Chapter 411: One Funny Guy to Another

And after i felt the hot ooze of gore in my skin, i thought in vivid clarity.

"THIS IS REAL!"

I stayed still.

"ABILITIES!" i shouted in my brain.

And nothing happened.

FUCK!

HAHAHA!

"Ability..." i whispered and the same thing occurred.

What it all a lie?

"DAMN that moronic Radix something. If i get my hand on it, i would eat it raw and spit it out down my butthole." I cursed and peeked under the fresh grave that i was in.

I could smell the bloodlust of the people. They smashed the children first and mercilessly used their limbs as weapons.

HAHAHA! Crafty and barbaric. I love it!

While others used their fists and tackled and mowed anyone who come near them.

In the end, after 5 minutes of rampage, only the hushed tones of the wounded and dying were gracing the battlefield.

Anyone who cried was torn apart by the survivors in our midst.

"Congratulations. Players will be given a reward for completing the first stage of the assessment.

You will now be transported into another world for the second stage. Rewards will be given according to the number of people you killed. Goodluck!

Number of remaining humans. 5,318,484,327

FLASH!

From my fallen position i found myself looking at the bright moon in the sky.

The daytime that had blessed the field of massacre before was no more and the shadowed foliage greeted my sight in all direction.

"You have a gift box. Please open it for your reward." I heard the words and a blue box materialized in my front.

FUCK IT!

Step step step

I moved away from my initial position and hid again. You can never be too careful. HAHAHA!

Especially if you were one inside the unbelievable situation i was in. Hmmmmm…

"Open the box." I chanted in my thoughts and what do you know, it did open.

HAHAHA! And it gave me nothing but the four corners of the thing deflating itself apart before my eyes.

"You have attained zero kill. Hence, you got zero reward. Please keep up the good work, Player Seth."

FUCK THIS STUPID GAME!

"Abilities!" i thought fiercely, hoping that it would somehow give me something unlike my previous sad attempts.

1. Invulnerability - takes no physical damage for a time. (limit 3 seconds)

2. Healing Touch - can heal the user and others.

3. Fist of Justice - imbues the Paladin's fist with the power of faith. (low attack, negates evil magic)

The first and the second were good skills but the last was total trash. HAHAHA! But it will have to do. For now.

"AHHHHHHH!"

"FUCK YOU!"

Screams of battle were beginning to resound in the forest. I crept to the nearest disturbance and i saw a man and a woman locked in a great struggle.

The man was fat and his big belly bulged mightily below him. HAHAHA! But his stature was a mere facade.

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

Afterimages of the fat dude decorated the area in chaos. A fat ninja. HAHAHA! What an epic scene.

But this contradiction didn't move me much. What took most of my attention was the girl who stood unnerve by the unending streams of attack.

She stayed there unfazed and would take only a step or two but would aptly evade her nimble foe. Her pretty blue eyes pierced the field and then she moved her head exactly at my direction.

Our eyes met and all i said to myself.

Will fucking her be as real as in the real world?

"Shall we test it?"

HAHAHA!

I grinned like a fool and awaited for the best chance to strike. I took my time well enough but in consequence failed to notice the gentle rustling of leaves behind me.

"PAK!" A great shadow enveloped my entire being and before long, i could feel that i was forcefully squeezed tight by an irresistible force. 

I tried to shout for help but even speaking was a luxury at this time. A few moments more and i could feel something swallowing me slowly.

SHIT!

I was being devoured by a stupid giant snake right now! What trash luck do i have?!

'Invulnerability!' I shouted in my mind and that availed me respite for 3 breaths only.

Being immune from damage did not mean that i was strong enough to escape the lover's embrace of the hungry serpent that coiled around my body.

A full minute passed and one very funny guy landed inside the stomach of a big snake. It was also at this moment when our bored gamer made his presence known unto this new challenge.

"PUCHI!" The snake exploded into bits and pieces courtesy of course from our very own heavenly treasure. The clay brick was kind enough to do this for our bored gamer.

"My entrance just keeps getting better and better."

"You get even more creative with every single world, partner."

"Well done. Very well done indeed." Clark praised his op cheat but it was clear that sarcasm has masked his words rather plainly.

"BOOM!"

"BOOM!"

"BOOM!" The fight between two quick figures continued and it was easy to tell that they would find no winner between them anytime soon. They were both skilled and cunning.

To this, our bored gamer could not care less for the two of them. He left the fat ninja and the beautiful woman behind without any second thought.

'Whoever created this game wanted me to kill.'

'Then why don't i kill them all instead when i conquered this world as mine!' Clark vowed and planned to take revenge for the countless men, women, and children inside this sick game.

They did not wish to be here and yet they were helpless and was forced to slaughter their own kind in order to survive. This was a most inventive way to nurture cruelty and pain.

"I will see you soon enough, Radix." Clark whispered and then began to look for opportunities to save those that needed his help.

With billions at play, our good gamer was immediately overwhelmed with the task.