3 Chapter 3

Her quiet, even voicestopped. Therehad been atoneof cold sincerity in itthatShinocould nothelp butrecognise. Shemeanteverything thatshesaid. Shesaid no morethan the truth. Her reputation for completeindifferenceto admiration and her unvarying attitudetowardsmen wereaswellknown asher boldcourageand firmdetermination. With Sir Kiba Inuzuka shebehaved likeayounger brother, and as such entertained hisfriends. Shewaspopular with everybody, even with themothersof marriageabledaughters, for, in spite of her wealth and beauty, her notoriouscharacteristicsmadeher insignificantasarivalto plainer and lesswell-dowered girls.

Shinosatin silence. Itwashardly likely, hethought bitterly, thatheshould succeed whereother and better men had failed. Hehad been afoolto succumb to thetemptation thathad been too hard for himto resist. Heknewher well enough to knowbeforehand whather answer would be. The very realfear for her safety thatthethoughtof thecoming expedition gavehim, her nearnessin thedeepening night, thecozy garden, themusic... allthis had combined to make him say those words thathe, in anormal moment, would never dare say. Heloved her, hewould loveher always, buthe knewthathislovewasashopelessasitwasundying. Butit wasmen who weremen whomshewanted for her friends, so hemusttakehismedicinelikeaman.

"May I stillbethefriend, Hana?"hesaid quietly.

Shelooked athimamoment, butin thedimlightof the hanging lanternshiseyesweresteady under hers, and she held outher hand frankly. "Gladly,"shesaid straightaway. "I have numerousof acquaintances, butvery fewfriends. Wearealways travelling, Kiba and I, and wenever seemto havetimeto makefriends. Werarely stay aslong in oneplaceaswehave stayed in Iwagakure (Earth Country's capital). In Fire Country, they callusvery bad neighbours, weareso seldomthere. Wegenerally go homefor three monthsin thewinter for thehunting, buttherestof theyear wewander on thefaceof theglobe."

Heheld her slender fingersgripped in hisfor amoment, suppressing an insanedesireto pressthemto hislips, which heknewwould befatalto thenewly reconciled friendship, and then letthemgo. MissInuzuka continued sitting quietly beside him. Shewasin no way disturbed by whathad happened. She had taken himliterally athisword, and wastreating himas thefriendhehad asked to be. It did not occur to her that the man beside him is struggling to keep himself unfussed of the rejection he just had. Shewas totally unblushing and at ease. And asthey satsilent, her thoughtsfar away in thedesert, and suddenly a man's low voice rose in the stillness of the night, fullof vain longingsand regrets.

"Take the path of regret

Try to find where to place the blame

Trace back all that I've said

Where are you? I miss you..."

He sang in apassionate, vibrating baritone. Hewassinging in Konoha, and yetthealmostindefiniteslurring fromnoteto notewas strangely un-Konoha. HanaInuzuka leaned forward, her head raised, listening intently, with shining eyes. Thevoiceseemed to comefromthedark shadowsattheend of thegarden, or it mighthavebeen further away outin theroad beyond the cactushedge. Thesinger sang slowly, hisvoicelingering gently on thewords;thelastversedying away softly and clearly, gradually fading into silence.

For amomenttherewasutter stillness, then Hanalay back with alittlesigh. "TheHakuSong: Sadness and Sorrow. Itmakesmethink of Water Country. I heard aman sing itin Yugakure (Water Country's capital)lastyear, butnotlike that. Whatawonderfulvoice! I wonder who itis?"

Shinolooked ather curiously, surprised atthesudden ring of interestin her tone, and thesudden animation of her face.

"You say you haveno emotion in your nature, and yetthat unknown man'ssinging hasstirred you deeply. Howdo you reconcilethetwo?"heasked, almostangrily.

"Isan appreciation of thebeautifulemotion?"shechallenged, with uplifted eyes. "Surely not. Music, art, nature, everything beautifulappealsto me. Butthereisnothing emotionalin that. Itisonly thatI prefer beautifulthingsto ugly ones. For thatreason even pretty clothesappealto me,"sheadded, laughing.

"You arethebest-dressed woman in Earth Country,"heagreed. "Butisnotthatan admission to thewomanly feelingsthatyou despise?"

"Notatall. To takean interestin one'sclothesisnotan exclusively femininevice. I likepretty dresses. I admitto spending sometimein thinking of colour schemesto go with my horriblehair, butI assureyou thatmy dressmaker hasan easier lifethan Kiba'stailor."

Shesatsilent, hoping thatthesinger mightnothavegone, but therewasno sound exceptacicadachirping near her. She swung round in her chair, looking in thedirection fromwhich itcame. "Listen to it," while listening intently with a genuine smile. "Jolly littlebeauties! They werethefirst thingsI listen for when I first came here. I say, without it, this is no West Continent."

"Maddening littlebeasts!"said Shinoirritably.

"They aregoing to bevery friendly littlebeaststo meduring thenextfour weeks…. You don'tknowwhatthistrip means to me. I likewild places. Thehappiesttimesof my lifehave been spentcamping in Lightning Countryand Water Country, and I havealways wanted thedesertmorethan either of them. Itisgoing to bea month pureof joy. I amgoing to beenormously happy."

Shestood up with alittlelaugh of intensepleasure, and half turned, waiting for Shino. Hegotup reluctantly and stood silentbesideher for afewmoments. "Hana, I wish you'd letmekissyou, justonce,"hebrokeoutmiserably.

Shelooked up swiftly with aglintof anger in her eyes, and shook her head. "No. That'snotwhat we agreed about. I havenever been kissed in my life. Itisoneof thethingsthatI do not understand."Her voicewasalmostfierce.

Shemoved leisurely towardstheinn, and hepaced beside her wondering if hehad forfeited her friendship by his outburst, buton theverandah shehalted and spokein the frank toneof camaraderiein which shehad alwaysaddressed him. "ShallI seeyou in themorning?"

Heunderstood. Therewasto beno morereferenceto what had passed between them. Theoffer of friendship held, but only on her own terms. Hepulled himself together.

"Yes. Wehavearranged an escortof aboutadozen of usto ridethefirstfewmileswith you, to giveyou aproper sendoff."

Shemadealaughing gestureof protest. "Itwillcertainly need four weeksof solitudeto counteracttheanimosity I stirred,"shesaid lightly, asshepassed into theballroom.