Chapter 10 - Drastic Resolution

I found myself hanging on the top of my chair waiting for his answer. He looked at me for some seconds, to prove me he wasn't scared if people would notice he paid a special attention for me. Then he gazed back to Mark, the one who made the question and flashened him with his shining white toothy smile.

"Yes, that girl intrigued me and I can say it's not easy at all to impress me nor to catch my attention." I unconsciously smiled at his reply and as soon as I noticed and suffocated the smile I caught both Carl and Cameron staring at me.

We finally walked out of the restaurant as the first couple to leave and as soon as the exit door of the restaurant closed behind us I scoffed noisily, "why are you following me?"

Carl kept knitting his eyebrows down and I wondered what did I do wrong at that moment to deserve such a glower.

"I see the way you look at Cameron." His voice rang suspicious and frustrated but I was pleased to hear I made him feel like I felt in front of his blonde petite lover.

Carl frowned his forehead, his eyes slightly narrowed as he usually did when he was nervous about something and I cleared my voice to compose myself.

The dinner was over about one hour and a half later, Carl remained near me all the time, and even when I stood up to leave he followed me right after. I knew from the way Cameron couldn't flinch his gaze away from me that he was looking forward to talking to me just as much as I was but Carl's presence didn't allow him to make a move.

"You probably know his fame and his name, we didn't even broke up and you are already looking to other men!" He spat, I managed to remain calm even if the anger in my body was at the peak of driving me to lose my temper in front of everyone.

"Just like you cheated on me when we were still dating." I said more calmly then I expected, he seemed surprised too for the low tone of voice which didn't match the furious expression on my face.

"Now I want to go back home and I'd be glad not to see you anymore." I said, slightly raising my voice to make that suggestion sound more like a threat.

"Are you..." his voice broke, he couldn't hold my gaze probably because he knew if he looked at me straightly in my eyes once again he would fall into tears.

"Are you breaking up with me?" He finally asked, as if it wasn't obvious, he looked me in a pleading gaze like a puppy begging for food.

"Yes, I need someone who deserves me." I said, althought I truly believed the words that came out of my mouth it was still so painful to close that chapter. I spent six years with him, he was the longest and most meaningful relationship I ever had and I would lie to myself if I said that one big part of my heart wasn't still clinging to the hope and wish he would change and maybe try to fix the situation.

A long exctruciating defeaning silence fell between us, he sighed deeply waiting for me to change my mind as I held my breath waiting for him to say the right thing for once in his life.

But he didn't. Probably there weren't many things to say under such drastic circumstances but I guessed an 'I love you' or the simple basic useless phrase, 'I am sorry I will do my best to fix things.' would still be better than remaining silent.

He finally opened his mouth, my heart raced waiting for his apologize, at least I deserved to hear him beg me for forgiveness.

"Are you sure?" three only words came out of his mouth and I realized he even managed to pick the wrong three words to use.

Maybe he wasn't the right man for me, but if he wasn't then I wondered why the fate let me to waste six long years with him if we weren't supposed to be.

I nodded, "I am sure. Have a good life, Carl." I said, turning around and walking to my car.

I heard him calling my names a few times and running beside me to reach me but I didn't change my mind and I slammed the door of the car closed.

I couldn't believe that mysterious wealth man was none other than my boyfriend's boss, how many chances were there?

I started my car and drove to my house, I left the car in my garage and walked through the door.

As soon as I walked in, the loneliness of the house stabbed me in my chest stronger than a knife ever could, a house so big wich suddenly looked so empty without Carl there.

Few of his clothes were still on the edge of the sofa or the back of the chair, his objects and the things he gave me filled the corners of the house and rested here and there to give color to the house.

I moved into that house when we were already together so every meter of it reminded me of him, bringing back memories both positive and negative that occurred to my mind and transfix my heart as darts hitting the target.

A tight grip over my heart and my breath shortened.

I believed in future and in love for us and he cheated on me with a tall blonde girl who dared to look down on me and be proud to be the lover.

I hated myself for having loved such a despicable man but I loathed myself even more for hoping he would still come back because the idea of throwing it all away and starting over once again was scaring her to death.