15 It's Time to Go

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I was in a daze.

I was so fueled by my hatred and loathing that I failed to notice that doctor had slumped on the ground, unconscious.I was hypnotized by my own negative feelings, it was like I was in a bubble.I bubble that was filled with only me and my thoughts.

Such nasty thoughts.

But one thought in particular broke the bubble.

It was a thought that embodied my powerlessness and hatred.

It won't help.

It was such a simple thought, only made of 3 words.But it was a thought that caused me to fall to ground on my knees and let out a heart-wrenching cry.Because there was nothing that I could do.I cannot get out of these stone walls, I cannot escape these awful people, I cannot see the sun ever again.

All I can do is give up.A feeling of complete and true hopelessness encompasses me.It's more than the former feeling of hopelessness, this feeling was not one of suddenly finding that I cannot help myself, it was one of knowing that I never had such a feeling in the first place.

I cry, I yell, I scream.Anything that will get rid of the delusion that was hope.

Because there was no hope.

With a single laugh, I stood up and sighed.I was accepting my horrible fate.My horrible fate of being a caged bird.

I stood up, and looked at the scene before me.

The doctors unconscious body was slumped on the ground with gory red marks on his neck, there was broken instruments and tools laying on the ground.

Ah.It's time to go.@@