Chapter 180 - Renz's Troubling Thoughts

Renz, Samantha, and Micaela were in the kitchen, preparing food for dinner although they already knew that Selene had no appetite.

They still tried to cook food for Selene. She has excessively lost weight for the past few days. She was not eating nor sleeping. She always stayed up all night as she watched Grandma Elysa's remains.

No one could talk to her properly except for Eros. She would not listen to everyone except Eros.

They relied on Eros for the past few days in taking care of Selene. Though she was trying her best to look fine outside and put on a brave front, they knew that Selene was breaking inside.

"Are we all staying here tonight to accompany Selene?" Samantha asked Micaela and Renz who were busy slicing the vegetables.

"Yes, I am staying here. I know how hard it was for Selene to go back here without Grandma Elysa," Micaela promptly responded as she gazed at Renz.

Renz was avoiding Micaela as much as possible. He was not even looking at her. He felt uncomfortable with her presence.

He would prefer if Micaela was not there. But Samantha might notice something if he would insist on sending her away.

Aside from Micaela, Renz also had another concern that kept on troubling him for these past few days.

Selene was acting strangely towards him. He could feel her cold treatment as if she was upset and mad at him about something. However, he couldn't ask her.

Selene was shutting herself from everyone except Eros, also known as Gabriel. This fact also bugged Renz. He was jealous of seeing Selene relying more on Eros than him.

He couldn't figure out what was going on between Selene and him but he knew that there was something wrong. As much as he wanted to ask her, he couldn't bring it up to Selene.

It was not the right time to confront Selene and ask her about their relationship and status. 

But he was troubled by the way Selene was acting in front of him as if there was an invisible wall or barrier between them.

Renz was lost in his thoughts when the knife slid on his hand thus cutting his finger accidentally.

"Argh!"

Micaela and Samantha turned in his direction only to see Renz holding his bleeding finger.

"Renz, be careful!" Micaela immediately approached him, checking his wound. But Renz retreated his hand away from Micaela.

"Renz, are you planning to include your finger in our recipe's ingredients?" Samantha said jokingly before leaving the kitchen to get the first aid kit.

When Samantha left, Micaela tried to grab Renz's hand but he moved away from her.

"Micaela, please leave me alone. Don't get closer to me." Renz said coldly.

He was not in a good mood today and Micaela's presence was making it worse. He couldn't help but take his frustration out on her.

Every time he would see her, he was reminded of a sin he committed against Selene, his fiancee.

Micaela narrowed her eyes at Renz. "Why are you so harsh to me, Renz? I am just worried about you!"

"You shouldn't be here. You should leave." Renz said to her indifferently.

"Why should I? I am Selene's best friend. I want to comfort her. You don't have the right to take that away from me!" 

"If you are truly her friend, then why did you have to do that? Calling me to come into your dormitory and asking me to sleep with you even though you already know that I am your best friend's fiancee?"

"How about you, Renz? You are engaged but you couldn't even control your lust. You enjoyed being pleasured by another woman who is not your fiancee? Will you deny it? You even kissed me back, Renz! You also wanted it. Admit it! You are desiring me, fantasizing about me!"

"Stop it, Micaela!" Renz was mad, not only at Micaela but also at himself.

Micaela was about to say something more when Samantha came back.

"Hey, both of you, what's wrong with your faces?" Samantha asked them in confusion.

"Are you two fighting?"

Micaela: "No!"

Renz: "No!"

"O-Okay, you don't have to yell at me," Samantha said to them as they accidentally raised their voice on her.

"Renz wash your wound in the running water. Stop slicing vegetables already. After bandaging your cut, just go to Selene. Leave the work here to me and Micaela. You should stay by Selene's side in times like this. Instead of cooking here, you should go and comfort her," Samantha said, lecturing Renz.

Renz looked down, feeling dejected. He was worried that Selene would send him away again.

"Alright. I know," Renz meekly said before walking over to the sink to clean his wound. Renz put bandages on his cut and decided to go upstairs to check on Selene.

Meanwhile, in her room, Selene was still crying when Eros entered the room. He could no longer stay outside just listening to her sobs.

He traced his steps towards the bed and saw Selene lying while hugging Grandma Elysa's picture. 

He sat down at the edge of the bed and spoke up.

"Selene, forgive me if I barged into your room without asking your permission," Eros apologized right away.

Selene opened her swollen eyes the moment she heard his voice. She didn't mind it at all. Selene sat up and hugged Eros. She buried her face on his chest as she continued crying.

"Eros, it really hurts knowing that I will never see my Grandma anymore when I wake up tomorrow. This house feels so empty. I feel so sad and lonely. Can I still go on?"

Eros could feel the helplessness in Selene's voice. Eros hugged her back, stroking her hair.

"Of course, you can. You have to Selene. Though you cannot see Grandma Elysa, she will always be there with you… She will stay alive in your heart and in your mind." Eros said, comforting Selene.

"Be strong Selene. Your grandma always wishes to see you happy and healthy. Don't let her down, okay? Don't make her worry."

Selene nodded her head and she moved closer to Eros, just hugging him. They were in that state when Renz opened the door of her room.