Chapter 3 - My Ex-Lover’s Excuse

Haizens made a sorrowful expression as he spoke with a sweet, pitiful voice.

‘Latille, I know you’re furious, but please don’t be so harsh. If you get angry the moment we unite, I will-‘

‘Four minutes left.’

Latille cut him off while he was speaking. His voice was as lovely as the memories of the past, listening to it was nice when one desired to listen to pleasant music. However, even if Haizens sang a beautiful song, it would be easy to get annoyed.

‘Three minutes and thirty seconds.’

‘…’

Haizens sighed with a resigned expression as Latille firmly announced the remaining duration of their time.

‘Okay, I’ll tell you everything. The rebellion led by the Heum forces were stronger than I had expected. The Duke of Daga supported them.’

‘The Duke of Daga?’

Where did I hear this familiar name? You’ve seen the name family name on the wedding invitation, haven’t you? Aini Tour de la Daga. Yes, I definitely recall seeing that name on the invitation. It’s the name of the woman who is marrying Haizens. The bride-to-be’s family supported Prince Heum?

‘I needed the Duke’s power to suppress Prince Heum, so I tried to curry his favour. He asked that I make his only daughter, Aini Tour de la Daga Empress.’

‘…’

Latille kept silent as she examined Haizens’ expressions; he looked miserable. The countless, rich expressions that she had always admired leaned towards sadness this time.

‘Latille.’

Haizens stepped forward and embraced her. The warmth was no different than it was before, only sadder.

‘I seek your forgiveness, I’m sorry.’

‘… Pay no mind, don’t be. It’s only natural you would choose yourself over me. I always knew your pride preceded our love, so I won’t blame you for this. Anyone would put themselves first over others.’

Haizens gazed at Latille with shaking eyes; it seems that her blunt speech got to him. She fiercely stomped on his foot while he was distracted.

‘Ow.’

Haizens yelped in pain and quickly scrambled his feet away. Latille glanced at him feeling a little regretful. In times like these, you need heels. It is quite a pity I wore comfortable shoes for the trip; I should have changed at the door!

‘Don’t start feeling moved. Just because I don’t blame you, it doesn’t mean I’m not angry. It’s your business, so I don’t care.’

Haizens looked at her in distress.

‘Latille… please don’t talk like this.’

His spoke desperately. Latille’s voice and expression remained cold, so it pained him.

‘Don’t talk like this? I don’t want to hear it. What was I supposed to do in this situation? You couldn’t even write once because you were at war, so don’t bother making excuses. You could have told me after the war. Why do I have to receive news of your wedding through an envoy?’

‘Latille, we still don’t know who else is on Prince Heum’s side. We may have won, but we’re still in an unstable position.’

‘!’

‘And so is the duke. I don’t know anything else, but he won’t let me betray his daughter. I still don’t know who the spy is, so that’s why I couldn’t write a letter.’

‘We’re going to part ways, so why do you even bother with telling me? If a spy finds out, wouldn’t it help Prince Heum’s supporters?’

‘…’

‘What about the Duke?’*

Haizens looked at Latille with sorrowful eyes.

No matter what you say, I love you.

Latille pushed him away.

I liked his familiar scent and his soft skin, but this is the end. Now he’s just this kind of person, someone who pushes others aside. Fortunately, it didn’t seem she was crying. Latille repeatedly clenched and unclenched her fists.

‘Yes, I knew that you were just going to spout a bunch of excuses… I’m going. Don’t believe me when I tell you to live well even as the delegation leader because they’re just empty words with no meaning.’

Latille turned back on her tracks and began to walk away until Haizens grabbed her by the wrist.

‘Latille, please… don’t utter such painful words in my presence. I didn’t summon you to part ways.’

‘Well then, to apologise?’

‘I love you.’

What is this guy saying now?

Her eyes widened at Haizens’ desperate declaration of love.

‘Love?’

‘Latille, you’re the only one I love, so five years; please wait for me for five years.’

‘What?’

Latille looked at him with a false smile.

‘Will things change if I wait for five years?’

I asked him sarcastically, but Haizens firmly agreed.

‘In five years, we can beat the Duke and get rid of the rest of Heum’s supporters then I can pave a solid road to achieving my goal of establishing a complete monarchy.’

But that firm oath still failed to change Latille’s mind; she only retorted snarkily.

‘Then what? What exactly do I even gain from waiting for five years? Now that there’s an ongoing struggle for the throne, you’ll have to be strategically selecting concubines to lay the groundwork, so how will I benefit from this?

‘I will never bed a concubine, and if you want, that’ll apply to Aini as well. If you want, I can even swear an oath in the holy temple. Forget sleeping with them, I won’t even touch their fingertips. Then five years later, I’ll figure it out.’

This time, Latille was a little shaken. She couldn’t answer right away and simply looked at him. Swearing an oath at the holy temple is something to be taken seriously since one can be punished for swearing false oaths. God hates lying.

‘For now, he’s not lying.’

