53 What Is Black and What Is White?

After what felt like a lifetime the pain had finally receded but the damage was already done. I weakly looked over at the burnt grass and ash that surrounded Kibbles and I. If we were sitting in the carriage, Ki and Ren would have died.

My eyes briefly looked over at Ki and Ren who wore shocked expressions on their faces before I looked at the small Kithun in my arms. He looked back at me before snuggling into my shoulder.

My clothes had been damaged by the fire that kibbles had created from his rank up but my skin was still as smooth as the day I was born.

I lifted up Kibbles with the utmost tenderness and care before I staggered back into the carriage with clumsy movements.

" Young Master are you okay?" Ren had said looking over me.

" Just drive the carriage. You should follow orders, right?" I said as acid dripped from each word.

" Enough Yuki! This isn't fair! " Ki replied angrily.

I looked down at the ground still holding Kibbles softly as if he could break apart any moment and stared at the pair.

" You could have told me? That's what friends do right?!" I replied.

" But young master our orders were to.." Ki spoke.

I cut her off completely and looked over to her " Orders huh? Are they more important than telling your friend that their mother had died before an emperor could tell them like they were listing their chores for the week?" I said self-deprecatingly.

" I was stupid enough to think of both you and Ren as my friends and then you SELL ME OFF TO THE EMPEROR? Without even a damn warning!?" Each word filled with grief.

" What do you mean Yuki? What exactly happened in there?" Ren said confused.

" You know exactly what happened. The marriage, the "new" position, right? You shouldn't start lying to me now… or wait you already hid things from me, it doesn't matter I guess when my Aikyo family name is all the matters to you right?" I started to laugh.

" Marriage?" Ren said as he held his hand over his face.

" Hahaha I guess grandfather doesn't tell his lackeys everything. The new emperor's decree is quite perfect for the empire. I am to be married as soon as I graduate and take over my father's position. It looks like the Tama doesn't even want to bury my mother or wait for my father to die before making me walk in their shoes!" I said each word sarcastically.

" I don't even like women, What the hell am I supposed to do marrying the princess, braid her damn hair!?" as soon as the words left my lips I realised I had mistakenly said the one thing I didn't want to say out loud.

" What did you just say?" Ren said shocked.

" Young Master?! Does that mean you.. you?" Ki said even more surprised.

" When did my feelings ever matter? Just drive the damn carriage like you were ordered to." I said without looking at either of them.

I hopped inside and closed the door with a bang, regret seemed to slip out of my pores like a flash flood in a desert.

" I don't want to see anyone right now, you Maid! Go sit in the front with my sword fighting instructor." I pointed at Ki and then at the front where Ren was driving.

"Yuki, it's going to be okay " Kibbles whispered in my brain weakly.

Ren and Ki seemingly shocked from everything I had said climbed in front without so much as a peep.

[ It's over... it's all over, I said I was going to live under the radar, now I'll probably be killed in a freak accident to stop the royal family from being shamed.]

I sat there as the carriage ebbed and flowed with the stone ridden ground and the clopping of spirit beast hooves. I swapped between sheer anger, embarrassment, numbness and sadness with each bump on the road. If there was a bridge nearby I probably would have jumped off it in order to make it all stop.

[ Who cares anyway...]

It was not like any of this mattered anymore.

[ Kibbles where do you think Riku is?]

" I don't know" Kibbles replied as he sat on my lap recovering.

[ Do you think he will take us in for a little while before we leave?]

" I have no idea, we could try! do you remember where he lives? Where do you want to leave to? I don't mind either way where we go, just better to have a plan." Kibbles yawned and spoke.

[ There are so many Kingdoms here, I guess we could just pick a direction after we save my father.]

" Yuki are we going to the border?" Kibbles responded to my statement.

[ mm that's why I need to get answers from my grandfather]

" And when we save him? " Kibbles questioned.

[ I will tell him... everything and then leave Tama Kingdom.]

[ I won't have to tangle with a male lead if I never meet him, right?]

[ I won't have to deal with that royal family if I never see them and father won't be disappointed in having a son who can't do what was ordered of him]

" Well, I will follow you anywhere Yuki so just say when. I am sleepy now, my body is sore, you should rest too Yuki!" Kibbles mentioned as he drifted off peacefully.

Meanwhile back at the palace, the three royal children were arguing.

*** Nathanial's point of View ***

"I can't believe that Yuki yelled at father like that, if you didn't say anything brother he could have been killed!" my sister said to my brother in a huff.

"His mother has passed due to someone's horrible deeds and his father is missing. I would be sad too if anything happened to any of you" Older Brother said in a sad tone.

I sat there thinking about everything that had happened, my began to heart sink.

"Do you think Yuki hates us now?" I said quietly in almost a whisper.

"Of course he doesn't hate us! we will be family one day!" my sister replied with a smile as she sipped her tea.

"He probably really hates all of us right now" My brother replied flatly after a moment.

My sisters face contorted and she slammed her tea on the table with a thunk. The maids around us all stood to attention as per usual ready to cater to her whims.

"What do you mean hates us? We haven't done anything wrong!" My sister replied without thinking as per usual.

"We have… Do you think he knew what happened to his mother before he walked in today?" Brother replied after a few moments.

"Of course he did! He was just angry that his mother is gone right?" my sister replied.

"The look on his face when father had told him said otherwise. Did you not see it?" My brother retorted as he picked up a biscuit.

"Nathan, you are quiet what do you think?" My sister said as I tried to shrink into my seat.

[ Don't get me involved between you two! ]

"It's okay if you don't want to say anything" my dependable big brother replied.

"I think big brother is right. Father can come across insensitive even when he means well, I think Yuki probably hates us. Remember that time when I couldn't recite principles of the flow of magic?" I said into my sleeve as I covered the embarrassment on my face.

"Oh yeah daddy made you sit in a corner for the night and read and copy the book 20 times over!" my sister said and giggled.

"He just didn't want you to fall behind," elder brother said.

"Mm he cared but I couldn't see it at the time," I responded still holding my sleeve.

"So you think he is doing all of this to protect Yuki?" brother responded.

I nodded quickly.

"If I were Yuki I would probably hate us," I said sadly.

"We should visit him tomorrow and clear things up!" My sister said and smiled.

"We can't… it is not the right time, give him some space to breathe first" Brother said finishing off another biscuit.

" But I want to see him now!" my sister whined.

[ I felt sorry for my sister in these times she didn't know how to read the mood at all ]

" If you see him now he will probably just yell at you," brother Leo said as he stood up.

" Why don't we write him a letter?" I suggested.

" Of course we can't! What if there are spies and someone reads it?!" said sister said in her usual know everything tone.

" Sorry Nathan, Rosli is right we can't the matter is too important" Leo looked at me and shook his head.

Leopold paced back and forward from his spot. Anyone who knew him would know he was thinking hard about the problem.

" We should go visit in a day or two when the heat dies down, maybe he will listen then. Should we bring a gift?" Leo recommended.

Leo and I both looked at our sister.

" Don't look at me, the only gift he needs is my company!" Rosli said smiling to herself satisfactorily.

" Wait does this mean none of us actually know what Yuki would like as a gift?" I said looking at my knees in guilt.

" I always used to bring him books and puzzles, I am sure he liked them!" Rosli said.

" Did you ever ask?" Leo replied.

" I umm.." Rosli said in thought.

We all looked at each other and in guilt.