Chapter 187 - Empty Without You

"What did you say?" Charles tried to brush the strange voices that kept disturbing him in his head. When his spy reported the same thing again, he thought he was inside a nightmare, and the voices were getting clearer and clearer in his head.

"His Highness Grand Duke was… m.a.k.i.n.g. .l.o.v.e with his servant on the top of the hill behind this palace. Your Highness Prince, give us an order, we will kill that servant as long as you wish for it."

"Did he take Aster's purity?"

"N—No, Your Highness. They didn't have any i.n.t.e.r.c.o.u.r.s.e, but they do… suck each other's manhood."

The aura inside the carriage got chilly instantly. There were three of his men kneeling in front of him, they shivered when their prince emanated this chilling aura. Usually, if the Crown Prince already emanated this aura, it was clear that someone or plenty of people would die today. 

"Your Highness, that servant and Grand Duke's guard, Irion was the one who ruined the party. Our men are chasing him right now, but… it seems it would take a while until we can subdue him."

"No, that's okay, I know Irion. At least without him, Aster didn't have anyone to guard him right now."

Charles started tapping his finger on the armrest and then laughed mirthlessly, "It seems my darling has forgotten about our promise, maybe that slave is influencing him greatly. That's why Aster hesitated to say yes."

The voices inside his head were getting clearer and clearer, but all of them conflicted with each other.

'Don't you love him? You should forgive him!'

'He loves you too, he is just confused!'

'Kill that slave! And then lock Aster inside his room forever!'

'Take his purity, own him completely! He is going to be taken if you are soft!'

Amongst all those contradicting voices, they had one statement that they all agreed on.

'Don't you feel empty without Aster?'

Charles smirked. His shadow guards already lowered their head, afraid of his anger. It was understandable, because Charles himself knew that he was indeed ruthless. But all his action was based on his best interest and Aster's.

Charles ordered in one word, "I will wait inside Aster's room, when he returns, make sure he returns to his room, make sure that his servant didn't bother us."

"Understood!" the shadow guards disappeared from the carriage. Charles chuckled with slight irony in his tone. Maybe he was laughing at his own foolishness, his own weakness.

"It's true that I feel empty without you, Aster. The world is a boring place, everything is too easy and bothersome, but with you… I feel wondrous joy, I feel… alive."

"You will be leaving nowhere without me."

***

Aster and Ramuja returned at midnight, they were inside the south garden right now. Aster had created a scenario when he faced the head butler, he will say that a man kidnapped him, but returned him back because he only needed money.

'It's a bit unreasonable but, I can't find any other way to reason.'

"Milord, I will return to my room, please rest well," Ramuja said. He smiled and kissed Aster's forehead, "T—Thank you for letting me…"

Aster chuckled, "You have to pay for your sin of touching a high aristocrat."

Ramuja took a step back, "I—I… this servant thought that it was… mutual…"

Aster's chuckle turned into laughter, "Of course, I'm just messing with you. Now go, you need rest."

Ramuja nodded and left his master. Aster hummed and walked towards different directions. His face turned beet red whenever he imagined what just happened tonight, maybe he wouldn't be able to sleep for the whole night.

'My eighteenth birthday is his thick, white cu—'

"Aster! You pervert!" Aster slapped his own hot cheek. His mind kept replaying the scene over and over. But it was indeed a nice experience. At least he did his first time with the one he loved. 

'Well, it's not exactly my official first time, since he didn't put his umm… manhood inside me…'

"My god, I need to shower now," Aster sighed. He thought he was free from dirty affairs like this, especially because he was raised as a high aristocrat. But he did read some m.a.t.u.r.e books before and kept the scenes inside his head. 

Aster passed the corridor and went to his room. There was no servant or guard around his corridor, which was strange, because usually it was packed until Aster ordered them to rest. 

Aster sharpened his sense, he had a feeling that he was being followed by someone. His eyes checked around the corner, but he found no one. 

'Weird, I usually have a keen sense to detect a hostile shadow guard.'