Even then, there were many things he said that didn’t make sense. Latille sighed as she pointed them all out one by one.

‘Forget the concubines, what about divorcing the empress?’ Duke Daga is said to have great power, so if they become the family that has raised the empress, their power will become even greater. Would such a family be willing to sweep everything under the rug just because you deposed her after five years? Would she be weak enough to be easily pushed off the empress’ seat?’

But this time, Haizens answered firmly once more.

‘Enough.’

‘Is it pride or conceit?’

‘Latille, please. You’re the only one in my heart, the only one I’d ever want to be with in the future. I want us both to start a family, you know?’

Stupidly, Latille couldn’t answer him straight away. It was hard to resist the cries of the man you once loved.

How long have I spent praying for this man? This guy has only loved himself.

‘… No.’

She simply could not accept Haizens’ words.

‘Latille.’

Haizens looked at Latille with an unanticipated expression, one with eyes full of shock.

‘If it’s because you don’t trust me, I understand, so I’ll swear an oath at the holy temple. I’m begging you, so please…’

‘Should I be honest? I still love you, too but after five years, you would be another woman’s man. Now that Aini Tour de la Daga has come between the two of us, we’re both strangers now.’

‘I’ll never love her.’

‘Even if you don’t, she’s your bride, and I’m just the Queen of the neighbouring country. If you want to part ways, do it now before you get married. Are you really going to throw away five years of your married life to wait for me? Do you think I’m happy to hear that?’

Latille spoke resolutely and turned away. She knew this was the correct course of action. While she did hate his bride-to-be, she hated her position and not her existence in itself. Although she easily snatched the man she loved, Aini didn’t take him with bad intentions. She didn’t agree to be deposed in five years either. Haizens made agreed to marry her to become emperor; if he hadn’t done that, he would have died.

‘Latille, please!’

Tears streamed down Haizens’ beautiful face as he sank to his knees. Latille, who saw it, broke his heart.

‘Latille, you know it. Even if you refuse to accept me, I can’t love anyone else, please…’

Latille shook her head and left.

♔♔♔

‘My lady, are you alright?’

The commander of the Guards asked cautiously as Latille returned to her quarters and stared blankly out of the window.

‘No…’

She answered helplessly as she rested her forehead on the window frame like a sick chick.

The window frame feels cool, but my mind is in turmoil. I felt better when I was in a state of pure anger; it’s even harder now with all the complex thoughts and feelings. Moreover, Haizens’ words keep repeating over and over in my mind and each time, I have the urge to say ‘why is it that there’s something wrong each time?’ I was aware that Aini didn’t take him away with bad intentions. If the duke hadn’t revolted in the first place, then they wouldn’t have had made such a deal in the first place.

‘No, but not in five years…’

‘Yes?’

‘There’s something like that.’

Latille raised her heard with a groan and took off her cumbersome gloves that she had still been wearing. It turned out that she didn’t change her shoes nor her cloak.

I went out of my mind and wore my travel clothes to meet with Haizens.

‘Shall I summon a maid to help change your clothes?’

‘Yes, please.’

The commander of the Guards Knights left the room while uttering, ‘Wait a minute.’ However, less than a minute later, he immediately came back and called Latille.

‘That was fast. What’s wrong? Is there anyone there?’

As Latille asked, she recalled his face full of embarrassment. It didn’t seem like it was simply a matter of not seeing the maid. What else? Latille’s expression darkened.

‘Why?’

‘Lady Aini is at the door. ‘I want to see the queen’ she says, what shall I do?’

Aini Tour de la Daga, my ex-lover’s bride-to-be? Why does she want to meet me?

Latille frowned.

I’m already upset about Haizens. Do I really have to see her? I don’t really feel like it.

The commander of the Guards who noticed her gestures decided to make a suggestion.

‘If my lady desires it, I will see her in your stead.’

It was a tempting offer, but Latille declined.

‘It’s alright. Since I’m here as the delegation leader, I can’t avoid her, anyway. Tell her to come in.’

He seemed to be a little reluctant, but he obediently replied, ‘Yes’, then went outside. After a while, a young woman with elegant red her came into the room. Latille felt a little annoyed at the fact that her ex-lover’s prospective bride looked much more attractive than she had initially expected. Aini strode towards her gracefully; although she was a little short, her posture was sophisticated and her expression was firm. She gave off the feeling of a well-educated young lady.

‘Fuck it.’

Latille clicked her tongue.

‘My apologies, I haven’t changed yet.’

Latille wore a colourful uniform that resembled the knights’ instead of a dress. They were decorated with gold silk embroidery and a luxurious, golden cloak, so it was a gorgeous outfit. Thanks to Haizens, her clothes were wrinkled and her bottoms were stained with dirt.

I should have told her to come later, thought Latille regretfully, but she couldn’t tell her to go back. She concealed her thoughts, smiled and reached her hand out towards her.

‘Nice to meet you, Lady Aini.’

Translator’s note*: Was stuck on that phrase.

Also… we stan a strong female lead that knows what’s best for her! Go kick ass, baby!