenly put on earrings… … Oh, I still have my ears pierced when I was in high school. I used to wear earrings for a while, but I didn’t do it because it was annoying…I just got this as a gift from someone…”

“From Yoon-woo?”

“Uh… … .”

” It was a gift from Yoon-woo, right?”

“… … Huh?”

‘Oh, how do you know that… … . Seriously, was it too obvious?’

Ji-eun couldn’t make eye contact with Hye-rim, so she looked at the ground and answered in a crawling voice.

I remembered Hye-rim, who was interrogating me, when I was lying in my bed with Yoon-woo.

When Hye-rim gets angry, it’s really scary…

Should I deal with it alone?

My heart trembled at such worry. However, Hye-rim’s reaction to her was unexpected.

“I see. That’s good.”

“Uh? Is it the end?”

“Then, what more can I do?”

“That…Still, something like “why Yoon-woo suddenly gave you such a gift”… I thought you’d ask something like that… … .”

“Yoon-woo wanted to give it to you, so it must have been a present.”

“Uh? Well…”

“No?”

“It’s not that… It’s just a little bit vague to say that’s right…Actually, that happened…”

“It’s already done. I’m okay. You don’t have to explain it.”

“Uh…Still, something…”

“Anyway, he gave noona such a gift because he thought it would suit you well, right? I watched for a while since Yoon-woo watched it for a few minutes too.”

“Really?”

“Hmm. It really suits noona. I wish you would keep wearing it in the future. I’m sure other people will say you’re pretty.”

“Is that so?”

“Of course.”

“Excuse me…Hey, I’m going to buy some clothes, and it isn’t like I can wear jumpers every day….”

“Are you thinking about that now? That is great! Then, would you like to go look for clothes together on the weekend?”

“My clothes are difficult to find in size, so shopping will take a long time…”

“Hey, what’s the matter with taking so long? I’ve always wanted to go shopping with noona.”

“Then… Shall we? Uh…”

Contrary to Ji-eun’s worries, Hye-rim was very calm even when she knew that Yoon-woo had given her earrings.

Even when Yoon-woo came to Hye-rim’s house at 6 o’clock, she said, ‘Yoon-woo, you said this was a gift? Doesn’t it go really well with noona’s appearance?’ she asked, but she hasn’t talked about the earrings anymore since then.

She was the same as her usual appearance until she ate and parted with Ji-eun and Yoon-woo.

In fact, Hye-rim was thinking she wanted Yoon-woo and Jieun to get out of her room as soon as possible.

She didn’t want to see their faces.

In this space, she seemed to be the only one, alone.

Ji-eun smiles at Yoon-woo, and Yoon-woo’s soft expression praising Ji-eun…

Even though this was her own room, it felt like a space where she shouldn’t be.

After Ji-eun and Yoon-woo left the house, Hye-rim immediately collapsed on the bed.

She then thought that for a while before starting helplessly at the ceiling.

‘Even though he doesn’t have any debt to Ji-eun, he just wants to give a present…’

‘This wasn’t the earrings that Yoon-woo liked, and it wasn’t me that Yoon-woo wanted to give a present to…’

Hye-rim felt like she was like a debtor to Yoon-woo.

It was Ji-eun who Yoon-woo’s true favor was directed to, and she was a usurer who intervened and forced him to offer his favor.

It was she who used her debt as an excuse to interfere with the love of others.

‘Maybe, eating rice…Are you forcing yourself to eat with me? Come to think of it, Yoon-woo was a little unclear back then…’

‘Should I just quit? Like this…’

‘Isn’t it difficult? Now I’m tired of this diet…Then, does Yoon-woo want to eat with Ji-eun every day? Actually, maybe he doesn’t want to meet me…’

‘If it was me, not Ji-eun, who asked to eat lamb skewers… Could something like that happen to me?’

‘Let’s not think about anything like that, wouldn’t he have refused from the beginning?’

‘If you think about it, it was a failure from the beginning. It seems that Yoon-woo didn’t like the snack I chose, but I was still reckless…’

‘What the hell have I been doing?’

Perhaps, Yoon-woo wants to eat with Ji-eun alone.

Maybe Ji-eun and Yoon-woo want to be alone.

Could it be that she is hovering around the two of them and interfering with them without notice?

I thought so.

However, her relationship with Yoon-woo and her relationship with Ji-eun were also quite sorrowful in this situation that she couldn’t hold back tears just by imagining it.

In Hye-rim’s life, there were only two people who were valuable.

However, whether Hye-rim herself is valuable to the two is another matter.

Without them, Hye-rim’s life might be thrown into a cage crowded with animals again.

A life where you have to deal with all kinds of beasts that try to scratch and bite her all alone.

Such a sad life when you can’t find a single person to comfort this tired, lonely and sorrowful heart…

Hye-rim habitually took out her cell phone.

She wanted to have a conversation, calling anyone.

But today there was no one to call.

So Hye-rim connected her cell phone to the charger, put it down on her floor, fell on her bed, and buried her face in the pillow. 

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