Aster walked to his room, he pushed the door and saw Charles sat on a chair in the middle of the room. He smirked and said, "Welcome back, darling. How is your trip to the hill?"

Aster instinctively took a step back and was about to run. But when he turned his head, there were already three shadow guards blocking his way. He screamed, "RAMU--!" his mouth was covered with a strong hand. He was pulled to the room and the door was closed. 

Charles covered Aster's mouth, he locked the door and threw Aster to the bed. Aster stood again and tried to run to the balcony, he was going to scream so the Lantern Palace's shadow guards would hear him.

"HEL—Mmpf!" Charles caught him again and locked the balcony door. Aster was trapped inside his room with Charles. Aster's looked around to find a weapon, which was ridiculous in Charles' eyes. He raised his eyebrows.

"My darling, didn't you remember that you got rid of all the weapons in your room because you hate a dangerous object?" Charles sneered.

"H—How did you know?!" 

Charles laughed sarcastically. He approached Aster and gripped his hand, he pulled Aster to his embrace and Charles whispered, 'I know all about you, your activities, your action, and your heart. I've been observing you since you were three years old.'

Aster was scared with this current Charles. This was the same Charles that was going to take his purity in that meadow. He was full of possessiveness and absurdity. 

Aster struggled, but Charles leisurely sat on the bed with Aster sitting on his l.a.p, "Just face it, Aster. You won't beat me physically."

Aster struggled for the last time, but Charles didn't even budge. Aster gasped a few times and finally spoke, "What are you going to do?"

Charles sighed, he kissed Aster's cheek and then spat to the side, "He kissed you here too," Charles took his handkerchief and wiped Aster's cheek gently, then kissed it again. 

"You are familiar to me, Aster. Even your scent already replaced my sweet sense. Because everything sweet always reminds me of you."

Aster was going to struggle again, but somehow, Charles' words only made him feel slightly disturbed. Because all his words had a different impact on him tonight.

'Charles… talks with his heart?'

It made Aster feel guilty for not reciprocating Charles' feeling, but Aster indeed never felt the same attraction to Charles. Because he already regarded Charles as his family. 

"Maybe I was too soft to you, so you can daringly cheat on me…" 

"We never have that kind of relationship in the first place! Charles, wake up! We are cousins!" Aster refuted him. 

Charles ignored Aster and continued his monologue, "I've been preparing for my coronation for years. I went to other countries and racked many achievements for you, Aster. Because I want them to accept you as my Empress when we got married."

Charles' grip in Aster's waist tightened. Aster was suffocated, "Urk! C—Charles, please let go…"

"Maybe I should take your purity right here right now," Charles kissed Aster's lips and then neck, "But you need to bathe first, there are too many of that filthy slave's marks on your body."

Charles took Aster to the bathroom, and put Aster gently to the bathtub. He stripped Aster's clothes and then pushed his head to the water, he held Aster's head under the water. 

Aster was drowning inside the bathtub. He struggled as hard as he could, his hand was reaching Charles' shoulders. 

"I'm sorry, my darling, it won't be long. We just need to cleanse you from that filth. Don't worry, I will kill him after we have our first night together."

Aster felt that his consciousness slowly drifting away, but his hand still struggled and he clawed Charles' cheek until it bled. 

When Charles realized that his cheek was bleeding, let go of his darling. Aster's head finally came out of the water and he coughed many times. He looked at Charles angrily, but was stunned when he saw something that was unbelievable.

Tears fell from Charles' golden and black eyes. His eyes were pure golden, but there were many black spots around the edges.

Charles seemed to be in trance, but the tears kept falling to the bathtub. He reached Aster's hand and put it on his c.h.e.s.t. Aster could feel a warm heartbeat of Charles. 

"Aster, here. It is really painful here."

"It never felt like this, it was empty before. Is this what they call grief?"

Charles hugged Aster and he let his tears flow on Aster's shoulder, "You are hurting me, Aster, I can't bear it."

**

My darling, I am a man ready to demolish the world

Please treat me gently,

Because you are the only one that could break me.

**