Chapter 112 - October 10

"What happened Cameron?" I asked again more concerned, I had never seen him this clingy and quiet before. Since he departed from the hug he only sat down whit his head leaned on his hands.

He took a deep breath and finally lifted his head and his gaze met mine for some fractions of seconds in which I caught a glimpse of how wrecked he was.

I could perceive the pain through his gaze, from the way he moved, slowly and frenetic at the same time.

"I couldn't sleep." He said finally when the silence was too loud to ache in the bottom of my soul.

"Can you sleep with me?" He asked, his voice penetrating internally in my bones. 

I nodded and he gave me some clothes to wear to go to sleep.

We lay on the bed, facing opposite directions afar from each other. Yet I never felt him closer than he was at that moment.

Because he decided to share his pain with me, whatever the pain was or whatever was the reason that caused it.

He didn't fall asleep, I could feel he was awake from the way his breath sounded, short-breathed. When he slept he never had that peace breathing.

I couldn't sleep either, hanging there waiting for him in case he needed something or he wanted to open up with me.

When it was early morning he turned around and climbed closer to me, his hands wrapped around my grip and he hugged me from behind. 

"Thanks for not asking me anything even if you were awake." He whispered kissing my cheek and then climbing at the edge of the bed to slowly get up.

He lost his balance on his way up and almost fell probably still affected by the alcohol hangover.

Then he walked to the kitchen losing his balance every few steps but then finding his way back in a standing position only to scoff and start walking again. He seemed so shattered by whatever happened to him that my heart sank at the sight of him being broken.

The maid also had a sad look gazing at him walk into the kitchen and clung onto the chair for support as he slowly sat down.

I barely recognized him in that dark area that immersed him.

I looked at her confused, begging for some sort of explanation or at least a reassurance he would be fine. She didn't tell me anything nor did she reassured me. She poured a cup of coffee to him and then gestured to me to follow her.

When she walked far enough not to be heard from him, she finally spoke, "it's the date, October 10. I forgot to advise you..." 

"Lily." His voice called before the maid could continue.

I hastily reached the table, to hear what he wanted from me.

"Sit." He ordered in a low whisper.

I did what he asked, and when I sat down he covered his face with his shaky hands. Not a single tear wettened his face but I could say he was holding them back from the creak in his voice.

"I want you to go back home and forget what you saw." He said, slightly raising his voice to his usual tone of voice.

"I am not going to leave..." I whispered back shaking my head. If he thought I would leave him alone and in that condition then he was definitely wrong.

He took my hand and squeezed it, "please." He begged.

I swallowed down hesitating.

"Please." He said again. This time his voice was at the edge of crying.

He took a brief pause, then he swallowed down loudly. I could feel the noise of his dry lips unsticking, "I don't want you to see me like this anymore. Go."

I stood up and took a deep breath, waiting for him to stop me or change his mind but he seemed too desperate to even open his eyes and see I was staring at him. I turned around and gazed at the maid, who nodded.

I took a few steps forward to the door and when my hand touched the handle of the door he lifted his head. 

"Lily." His eyes still shut his hands not freeing his forehead.

"I love you too." 

I smiled as my hand began to shake hearing what I wanted to hear since the first time our souls met. I let my hand grip over the door handle and pulled it open, when the door dodged I felt my happiness release and my stomach knot emotionally.

He loved me.

He loved me!

I walked back in my car and drove back home, so many questions crossing in my mind.

Why did he decide to tell me now? Why did he want me to leave? Was he alright? And so many more yet the turbulence in my stomach was due to the fight of opposite emotions fighting. I was both happy since he told me the famous three words I always wanted to hear but at the same time, I was sad and concerned about his health condition.

I stopped by a coffee shop to grab two cups and bring them home.

10 October, that date didn't ring any bell to me but to be the cause of Cameron's withdrawal then it must be something.

I took an inner breath as I waited for the girl to prepare my cups. I told her to keep the charge and then walked back into my car.

I reached home and waited for Joanna to wake up as I began to drink the coffee and thought about Cameron. I hope he will be better tomorrow but if our relationship will last then I have to remember not to bother him anymore on that date: October 10.

How can a date so apparently innocuous have such a strong effect on him and shatter him that much? I wish he will tell me one day what happened to him.