Chapter 129 - What's on Luke's mind - Part 4

Am I dreaming? 

I've been sitting on the bathroom floor for the past ten minutes, with my hand on my cheek where her lips had landed. I was in a daze, and my mind was filled with the memory of her voice. My wolf, she said. 

I raked my fingers through my hair, smiling ear to ear as I recalled the way she called me before. Strangely, I really hated it when Maggie called me 'wolf.' But hearing Violet call me as such made me feel happy—giddy, even. I suppose it was because she didn't only call me wolf, but MY wolf. 

I stood up, walking to see my reflection in the mirror. So this was the kind of expression I had right now. The man there was still as handsome as ever, but the smile made him look a bit like a fool. His cheeks were unusually flushed, and the corner of his lips couldn't seem to go down. Andrew would have a year's worth of teasing if he saw my expression right now.

It was very rare for my cheeks to flush, but maybe it's becoming more common as Violet began to open up to me more frequently. To think that she could make me have such an expression with only two words from her. 

"My wolf," I repeated, hand clutching my ċhėst. Is this what it was like to have a pet name?

Back when I hadn't met her, I used to hear about people bragging about the little things they did with their mates. They went on and on about how wonderful it was to have met their mate, almost as if they wanted me to be envious of them. But now I know that that wasn't the case at all. Because even the smallest thing we do with our mate could bring us the greatest joy—and Violet has proven it true. 

Wolfie has been urging me to let him take control since before, but God knows what will happen should I allow him to be out on the surface. I'm sure he would be all over Violet. 

[Mark her! Mark her!]

Wolfie paced around, his tail wagging excitedly with the same smile sprawled across his face. Obviously, we were both very smitten with our mate. 

[Not now] I replied. If I mark her now, everything I'm feeling will be doubled, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to hold myself together. I didn't want to mark her until she was completely comfortable with my touch. I didn't want to force my feelings on her when she was not ready for it. 

Truthfully, I have waited a very long time. Other werewolves usually mark their mates the moment they find each other, and then they'll complete the bond when they feel ready. It has been months since we first met and yet, I still haven't marked her. It was fortunate that no other werewolves, mostly the elderly—or should I say, Emma, asked about this matter. 

Emma was my mother's friend, and she had been filling in for her since my mother's passing. I was grateful to her, but she could be a little too curious at times. I couldn't even count the number of times she asked me about finding my mate before I found Violet. 

Every time a pack found their new Luna, a Luna ceremony would be held to commemorate her ascension. It was a ceremony in which the Luna would receive the people's blessing, indicating their willingness to be led by the new Luna. It was also a ceremony to mark the beginning of Luna's reign alongside the Alpha of the pack.

[But it's mating season soon] Wolfie whɨnėd, clearly unhappy with my answer. 

Right, mating season—the worst season to ever happen to werewolves who haven't met their mates. Mated werewolves will become overly chummy with each other, displaying their affection for each other in almost every place possible. Females go into heat, and males become even more protective of their mates. While unmated ones... they go crazy. 

Much to say, a lot of unintentional accidents happen around this time. That's why it was safer for unmated males and females not to meet each other during this period—should they wish to keep their chastity for their mates. 

Will I be able to make it through the mating season? I had no problems during the previous mating seasons because I always kept myself busy with work, but now that I've met my mate, I'm not so sure. If I didn't mark her, other males might want to try their luck with her—just to satisfy their dėsɨrės—but if I mark her, I'm not sure I'll be able to keep myself at bay. Both options were equally dangerous for her, but the latter was clearly the better option.

If she bears the mark of the Alpha, no one will dare to try to do anything to her. The scent that came from the mark will be enough to drive other males away, keeping her safe from other werewolves. Should the danger come from a human male, perhaps a beating would be appropriate to keep them away. I'm not letting anyone near my mate. 

[We should mark her before then, right?] 

Wolfie nodded, jumping around and wagging his tail excitedly. The idea of finally marking her as mine seemed so perfect, knowing that she was completely mine and only mine. I belonged to her, and she belonged to me. 

[And then we should make pups!!] He exclaimed, and I choked. 

[I-isn't it a little too early for that?] 

I was only thinking about forming the bond during the mating season, not about completing the bond. I'm not sure if we're ready for that. While I do act quite boldly with Violet, this was also my first experience with this type of relationship. I... I needed some time to better prepare and educate myself. I'd want to touch her, but that's all there is to it.

Besides, I don't think Violet is any more prepared than I am. We were still in the process of getting to know each other and becoming more comfortable in each other's company, so I don't think we should rush things. After all, we have all the time in the world to be with each other—should I survive this poison inside me. 

Didn't I just promise to be by her side until the end of her time? How am I supposed to tell her that I've been poisoned and that if we don't find an antidote, I'll die in a week? I have no plans to leave anytime soon, but no one knows what the future holds. All we could do was hope that things would turn out for the better.

I took off my clothes and prepared for my long overdue bath, finally getting my mind off Violet. My thoughts had always been so preoccupied with her that she had almost become a part of them. This made me wonder how hard and how deeply I had fallen for her.

I was born to love her, or rather, the mate bond made me love her. It was not my choice to fall in love with her, it was my destiny. Though my feelings for her blossomed initially as a result of the mate bond, my feelings for her grew stronger as I spent more time with her. It was hard not to love someone as lovely as her. 

Sometimes during the day, a question would occasionally pop into my head. If I was human, would I still love her the way I do now? I would die for her, do anything for her just to make her happy. But will I feel the same without the mate bond? I didn't know the answer. 

Obviously, I'd say that I'd love her the same. But how am I to prove it? The mate bond made me feel attracted to her, made me develop certain feelings and connections to her that I certainly don't have for any other woman. But here's what's certain. 

I won't be able to live without her.

She'd become such a big part of my life that the void she'd left behind would be impossible to fill. My eyes would look for her the moment she was out of sight, my mind would run to her at every given opportunity, and my heart would yearn for her with each passing day. It was simply impossible for me to live a life without her. 

It felt good to know that she couldn't imagine her life without me because that's exactly how I feel about her.

[That's why you should hurry and mark her!!] Someone must be growing impatient.